Writing for Impact

Overview Information on Writing Military Style How to Write an Effective Bullet Examples and Quiz

Writing Military Style Why is it so important? Recognition: Quarterly and annual awards, career-specific awards—helps to build careers Promotion: Enlisted Performance Reports (EPRs) and Officer Performance Reports (OPRs) are critical to the promotion system— they can MAKE or BREAK a career!

Writing Military Style, cont. Who needs to know how to write using military style? You do here as students Supervisors Others involved in the writing and reviewing process

Writing Military Style, cont. When can I use this information? For yourself: Promotion Recommendation Forms (PRFs), OPRs and 1206s For your airmen: EPRs and 1206s, other enlisted promotion packages

Basic Formatting Techniques Definition (T&Q): A clear, concise ‘bottom line’ of an idea or a single accomplishment and its impact.

Basic Formatting Techniques Definition (T&Q): A clear, concise ‘bottom line’ of an idea or a single accomplishment and its impact. NOTE: Bullet format breaks the rules of standard grammar—focuses on concise specifics rather than general information

Basic Formatting Techniques Punctuation and Grammar Telegraphic bullets do not have periods Use the double dash (--), ellipsis (…) and semicolon (;) to indicate a pause or break in thought Use exclamation marks sparingly Generally, avoid using articles (a, an, the), conjunctions (and, but, or) and pronouns (he, she, him, her) Avoid using negative words (isn’t, can’t)

Basic Formatting Techniques, cont. Size of Bullets: One to three lines long; primary shouldn’t have more than one or two secondary (sub-) bullets Sub-bullets indicate result, impact or scope Length: Leave as little “white space” as possible….avoid carrying over a single word to the next line—don’t waste! Maximize all the “white space” in the block….

Writing Tips Objective: Describe an accurate word picture of an individual in the reader’s mind; approach this as a “top priority” Outcome: This can have a direct impact on individual’s careers—you’ll have the awesome opportunity to help others obtain their goals and dreams!

Writing Tips, cont. Use “hard-hitting” facts, actions and phrases; start with a strong, fact-filled statement Each bullet should contain substance; limit fluff Be enthusiastic, and make your writing come alive! Use active voice…. Use common terms everyday people can understand, instead of using job specific jargon Validate with comments from outside agencies (HQ USAF, MAJCOM, Wing, etc.)

Three Parts to an Effective Bullet Action Result (aka accomplishment) Impact

Three Parts to an Effective Bullet ACTION: What did the person do? Be specific, yet brief Focus on what the person did and their leadership and management abilities Example: Managed 49 LG block training

Examples Other words to begin the action: Spearheaded Masterfully orchestrated Performed Implemented

Three Parts to an Effective Bullet RESULT: What occurred because of the action? Again, specific but brief Quantify as much as possible: use percentages, numbers, time/money values (saved), number supervised and resource oversight Example: provided superb training to 350 people

Three Parts to an Effective Bullet IMPACT: What is the overall significance? Qualify and quantify here too…helps the reader know why each action and result was so important How did this impact the overall mission and/or bigger picture? Example: reduced overdues to zero

Three Parts to an Effective Bullet Completed bullet: Managed 49 LG block training; provided superb training to 350 people…reduced overdues to zero

Other “Tips of the Trade” The Last Bullets in Rating Sections Stratification: use to rank top personnel; show how individual stands out from peers (top x%, my #1, my best)…. hard-hitting, enthusiastic, with strong “written recommendation” for promotion “#3 of 89 SMSgts at USAFA” “None better! My #1 choice for training manager” “Best in the training business! USAF Education and Training Manager of the Year (HQs Level) for 2001!”

Other “Tips of the Trade”, cont. The Last Bullets in Rating Sections Promotion recommendations for EPRs “Promotion to chief this board a must!” No recommendation may be taken as “don’t promote” by readers, and viewed negatively by board members PME or “next” job recommendation for officers NOTE: Keep the last bullet to one line

CY02 Central Chief Master Sergeant Evaluation Board Headquarters U.S. Air Force Headquarters U.S. Air Force CY02 Central Chief Master Sergeant Evaluation Board 15 Oct 02 15 Oct 02 02 I n t e g r i t y - S e r v i c e - E x c e l l e n c e I n t e g r i t y - S e r v i c e - E x c e l l e n c e

Observations 15 Oct 02 STRATIFICATION IS A BIG, BIG DEAL!!!!!! #1 of XX SMSgts #1 of XX SNCOs Top % of XX SMSgts Top % of XX SNCOs If a rater writes “top 1% of xxx SNCOs/SMSgts…make sure the XX is over 100 Need Senior Rater Endorsement Consistent w/TIG 0-10 senior rater/0-6 senior rater…carry the same weight Words/stratification is the key…not the grade of the senior rater CHIEFS HAVE LOTS OF INFLUENCE When Chiefs write, “make this individual a chief”, the other chiefs listen! 15 Oct 02 I n t e g r i t y - S e r v i c e - E x c e l l e n c e I n t e g r i t y - S e r v i c e - E x c e l l e n c e

Other “Tips of the Trade”, cont. For EPRs you can use additional duties and volunteer/community support activities, but use sparingly For 1206s, typical headings include: Leadership and Job Performance in Primary Duty Self Improvement Base/Community Involvement

A Word of Advice…. Be careful using certain words that may weaken phrases that otherwise would be strong. These can make a sterling performer into an instant weak one…. rarely almost usually seldom one-of-the

Examples

Has an action, result and impact Good Example Expertly administered the training requirements for 143 individuals and tracked 129 special operations courses; achieved a 100 percent course utilization rate--enhanced overall mobility readiness Has an action, result and impact

Poor Example Truly an outstanding SNCO, leader, supervisor and manager who possesses resourcefulness, initiative and charter to accept and succeed at the most demanding of tasks--exudes the Air Force in all he does Action has no “hard-hitting” facts or result and impact; reads more like a narrative description

Quiz

Has action, result and impact Quiz Created a Strategic Plan for Enlisted Training; identified goals, purpose, objectives and metrics--benchmarked as model for use AF-wide Good Has action, result and impact

Has the action, but still needs the result and impact Quiz - Outstanding manager of resources--aggressively validated and tracked more than $300M in obligations! Good and Poor Has the action, but still needs the result and impact

Quiz - Developed, tested and maintained certification and accreditation of all 20th Bomb Squadron computers Poor No result or impact; no quantification; reads more like a duty description

Summary Information on Writing Military Style How to Write an Effective Bullet Examples and Quiz

“Of all those arts in which the wise excel, Nature’s chief masterpiece is writing well.” ~ Duke of Buckinghamshire Sheffield