2. What is your “ideal” personality? –Friendship –Relationship What characteristics are bad in a personality? How do we choose our partners? What’s most important when we choose our partners? Why?

4. broad, long-lasting patterns behavior A person’s broad, long-lasting patterns of behavior. Our consistent actions from day to day. People don’t always see our “real” personality!!

5. Theories that assume that powerful inner forces shape personality and motivate behavior. The core of our behavior is centered in the mind by motivations that we are aware of and by some that we are not. (the Unconscious) (Psychic Energy) (hunger, thirst keep alive) (Sexual and violent urges) (Pushing desires and urges into unconscious)

6. Freudian Slip Cartoons http://www.thehumorarchi ves.com/joke/News_anchor _Freudian_Slip

7. Collection of unknown information unavailable for retrieval Information processing that we are not aware of.

8. (eros, libido, drives) Uncontrolled search for gratification. (sexual, physical, emotional) Morals learned from society What is right? ARBITRATES Reasonable choices VS. Pleasurable demands Internal energy that wants to release these desires

9. Followed Freud for a while, but added a few things. Inherited universal human concepts. Contains inherited ideas & tendencies

10. People try to meet the standards set by their ideals. A “mask” that people wear to fool what everyone thinks of them.

11. Age (approx.)ChallengeResolveFail to resolve 0 to 1½Trust vs. Mistrust Rely on forces outside ourselves Insecurity and Anxiety 1 ½ to 3Autonomy vs. Self-Doubt Control self, make things happen Inadequacy of self control 3 to 6Initiative vs. Guilt Confident, ability to create Lack a sense of Self-Worth 6 to pubertyCompetence vs. Inferiority Skills develop, become accepted Feelings of failure, unworthy AdolescenceIdentity vs. Role Confusion Comfortable with self & roles Feel fragmented or unclear of self Early AdulthoodIntimacy vs. Isolation Capacity for closeness Loneliness, separation Middle AdulthoodGenerativity vs. Stagnation Focus & concern beyond oneself Self-Indulgent concerns Late AdulthoodEgo-integrity vs. despair Sense of Satisfaction Feelings of Futility

12. acts & behaviors rewards & punishments Focuses on acts & behaviors, and the rewards & punishments that you receive afterward. events that strengthen bringing the desired result Our personality is created by events that strengthen a behavior by bringing the desired result. People learn what the consequences will be, and choose one experience over another. Learning by imitating others.

13. Theories that focus on a person’s personal growth & potential. A constant striving to realize one’s potential & to develop meaningful goals.

14. Comes from “Positive Regard” – viewing oneself positively based on feedback from others We try to meet people’s “conditions of worth” – conditions a person must meet in order to receive positive feedback from others. When the “conditions” match my “true self” I can move towards self-actualization

15. Self-doubt, self-consciousness, & disagreements with “conditions” prevent us from being self- actualized, and creates ANXIETY. Progress towards self-actualization is greatly aided by “Unconditional Positive Regard” – When significant others accept you for what you are, not what you can do. I am “fully-functioning” and get to be exactly the person that I really am. I have reached my Full Potential.

16. Parenting Choices for children Parents are “BOSS”, Do not have to explain their actions or demands Children participate in decisions, Discussion and Negotiation Children have Final Say, Parents guide, but don’t tell Parents are self-centered, Distant from children

17. Adler’s Research on Birth Order tendencies. - Seek Approval, Seek attention thru conformity. If this fails – Can misbehave Strive to Please, Often develop as leaders. Can be critical of failure.

18. - More Creative, Less worried about conformity - Often adaptable to both age & situation, Fights Injustice, “Life is Unfair” - May be hypercritical of others, The “rebel” craving attention - Expects other to do things, or make decisions - Can develop sense of inferiority, & become a “speeder” to overtake siblings. -Big Planner, can be spoiled, Like to get their way.

19. - Can be Self-Centered - May not share well, overprotected. - Prefer adult company, Plays “divide and conquer” to get ahead. - Please others only when THEY want to

20. The Role of Peers The surrounding of self with other individuals. Divided by gender & class Divided by activities Groups get smaller & closer

21. Smaller exclusive groups within a larger group Acting in accordance with some specified authority.

22. Stress pushes us towards other people for support. This helps support self-esteem development. I’M DOING THINGS RIGHT !! Unsure seeks others to show them, Sureness brings about independent action

23. Who is literally the closest? Work & Living “Stimulation” – from new ideas “Help” – in achieving goals “Support” – when times are bad “Approval” – when times are good People feel better about themselves when they associate with people whom others consider desirable.

25. Beauty as a result of balance or harmonious arrangement.

31. We like people who agree with us We believe people who share our values are decent & intelligent. Some opposites attract. (Ex. Dominant personality with Submissive personality.) Makes communication easier, and predicting people’s behavior gives us comfort.

32. Respect for another person and the feeling that he or she is similar to you. The active concern for the life & growth of that which we love. The state in which the happiness of another person is essential to our own.

33. Romantic Love – “Summer Romance” Infatuation – Obsessive love at 1 st Sight or one night stand Fatuous Love – Short whirlwind relationships Empty Love – Staying married for other reasons Companionate Long-term friendship or marriage that’s lost passion Liking – Short friendships without passion Consummate Love – Complete love with all 3 factors. The IDEAL

34. Can survive with 2 sides, but 3 is best Good Role Models Happy kids make happy adults, happy adults make good marriages Marrying someone from your own social group Marrying someone with similar attributes (age, physique, attractiveness)

35. 4. Lack of time to experience different facets of love 2. Image of themselves does not coincide with partner’s image 3. Disagreement on what each person’s role is 1. Couple’s needs are not compatible 5. Over commitment to other roles. (job, friendships, parenting)