1. Guiding Children’s Behavior
HPC 3O
May 2nd, 2013

2. Understanding Guidance
Punishment is only a small part of guiding children
Guidance: using firmness and understanding to help children learn to control their own behavior

3. Understanding Guidance
As a result of effective guidance, children achieve self-discipline  ability to control their own behavior

4. Understanding Guidance
Why is effective guidance important?
Helps children learn to get along with others
Handle feelings in an acceptable way
Promotes security and a positive feeling about self
Moral development
Developing a conscience - - inner sense of what is right

5. Consistency
Clearly making rules an applying them in the same way in all situations
Children lose trust in a caregiver who constantly changes rules or fails to enforce them
What should a parent do if more than one person cares for the child?

6. Guiding Behavior 3 ways to guide children to behave:
Encouraging appropriate behavior
Setting and enforcing limits
Dealing with inappropriate behavior in effective ways

7. Encouraging Appropriate Behavior
3 ways:
Setting a good example
Telling what is expected
Praising appropriate behavior  positive reinforcement

8. Encouraging Appropriate Behavior
Be specific
Notice the behavior as soon as possible
Recognize small steps
Help the child take pride in his or her actions
Tailor the encouragement to the needs of the child

9. Setting Limits
Limits include physical restrictions or rules of behavior
Limits should keep children from hurting themselves, other people or property
Should be few and reasonable!

10. What Should Limits Be?
Does the limit allow the child to learn, explore and grow?
Is the limit fair and appropriate for the child’s age?
Does the limit benefit the child, or is it merely for the adult’s convenience?

11. Making Limits Clear
Clearly state limits and restate everytime the situation arises
Limits must be clear  have a “small snack” is unclear for a 3-year old
Calm, direct tone

12. Making Limits Clear Setting limits includes four steps:
Show understanding of the child’s desires
Set the limit and explain it
Acknowledge the child’s feelings
Give alternatives

13. Dealing with Inappropriate Behavior
A caregiver should ask these questions when responding to a child’s misbehavior:
Is the expected behavior appropriate given the child’s development?
Does the child understand the behavior is wrong?
Was the behavior knowingly and deliberately?

14. Dealing with Inappropriate Behavior
Unintentional Misbehavior:
Spilling milk or juice for example  shouldn’t be punished!
If the child had no way of knowing it was wrong  Brittany picking flowers from the park

15. Dealing with Inappropriate Behavior
Using Punishment Effectively:
Deliberate attempts
Punishment is negative reinforcement  response aimed at discouraging a child from repeating a behavior

16. Dealing with Inappropriate Behavior
Using Punishment Effectively:
1st time child breaks rule  a warning is fine
Rule broken another time  punishment given according to severity of misbehavior

17. Dealing with Inappropriate Behavior
Techniques for dealing with inappropriate behavior:
Natural consequences
Loss of privileges: Take away a privilege. Most effective for ages 5 and older
Giving time-out: Short period of time in which a child sits away from other people and the center of activity

18. Dealing with Inappropriate Behavior
Poor Disciplinary Measures:
Bribing
Making children promise to behave: forced to lie about misbehavior rather than disappoint
Shouting or yelling
Shaming or belittling
Threatening to withhold love

19. Handling Conflict
Anger – a natural emotion. Do not make the child feel guilty about it
Caregivers can help the child learn that there are acceptable ways of handling that anger

20. Handling Conflict Ways of handling anger: Using words Speaking calmly
Counting to ten
Discuss the misbehavior and punishment after the child has calmed down. Explain how they misbehaved and what they should have done instead*