1. COMMUNICATION: FOR BETTER OR FOR WORST Family Life Week 2015 Sunday February 1, 2015

2. COMMUNICATION A DEFINATION Communication is the process of exchanging information and feelings between two or more persons It is verbal; this is what we say Its is also non verbal; this is the message about the message. Communication is one of the most important features of a happy marriage and family! HOW DO WE COMMUNICATE FOR BETTER

3. COMMUNICATION In marriage and the Family Communication should be: People expressing themselves in a caring and concerned manner When one talks the other listens In communication you will want the best for others When differences occur they will be delt with by respecting the other person’s needs and desires

4. COMMUNICATION There will be an effort to understand each other’s point of view and to respond with empathy There will be an attitude of submission and a willingness to consider giving up your own needs and desires for the sake of others and the relationship All will work together to get solutions through mutual acceptance, commitment, forgiveness, and servanthood

5. COMMUNICATION SECRETS THE WAYS WE COMMUNICATION Every message has three components 1. The actual content 2. The tone of voice 3. The nonverbal communication

6. COMMUNICATION Every message has three components 1. The actual content = 7% 2. The tone of voice = 38% 3. The nonverbal communication (gestures) = 55%

7. COMMUNICATION

8. COMMUNICATION We can tell 1. sincerity or insincerity 2. conviction or lack of conviction 3. truth or falsity Of statements we hear by RATE OF SPEECH, VOICE PITCH, LOUDNESS, AND VOICE QUALITY

9. COMMUNICATION Faulty communication practices Eph. 4:25,29 1. Criticism/quarreling 2. Lying 3. Faultfinding 4. Silent treatment 5. Talking too much 6. Bad joking 7. Cursing

10. COMMUNICATION Learn to Listen - James 1:9 1. Listening means you are not thinking about what you are going to say - Pro. 18:13 2. Listening means that you are accepting of what is being said without judging the other person or what the person is saying 3. Listening means being able to repeat what your sweetheart has said, and be able to express what the other person is feeling. This is called reflective listening.

11. COMMUNICATION SECRETS 1. Make communication a priority 2. Establish and maintain eye contact 3. Ask open ended questions 4. Use reflective listening 5. Use “I” statements 6. Touch 7. Use “soft” emotions

12. COMMUNICATION SECRETS 8. Avoid negative expressivity 9. Say positive things about your spouse 10. Tell your partner what you want 11. Stay focused on the issue 12. Make specific resolutions to disagree 13. Give congruent messages 14. Keep the process communication going 15. Keep God in your communication

13. COMMUNICATION SECRETS At the end of the day family members should be specialists at communication. It should be made priority It should be family friendly Communication should be redemptive, we do it not just for earthly harmony and joy, but also for heavenly harmony and joy. While it should be self focused, it must also be other focused.