1. WOC Diagnostic - 2012-13

2. Remember to take Cornell Notes 1. Heading Topic: Diagnostic Feedback 3. Ask questions or write key concepts here Summary: 2. Take notes on the PowerPoint presentation here: - (at home)

3. Rubric discussion + connection with Intellectual Standards (Critical Thinking Booklet), p. 8 and 10. - Clarity - Precision

4. LAUDABLE ENDEAVORS ““All of my friends judged and criticized me for choosing to join a few clubs at school. Even my parents objected once I have informed them about my decision.”

5. LESS Laudable Endeavors  “When you put attention to something, you can always do good and feel good about yourself. ”

6. Laudable Endeavors  “Although some of my family members are generally supportive and positive, some of them are unknowingly offensive.”

7. LESS Laudable Endeavors  “Im good, man, an’ I’m thinkin’ to myself, well, its like Im a good writter.”

8. Laudable Endeavors  “However, my dream was shattered not too long after revealing my fantasy to my mother about becoming an FBI agent.”

9. LESS Laudable Endeavors  “ Me and my brother went there and had an amazing time with all the stuff.” (a cousin’s party)

10. What does “r.o” stand for?  “I was thrilled to see my little nephew I missed him”  What’s the easiest fix for a run-on? e.g..,and,but,so

11. What does “c.s.” stand for?  “I was thrilled to see my little nephew, I missed him”  What’s the easiest fix for a comma splice? e.g..,and,but,so

12. What’s a fragment?  “We had to do a bell-ringer. Plus answering a question.”  How can you fix this fragment?

13. Stay away from the following words in formal writing: Good, bad, happy, sadStuff, thing, thingy Everything, everyone, everybody, anyone, anything, nothing People (unless NATION) You a lot, alot Awesome, cool, wonderful, great, amazing, nice Basically, actually, reallyoverusing “says” or “tells” overusing “do” e.g. do hair, do homework,

14. List of “banned” words in academic writing!!!

15. Verbs to use instead of “says” or “said”:  advise encourage invite remind warn  agree decide offer promise refuse threaten  admit agree decide deny explain insist promise recommend suggest  reprimand deny recommend suggest accuse blame congratulate apologize insist inform express

16. Writing Workshop (beginning of essay):  “I have a memory about when I graduated from the 8 th grade. Before I graduated I was at my cousin Anna house in June, 2011. I spent a night because my aunt was doing my hair. Later on that night we were messing with her older brother and watched a movie called 8 Miles. We stayed up until like about 3 or something in the morning! Finally, we went to bed.”

17. Suggestions:  I remember my eighth grade graduation. The night before the graduation I was at my cousin Anna’s house because my aunt was weaving in braids/ gluing in my hair extensions/ straightening my hair. Later on that night, Adrianna and I were teasing her older brother and watched…

18. Exemplary student work  As you hear your peers read aloud their exemplary essays, think about and take notes on the following: 1) What makes this essay memorable and interesting? Be specific. 2) What’s this writer’s tool or “weapon” for making his/her writing come to life?