1. ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED How to Get Promoted
SQL Saturday #291, Chicago, April 26, 2014, Dave Mattingly

2. THE SPEAKER I never did a day’s work in my life.
It was all fun. (Thomas Edison)

3. SQL SATURDAY #286 Louisville, Kentucky Pre-Cons $120 June 21, 2014
Sponsorships still available
Speaker selection this week!
Pre-Cons $120
Grant Fritchey: Performance Tuning in SQL
Dave Fackler: BI Solutions from Start to Finish
Kentucky makes bourbon, fried chicken, and baseball bats. Basically, if it can kill you, we make it. (Mark Klein)

4. I like nonsense. It wakes up the brain cells.
Learn
Mentor
New Ideas
I like nonsense. It wakes up the brain cells.
(Dr. Seuss)

5. EYES OH, GOOD MY BOOK ORDER IS HERE Read Perspective Aim/Goal/Plan
Be careful about reading health books.
You might die of a misprint. (Mark Twain)

6. EARS Play Dumb Learn People Seek Feedback
You cannot truly listen to someone else and
do anything else at the same time. (M. Scott Peck)

7. MOUTH Present/Speak/Teach No Gossip/Swearing Train Successor
Make sure you finish speaking before
your audience has stopped listening. (Dorothy Sarnoff)

8. FACE Smile Be Popular Office Party
Sherlock said, “Arm yourself, there’s an evil hand afoot ahead!” (Bulwer-Lytton 2010 runner-up, Dennis Pearce)

9. SHOULDERS Ask for Responsibility Carry Your Work, Not Chips
Thaw Your Cold Shoulder
Keeping your shoulder to the wheel, nose to the grindstone,
ear to the ground, and eye on the ball makes it hard to work.

10. ELBOWS Do a Good Job Do More than Job Do What Needs Doing
Doing what must be done might not make you happy,
but it will make you great. (George Bernard Shaw)

11. WRIST Respect Time Give Yourself Deadlines Understand Priorities
We have time so everything doesn’t happen all at once.
We have space so it doesn’t all happen to you.

12. HANDS Handshake Share Credit Help Colleagues Succeed
How many people here have telekinetic powers?
Raise my hand. (Emo Philips)

13. FINGERS Write / Blog / Whitepaper Podcast / Vidcast Interview
When I was kidnapped, they cut off my finger and sent it.
My father said he wanted more proof. (Rodney Dangerfield)

14. FINGERPRINTS @datamastr MASTER DATA MASTER Brand Yourself
Promo Yourself
Be Yourself
@datamastr
MASTER
DATA
MASTER
I always wanted to be somebody.
I should have been more specific. (Lily Tomlin)

15. HEART Thank Encourage Find Passion
In art, the hand can never execute anything higher
than the heart can imagine. (Ralph Waldo Emerson)

16. GUTS Comfort Zone Bad News Create Job
Under the bludgeoning of chance, my head is bloodied
but unbowed. (Invictus, William Ernest Henley)

17. BOTTOM I WAITED FOR 30 MINUTES Admit Mistakes Get Rid of the Bad Flush
Sometimes I feel like the overworked butcher who backed into the meat slicer and got a little behind in his work.

18. FEET Travel Events Network Everywhere is walking distance,
if you have the time. (Steven Wright)

19. As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.
SCALE
Measure
Track
Accountability
As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.
(Proverbs 27:17)

20. BODY Clothing Hygiene Exercise Check-Up
You cannot climb the ladder of success
in the costume of failure. (Zig Ziglar)

21. SPIRIT Family Play / Relax Church
Preacher: “We were put here to help others.”
Kid: “What were the others put here for?”

22. Let me ’splain. No, there is too much. Let me sum up.
SUMMARY
Brain
Eyes
Ears
Mouth
Face
Shoulders
Elbows
Wrist
Hands
Fingers
Fingerprint
Heart
Gut
Bottom
Feet
Scale
Body
Spirit
Let me ’splain. No, there is too much. Let me sum up.
(Inigo Montoya)

23. RESOURCES If we knew what we were doing,
it wouldn’t be called research. (Albert Einstein)

24. QUESTIONS
Judge a man by his questions,
not by his answers. (Voltaire)

25. CONTACT dave@blackwyrm.com fb.me/dave.mattingly.3
linkedin.com/in/blackwyrm
@blackwyrm
gplus.to/blackwyrm
Carpe D.M.
Seize the Dave.