Chapter 4 Marriage & Parenthood Lesson 1 The Commitment to Marry

You’ll Learn To… Analyze behavior in a dating relationship that will enhance the dignity, respect, and responsibility relating to marriage. Distinguish between a dating relationship and a marriage. Demonstrate how couples use effective communication skills in building and maintaining healthy relationships. Describe the effects of divorce on adults and children. Explain why teens should delay marriage until they are mature adults.

Marriage- A Lifelong Commitment Marriage is different from a dating relationship in many ways. People who enter a marriage make a lifelong commitment to someone they love. A commitment is a promise or pledge. For a marriage to be successful, both partners must be ready for new responsibilities and challenges.

Marriage- A Lifelong Commitment continued… Marriage allows couples to share their lives together in an intimate, mature way. It provides companionship in both good and hard times. Its important to examine reasons for marrying and to discuss doubts. Successful marriages know one another well and discuss goals and expectations for their life together.

Adjusting to Marriage Making a commitment to someone is just the beginning. In the early stages couples must face the adjustments of sharing living quarters, finances, and families. During this adjustment period, the emotional and social maturity of both partners is crucial.

Adjusting to Marriage continued… Mature people understand their own needs as well as their spouses and know how to meet those needs in healthy ways. Conflicts will arise, and they will have to face these challenges with good communication and compassion.

A Successful Marriage-the husband and wife… agree on important issues in their relationship. share common interests and values. demonstrate affection and share confidences. show a willingness to compromise and put others first. share similarities in family backgrounds. have parents who had a successful marriage.

A Successful Marriage-the husband and wife… do not have major conflicts with their in-laws. have several good friends of both genders. had a long period of close association prior to marriage. have stable jobs and career goals. agree on how they feel about raising children. * these factors do not guarantee a successful marriage, but partners with many of these characteristics have an increased chance of sharing a lasting, happy marriage.

Marriage and Divorce Divorce has risen dramatically over the past several years. Over 50 percent of marriages end in divorce. Children can be devastated when parents divorce. Divorce puts a strain on the entire family.

Marriage and Divorce continued… Although divorce is an adult problem, children may blame themselves for what went wrong. Because divorce affects children so strongly, it is essential that parents explore all options, including couples counseling, before making the decision to end the marriage. Above all, both parents should remain responsible parents.

Joint Custody Sometimes divorced couples have joint custody of their children, meaning that the children alternate living with each parent. One parent may have the children during the week and the other on weekends, or children may live with one parent for six months and the other for the rest of the year. It is important for both parents to remain involved in their children’s lives.

Blended Families People who divorce will often choose to remarry, and it is common for the new spouse to have children. This creates a blended family, or a family where to adults marry and have children from a previous marriage living with them. The new couple may also have children together.

Blended Families continued… Children may experience stress as they adjust to new relationships in the blended family. Emotions such as anger, jealousy, resentment, and sadness are normal To help them adjust, children can talk to their parents, relatives, teachers, counselors or other trusted adults.

Teen Marriage—A Risky Situation Since a successful marriage requires both people to be responsible and mature, the odds are not in favor of people who marry in their teens. Approximately 60% of teen marriages will end in divorce, many within the first few years.

Teen Marriage—A Risky Situation continued… There are good reasons for teens to delay marriage until they are more mature Married teens have to focus too soon on another’s needs and may not have time or energy to work on their own personal growth and development. Married teens may have to postpone college or beginning a career. When these factors limit their earning power, financial difficulties can seriously threaten the marriage. If the teen couple married because of a pregnancy, the emotional and financial stresses on the relationship are even more severe.

Chapter 4 Lesson 1 Review Questions… 1.Define the term commitment. How is commitment to a marriage different from a dating relationship? 2.How does a mature couple handle conflicts? 3.What is a blended family? 4.How does making the decision to delay marriage until they are more mature help teens to promote individual and family health?