Family and Social Health Chapter 7

Health Goal #11: I Will Develop Healthful Family Relationships A family is a group of people who are related by blood, adoption, marriage, or a desire for mutual support A healthful family possesses the skills needed for loving, responsible relationships

Skills Learned in a Healthful Family Self-respective behavior Healthful sexual attitudes Effective communication Clear sense of values Expressing love/affection Respect for authority

Skills Learned in a Healthful Family (cont’d) Responsible decision-making Resolving conflicts Effective coping skills Delaying gratification Give/receive kindness Work ethic

Health Goal #12: I Will Work to Improve Difficult Family Relationships Family relationships are connections a person has with family members Extended family includes step-parents, step- siblings, aunts, uncles, foster siblings A dysfunctional family has members that relate to one another in destructive and irresponsible ways

Causes of Dysfunctional Families Chemical dependence Other addictions Perfectionism Violence Abuse Abandonment Mental disorders Dysfunctional family members may develop codependence Refer to Chapter 6 for codependence information

Improving Dysfunctional Family Relationships There is hope for recovery from codependence Individual therapy (one on one) Group therapy (therapist works with the family group) Recovery programs

Health Goal #13: I Will Make Healthful Adjustments to Family Changes There are many instances when family dynamics or members change Adjustments must be made by parents or the guardian as well as children involved to either create/maintain a healthful environment for the family

Examples of Family Changes/Adjustments Extended families Marital stress/conflict Concept of divorce Single-custody families

Examples of Family Changes/Adjustments (cont’d) Remarriage of a parent Loss of job Incarceration of a parent

Health Goal #14: I Will Develop Healthful Friendships A healthful friendship is a balanced relationship that promotes mutual respect and healthful behavior Having healthy friendships improves quality of life “To have a friend, you must be a friend”

Initiating Friendships Carry on a conversation Handle rejection Recognize shyness/loneliness as hindrances Commit to “balanced friendships” Understand when to end a friendship

Health Goal #15: I Will Develop Dating Skills Dating is: –Having social plans with another person –An extension of friendship –Providing an opportunity to learn more about themselves and others, which leads to Increased self-esteem Improved social skills Developed skills in intimacy Understanding personal needs

Establishing Dating Standards Give your parents/guardian background information on the person you will be dating Tell your parents/guardian your exact plans Arrange for safe transportation Establish a reasonable curfew Establish a personal code of conduct Establish the expected code of conduct for the person you will date

Establishing Dating Skills Do not base self-worth on your ability to get a date Ask questions/receive facts before going on a date Decline the date if there will be pressure to drink or be sexually active Honor your date commitment, regardless if someone better offers Recognize the advantages of dating a variety of people rather than going steady Make a fast exit from a date if your situation will violate your parents/guardian guidelines Don’t hesitate to call your parents/guardian if you need help Feel comfortable about staying home when you don’t want to date Be clear about your expectations when you give/receive a gift in a dating situation Be honest and kind when you turn someone down for a date

Health Goal #16: I Will Practice Abstinence from Sex Abstinence from sex is voluntarily choosing not to be sexually active Only 23% of teens (aged 15-17) agreed that sexual activity is inappropriate for their age group (Kaiser Family Foundation, 2003) Young people do benefit in many ways from abstaining from sex

Reasons to Wait Before Having Sex Marriage STDs (i.e., HIV) Pregnancy Responsibility/character Respect

Benefits of Abstinence from Sex Promotes health Protects safety Follows laws (legal age of consent) Shows respect for self and others Follows guidelines of responsible parents and adults Demonstrates good character Promotes dignity, respect, strength, health, and sexual fidelity in marriage

Changing Behavior of Sexually Active People Write a list of reasons for choosing abstinence Talk to a trusted adult about your past behavior and the reasons for abstinence Consider the negative consequences that might have occurred from sexual activity Set new limits for expression of affection Have a serious discussion with a partner whom you were previously sexual with Get reassurance from your current dating partner that both will practice abstinence Break off the relationship if your partner won’t agree Re-evaluate the influence of your friends Be honest and direct about your commitment to practice abstinence Avoid behaviors, such as alcohol and drugs, that would impair judgment

Health Goal #17: I Will Recognize Harmful Relationships A relationship is a connection a person has with another person A healthful relationship promotes self-respect, encourages productivity, and health that is free from violence and drug involvement A harmful relationship interferes with productivity and health

Recognizing Harmful Relationships The People Pleaser The Enabler The Clinger The Fixer The Distancer The Controller The Center The Abuser The Liar The Promise Breaker Look to see if you could recognize 10 profiles of people who relate in harmful ways

Harmful Match-ups People who relate in harmful ways often are drawn to one another such as: –Promise Breaker and People Pleaser –Controller and Enabler –Clinger and Distancer Be able to recognize these relationships and identify how to change this

Health Goal #18: I Will Develop Skills to Prepare for Marriage Intimacy – deeply shared meaning between two people 4 types of intimacy that are important to sustain a marriage over the years –Philosophical –Psychological –Creative –Physical

10 Factors that Can Predict Success in a Marriage Age Reasons for marriage Length of relationship and engagement Similar attitudes about children and childrearing Similar interests Commitment to sexual fidelity Good character Parents’ success at marriage Parental attitudes toward the potential partner Careful selection of marriage partner

Reasons Why Teen Marriage Is Risky Does not give enough time to develop healthful friendships Does not give enough time to become comfortable with one’s body Does not give enough time to become emotionally independent from adults Does not give enough time to learn skills needed for successful marriage and parenthood Does not give enough time to prepare for a career Does not give enough time to have a clear set of values to guide behavior Does not give enough time to understand and achieve socially responsible behavior

Health Goal #19: I Will Develop Skills to Prepare for Parenthood There are three R’s that young people should consider before becoming a parent –Reasons –Resources –Responsibilities

Responsible Parenting 1.Develop intimacy with child -Philosophical -Psychological -Creative -Physical 2.Caring for children during growth/development 3.Help with self-discipline and self-control - Behavior modification - Logical consequences discipline - Physical punishment

Child Abuse Abuse is harmful treatment and one characteristic of dysfunctional families Physical abuse is harmful treatment that physically harms the victim –It is not the same as discipline –This does not develop self-control and self-discipline Sexual abuse is sexual contact that is forced on the person Emotional abuse is making the victim feel worthless –This should not be confused with constructive criticism The cycle of abuse can occur from one generation to another

Health Goal #20: I Will Practice Abstinence from Sex to Avoid the Risks of Teen Marriage and Parenthood The U.S. has one of the highest rates of teen pregnancy among industrialized nations 4 girls in 10 become pregnant at least once before the age of 20 There are nearly half a million teen births each year Teen moms are likely to have a second birth relatively soon, which could impede the ability to finish school, maintain a job, or escape poverty National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy, 2002

Risks Associated With Being a Baby Born to Teen Parents Low birth weight Damaged heredity material Inadequate parenting skills

Chapter 7 Family and Social Health