Chapter 5 Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning Revising Your Writing

2 Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning Revising Your Writing

3 Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning Principles of Style

4 Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning Revising Your Writing

Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning Write Clearly Words | Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone ALBERTO ZORNETTA/SHUTTERSTOCK.COM

Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning What Is a Simpler Way to Say This? Words | Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning What Words Are Simpler? Words | Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

8 Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning Arrange These Terms from Most to Least Specific Words | Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning What Is a More Specific Way to Say This? Words | Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning How to Avoid Dangling Expressions Words | Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

11 Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning Fun with Dangling Expressions Words | Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning How Can You Fix These Modifier Problems? Words | Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

13 Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning How Can You Clarify These Pronoun References? Bananas seem to have the highest turnover. But the staff is not able to keep up. Most of the time, they run out. Although the owners and partners have changed, they continue to expand. Words | Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning What Is More Natural, Original Language? Words | Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

15 Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning What Do These Slang Expressions Mean? Win-win situation Synergies Low-hanging fruit By COB tomorrow Paradigm shift Best practices At the end of the day Words | Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning Write Concisely Avoid redundancy and wordy expressions Avoid hidden verbs and subjects Words | Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning How Can You Eliminate the Redundancies? Words | Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning How Can You Eliminate Wordiness? Words | Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning How Can You Reveal the Hidden Verbs? Words | Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

20 Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning Which Is the Best Choice for What Audience and Purpose? Words | Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning Use Track Changes in Word

22 Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning Revising Your Writing

23 Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning Writing Effective Sentences Words| Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning How Can You Make These Active Voice? Past Tense Future Tense Words| Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

25 Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning How Can You Improve Parallel Structure? We used the following food criteria for our restaurant evaluation: taste, variety, and how it was presented. Gwen will do the following: Meet with Mark After her meeting, give a presentation She will follow up with Accounting Words| Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

26 Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning Parallel Structure Before After Words| Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

27 Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning Revising Your Writing

Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning Developing Logical Paragraphs Words| Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

29 Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning Write a Unified, Coherent Paragraph Words| Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning Write a United, Coherent Paragraph (cont’d) ● It is only a matter of time before diseases like witches' broom and black pot rot endanger the global cocoa supply. ● Increased international shipping has made it a very real possibility, and the consequences of that would be close to catastrophic. ● The only solution to the dwindling cocoa supply is for scientists from all the producing regions to collaborate and find ways to make cocoa trees more resistant. ● Chocolate lovers beware: the seed of love, the cocoa bean, is threatened by disease. ● The witches' broom, a deadly white fungus that deforms the trees, was responsible for almost destroying Brazil's cocoa crop in the early 1990s. Source: Adapted from: Words| Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

31 Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning Revising Your Writing

32 Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning Conveying an Appropriate Tone Words| Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning How Can These Sound More/Less Confident? Words| Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone

34 Copyright © 2015 Cengage Learning Revise for a “You” Attitude and Positive Language Words| Sentences | Paragraphs | Tone