Habit 4 Think Win-Win Freshmen Advisory May, 2015 *** Material is created from 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens

Let’s See What Win-Win is Not…..  Win-Lose – The Totem Pole  When people only want to win and don’t care if others lose. You win, someone else loses.  Lose-Win – The Doormat  When people allow others to win even when it means they lose. You lose, someone else wins.  Lose-Lose – The Downward Spiral  When people believe that if they go down, then others must go down with them. You both lose.

What Win-Win is……  Win-Win – The All-You-Can-Eat Buffet  The belief that everyone can win; there is more than enough to go around for everyone.  It’s not you or me – it’s both of us.  Examples:  Your best friend just got accepted to the college you wanted to attend. You didn’t make it. Although you feel terrible, you are genuinely happy for your friend.  You want to go out for dinner. Your friend wants to see a movie. You jointly decide to rent a movie and pick up food to eat at home.

Triple Up  Place yourself or have your teacher place you in trios.  You will discuss the four ways of looking at situations with your trio.  This is for educational purposes. Please participate and only share stories appropriate for school and personal comfort level.  Let’s have a little fun (you could always make up a situation too).

Win - Lose  Discuss an experience where you practiced or witnessed a win-lose situation or where someone acted in a win- lose way towards you.  How did you feel?  How might have this person behaved differently?

Lose-Win  Discuss an experience where you, someone you know (leaving out names) or a made up situation had a lose- win mentality.  How did/do you feel about it?  Would you or should they have done something differently?  What advice would you give the people in the situation?

Lose-Lose  Discuss some lose-lose examples from history or current news events.  What might one side have done differently?  Is there ever a time when lose-lose might be appropriate?

Win-Win  Each person in your trio should do the following:  Share your definition of Win-Win.  Use examples from your own life.  Complete the following sentences:  It is hardest for me to think win-win when:  It is easiest for me to think win-win when:  When I practice win-win thinking, I enjoy the following benefits:

Can you do more Win-Win thinking?  Sure……  It just takes some work.  Things you can do today:  If you play sports, show sportsmanship. Compliment someone from the opposing team after the match or game, even if you lose.  Do you have an important test coming up soon? If so, form a study group and share your best ideas with each other. You’ll all do better.  The next time someone close to you succeeds, be genuinely happy for them instead of feeling threatened.

Make the Commitment  To practice Win-Win thinking at least once this week.  Think about how it makes you feel.  Think about how it makes others feel.  To talk to adults in your life about their Win-Win experiences.