What has been effective to engage non- resident fathers:  Seek first to understand  Recognize and acknowledge his previous experience with support systems  Help him understand his role in the life of his child and how important it is.  Acknowledge the power in your position along with empowering the father

“That’s the main issue I see with the father’s I work with. Most of them had little or no father in their life and they learned that their vision of a father is not the reality of how to be a father and they don’t know how to make the transition. It’s difficult to get these guys to adapt or use different tools they have never used. I tell the fathers I work with I personally try to do two things as a father myself. 1. The things my father did that were positive and I look back and enjoyed as a kid I continue to do with my kids. 2. The things my father did that bothered me and still sticks with me today, I don’t do them. I work hard to replace them by doing the things with my kids I wished I would have done with my father. (The best thing about this is I give my kids something money can’t buy, Great memories which in time replaces the negative ones with my dad healing us all!)” -Jimmy Tucker, Children’s Services Social Worker

 Ask the father, “How would you like your child to remember you 10 to 15 years from now?”  Remind the father that he is a role model for his child (he may not have had that) …breaking the chain of fatherlessness

Common Challenges to Non-Resident Father Engagement  Expressions of anger  Co-parenting and parental conflict with the mother  Multiple issues: unemployment, housing, court involvement, substance abuse, mental health, domestic violence

Important things to consider in moving forward:  How do we help a father understand that he is important to the well being of his child?  What services do fathers need to address barriers?  What strategies do we use to develop a working relationship with a father?  Understanding the need for a father to share his past experience with support systems.  Understanding male anger.  Explaining the process and expectation for a father and what his role is.  How do we empower fathers by our own actions?

The more complex an issue, the more time and information may be needed to move to the next stage.

There are many ways for your organization to engage fathers in programming. Engaging fathers begins with a holistic approach to becoming father-friendly. Father inclusion should be a priority for the entire organization’s agenda and be stressed in leadership development, program development and community engagement.

Children’s Administration Program Improvement Plan for Father Engagement  State wide father engagement coordination  Regional father engagement program manager  Office father liaisons for advocacy and consultation  Mandatory training on father engagement for all staff  Informational guides for fathers for the child welfare system and juvenile court process  Father engagement and parent education groups facilitated by a veteran father of this system  Community partner training and collaboration

“The primary task of every civilization is to teach the young men to be fathers.” -Margaret Mead

Jonah Idczak (206) Father Engagement Specialist, Children’s Administration Shayne Rochester (425) Snohomish County Parent Advocacy Committee Member Fatherhood Engagement Facilitator ‘Life During CPS’ Facilitator ‘Parent for Parent’ Parent Mentor Perinatal Treatment Services Family Case Manager

Websites Related to Engaging Fathers Websites Related to Engaging Fathers What About the Dads? A website with resources for fathers ‘Including Fathers’ Video National Fatherhood Initiative National Responsible Fathers Clearinghouse US DHHS Administration for Children & Families Fatherhood Resources

Group Discussions In your agency… What are the barriers to working with Fathers? For example, personal barriers? Institutional barriers? Other? What are action steps you can take within your agency to overcome these barriers— in the next month? Over the next year? Over the next 5 years?