© Copyright 2009 DifficultPeople.org & MetaCoach LLC Successful Encounters: Tips for Challenging Situations

© Copyright 2009 DifficultPeople.org & MetaCoach LLC

PATRON INTERACTIONS Angry Patrons What makes a patron angry? Fines or claims returned items New or changed policies Library staff has asked someone to stop doing something Can’t find their hold Inconsistent service Upset with another patron behavior Some personal crisis Anger management issues

PATRON INTERACTIONS What makes patrons challenging? What words describe a difficult patron? What will we do to avoid that patron? AbrasiveIrritatingAggressive AnnoyingDemanding

PATRON INTERACTIONS Why do difficult patrons make us uneasy? Librarians like helping people We feel guilty They are not predictable or logical They are used to drama They reject us What else?

DIFFICULT PATRONS How do we react? What is our response? We avoid them We are quiet or unfriendly We are abrupt/rude We try to be overly-friendly We are stressed – tend to make more mistakes We label them as “problem patrons” We want to get them on their way as fast as possible!

DIFFICULT PATRONS What are some good things about dealing with these patrons? Build up a tolerance for stress Stretch ourselves Learn to think under pressure Leads to a sense of mastery if we “conquer” them

DIFFICULT PATRONS Emotionally Coping with Difficult Patrons Accept your negative emotions – anger, aversion, helplessness It is not personal You cannot change them Use positive Self-Talk Gossiping will not help It is ok to stop helping them & call the police ◦ Patron Code of Behavior

DIFFICULT PATRONS Basic Steps in Handling Difficult Patrons Stay calm Listen ◦ Do not argue ◦ Avoid saying no or quoting policies Empathize ◦ Be respectful Adjust body language

DIFFICULT PATRONS Handling Difficult Patrons as a Manager Again – listen first Consider each situation individually ◦ Each circumstance is unique and requires unique decision-making. Policies and procedures are in place to guide you and offer a frame work

DIFFICULT PATRONS Dealing with it as a Manager – cont’d Consider the ramifications of “giving in” ◦ Does it set a precedent for next time? ◦ What’s the cost?

DIFFICULT PATRONS Dealing with it as a Manager – cont’d Every situation will not necessarily be resolved positively Don’t let a few patrons get you down or cause you to change the way you handle other difficult patrons Consider Banning

MENTALLY CHALLENGED PATRONS What they need Break complex ideas into smaller parts Use concrete terms They are easily stressed Use patience Change is hard

MENTALLY CHALLENGED PATRONS Their requests can be repetitive and questions inappropriate and personal “ That is an inappropriate question.” “That is an inappropriate behavior, and if you don’t stop I’ll have to ask you to leave.” “That is all the help I can give you right now.” Other suggestions that have worked?

PATRONS WITH COMMUNICATION PROBLEMS ◦ Repeat ◦ Verify ◦ Write ◦ Speech issues–  Wait for them to finish  Do not interrupt  If stressed, may need to come back to release tension ◦ Autism

SUCCESSFUL ENCOUNTERS Tips for Challenging Situations Examples of Difficult Situations

SUCCESSFUL ENCOUNTERS Tips for Challenging Situations Leslie Nord – Branch Manager – Lackman/DeSoto ◦ ◦ Jennifer Mahnken – Associate Director for Branch Services ◦ ◦