Treating Trauma and Borderline Issues Effectively Using Inclusive Therapy Bill O’Hanlon

Raimy “Psychotherapy is an undefined technique applied to unspecified cases with unpredictable results. For this technique, rigorous training is required.”

Dissolving Resistance and Ambivalence

Discovering Inclusive Therapy  Including obsessions

Inclusion Level 1 Permission #1 To To You canYou can It’s okayIt’s okay You’re okay ifYou’re okay if

Inclusion Level 1 Permission #2 Not to have to Not to have to You don’t have toYou don’t have to It’s okay if you don’tIt’s okay if you don’t You’re okay if you don’tYou’re okay if you don’t

Discovering Inclusive Therapy  Handily escaping a bind  Protected vulnerability

Inclusion Level 2 Inclusion of seeming opposites You can and not You can and not Opposite polaritiesOpposite polarities Previously incompatible experiences/traitsPreviously incompatible experiences/traits

Inclusion “Do I contradict myself? Very well, then I contradict myself. I am large, I contain multitudes.” –Walt Whitman

Inclusion “Consistency is the last refuge of the unimaginative.” –Oscar Wilde

Inclusion “The only completely consistent people are the dead.” –Aldous Huxley

Inclusion Level 3 Exceptions That’s the way it is, except when it’s not Moments of exceptionMoments of exception Including the opposite possibilityIncluding the opposite possibility Recognizing complexityRecognizing complexity

Inclusion/Exceptions “Nothing is as dangerous as an idea when it is the only one you have.” – Emile Chartier

When to Apply Inclusion  Resistance  Inner conflict  Numbing  Compulsions/obsessions  Ambivalence  Shame/self-devaluing  Dissociation

Where to Apply Inclusion  Injunctions  Binds  Shame  Polarities/inner conflicts  Devaluing/self-criticism  Dissociation  Dis-identification/non-identification  Over-identification

Where to Apply Inclusion  Injunctions  Restraining - Can't, shouldn't, won't  Compelling - Have to, should, will, must  Be, think, feel, know, notice, do, talk about

Undoing Injunctions Determine the injunction Sex is bad. It's not okay to get angry. I have to relax or stop obsessing. Use any or all of the inclusive methods to undo injunctions "It's okay to be connected and sexual." "You don't have to relax. If the obsessions are there, you can just let them be there."

Practice Undoing Injunctions Determine the injunction I have to... I can't.... It's not okay to... I should... People should... Use any or all of the inclusive methods to undo injunctions Permission (to and/or not to have to) Normalizing Valuing of devalued aspects Inclusion of opposites

Where to Apply Inclusion  Binds  Two competing or conflicting injunctions operating at the same time  May be internal or interpersonal/contextual

Practice Undoing Binds Undoing binds "You can perfectly imperfect." "That was terribly accommodating of you." "You can achieve and not be the best." "You can be loved even when you don't achieve."

Where to Apply Inclusion  Polarities/inner conflicts  May not seem like polarities or conflicts to others (i.e., having sexual pleasure and being connected with another person) “Anger and tenderness–my selves. And now I can believe they breathe in me as angels and not as polarities. Anger and tenderness–the spider’s genius. To spin and weave in one moment anywhere. Even from a broken web.” –Adrienne Rich “Anger and tenderness–my selves. And now I can believe they breathe in me as angels and not as polarities. Anger and tenderness–the spider’s genius. To spin and weave in one moment anywhere. Even from a broken web.” –Adrienne Rich “The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function.” –F. Scott Fitzgerald

OXYMORONS Awfully niceExact estimate Found missingSame difference Almost exactlySweet sorrow “Now, then...”Working vacation Terribly pleasedTight slacks Definite maybePretty ugly

Apposition of Opposites Tag Questions Apposition of opposites "You can remember to forget those things that are important to forget and remember to remember those things that are important to remember. Oxymorons Elaborately casual; vicious pleasure; unconcerned vigilance Tag questions and comments "That's the way it is, isn't it?"

Practice Inclusion of Opposites Determine the conflict or polarity I am this (and not that) This but that Swinging between this and that Numbing/compulsive areas Use inclusion of opposites Use "and" Simultaneous experience of two things Oxymoron Apposition of opposites

Harvard Law Under the most rigorously controlled conditions of pressures, temperature, volume, humidity, and other variables, the organism will do as it damn well pleases.

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