Digital Dating Abuse

What is Digital Dating Abuse? Digital dating abuse is the use of texting and social networking to bully, harass, stalk or intimidate a partner. Often this behavior is a form of verbal or emotional abuse.

Digital Dating Video Clip

What are signs of Digital Dating Abuse? -Looks through your phone frequently, checks your texts and pictures -Tells you who you can and can’t talk to -Sends you negative or threatening DM’s, Snap Chats, and/or texts -Sends you inappropriate pictures and demands you send some in return -Steals or insists to be given your passwords

Healthy vs. Unhealthy Relationships Supportive of things I do Encourages me to try new things Understands I have my own life too Tries to resolve conflicts by compromising Respects my privacy Listens to my opinions and feelings Gives me space when I need it Is not very liked by my friends Gets extremely jealous or possessive Accuses me of flirting or cheating Constantly checks up on me Blames me for problems Makes me feel like no one else would want me Threatens to hurt themselves because of me

Why do people abuse? People abuse their partners because they believe they have the right to control other people Abuse is a learned behavior.

Setting Boundaries- What do you feel comfortable with? Is it ok to tag or check in? Do we post our relationship status? Is it ok to friend or follow my friends? When is ok to text me and what is the expectation for when I return it Is it ok to use each other’s devices? Is it ok to post about our relationship? Together you get to decide what feels healthy and what doesn’t work for each of you

Why do people stay in abusive relationships? Fear Believing abuse is normal Embarrassment Low self-esteem Cultural/religious reasons Social/peer pressure

Should we break up? Being scared about feeling lonely after a break up is normal. You will miss your partner a lot after you break up. Make a list to help you remember why you are breaking up. It may take time to adjust to making your own decisions again if you have been controlled by your partner. You may be fearful for your safety if you break up. In that case, make sure you tell friends and parents you are planning to break up with your partner and make a safety plan to do so. Break up over the phone or in public. Don’t try explaining your reasoning to your partner more than once. There is nothing you can say to make them happy. It is unrealistic to fix an abusive relationship. Remember, you can only control your own behavior, not your partner’s

Tips for staying safe after the break up -Talk with friends and family so they can support you -Talk to a school counselor or teacher to adjust your schedule or find ways to keep you safe -Don’t walk alone, wear headphones, or be in isolated areas -Save any threatening or harassing messages your ex sends -If you ever feel in danger call 911

What should I look for in a future partner? -Doesn’t pressure you to do things you don’t want to do -Respects your boundaries -Doesn’t threaten you or make you feel scared -Never puts you down -Listens to your ideas -Is comfortable around your family & friends

https://youtu.be/agDzWqt9TZU