Grieving The Passing of A Resident Loss.  As professionals in aging services, it is inevitable that we will encounter it in our careers.  That aspect of the job has never been easy for me. It is very sad when a resident dies, and when the family and friends of the resident are grieving, it hits home.

Agenda How you may feel What to expect Resources available to you Interacting with family What may help you grieve Helping fellow team members My goal today is to talk to you about the loss or passing of a resident. Share how you may feel, review symptoms of grief, what to expect, resources available to you, ways to interact with the family and to offer some tools on what may help you grieve and how you may be able to help team members grieve.

Resident Death Resident death is a common occurrence in this field In a study done by the Geriatric Nurse, 72% of long term care staff reported experiencing a least one grief related symptom in the past month and the number of symptoms increased with the number of deaths experiences The reality is that resident death is a common occurrence in this field. In a study done by the Geriatric Nurse, 72% of long term care staff reported experiencing a least one grief related symptom in the past month and the number of symptoms increased with the number of deaths experiences. This is difficult because we care about our residents! Source: Nursing Home Practices Following Resident Death: Available here: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4393773/

Grief Symptoms Grief is a normal and natural emotional reaction to loss; you may feel: Sad Depressed Concerned Frustrated Confused Relieved Thankful Empty Nothing There is no right or wrong way to feel after a resident passes. Here are some common responses: You may feel Sad as you were just starting to know the resident or really enjoyed their company Depressed or concerned that that you did something wrong Frustrated at yourself for letting yourself get too attached Confused about what happened as just the other day the resident was doing well, or improving and starting to feel better Relieved as things were getting harder for the resident Thankful as you know the resident was in pain Or Nothing. Maybe you didn’t know the resident very well. Maybe you have gotten used to the passing of residents or maybe you just don’t feel anything and are able to carry on your day with no emotion. All of these feelings are normal. TELL A STORY ABOUT A TIME YOU EXPERIENCED GRIEF AND HOW YOU EXHIBITED YOUR FEELINGS.

The Process – What to Expect INSERT COMMUNITY SPECIFIC INFORMATION Here at COMMUNITY NAME, when a resident passes, you can expect: INSERT COMMUNITY SPECIFIC INFORMATION (provide structure to the post mortem aspects of care and most importantly, include information related to contact with family members, how they will learn of the death, removal of resident items, cleaning of room, new resident moving in…etc.).  

Resources Available to You INSERT INFORMATION ON COMMUNITY RESOURCES (Community rituals (moments of silence in the room or farewell rituals), availability of sympathy cards. Support groups, team member assistance, wellness initiatives...etc.) Everyone grieves differently. There is no right or wrong way to grieve, as long as it does not interfere with the care of our other residents. It is healthy to work through it in whatever way is best for you individually. Please know that we care for you deeply and are willing to support you going through grief. Here are some available resources: INSERT COMMUNITY INFORMATION. All of these tools are healthy and helpful, but there is no “quick fix” and there are times that dealing with loss really does feel draining.

Interacting with Family Be a good listener Allow them to talk Don’t minimize their loss Share memories Refer to the resident by name Family members may stop by to collect personal belongings or to visit and say thank you. Here are some things that may help with this interaction: [review slide]

Helping You Grieve Get enough rest Eat healthy Take time with family and friends Send a card Attend the visitation or funeral Ask for help Speak with a coworker INSERT COMMUNITY SPECIFIC RITUALS Acknowledge and accept your limitations It is sad when a resident dies, and can be challenging when a new resident moves into the room. Grieving may set in. These things may help you – Get enough rest Eat healthy Take time with family and friends Send a card Attend the visitation or funeral INSERT COMMUNITY SPECIFIC RITUALS Acknowledge and accept your limitations

Helping Team Members Grieve Send a card Reminisce Offer a warm hug Offer feedback (“I noticed that you haven’t been yourself these days, are you o.k.?”) Recognize, some may not want to talk Just be there Because we have many staff who care residents, there will be other team members grieving with you. It may be helpful to: Send a card Reminisce Offer a warm hug Offer feedback (“I noticed that you haven’t been yourself these days, are you o.k.?”) Recognize some may not wanting to talk Just be there

Questions or Comments? Coping with resident loss can be very difficult and for many of you this may be your first experience with the death and dying process. What additional questions or concerns do you have? If at any time you have questions or concerns, please do not hesitate to contact me or a member of the leadership team at any time. Your peers may also be very helpful resources.

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