THE SACRAMENTS – Source of our Life in Christ Chapter 7: Matrimony THE SACRAMENTS – Source of our Life in Christ

1. Christ Restored and Elevated Marriage (pp. 180-184) Anticipatory Set Opening Prayer using Genesis 2:18-25. Discuss what this passage tells us about God’s original plan for marriage.

1. Christ Restored and Elevated Marriage (pp. 180-184) BASIC QUESTION What did Jesus Christ do for marriage? KEY IDEAS In prohibiting divorce, Jesus Christ restored to marriage the indissolubility God willed for it from the beginning. In raising marriage to a Sacrament, he provided the graces a baptized couple needs to achieve the ends of marriage in total, self-giving love.

1. Christ Restored and Elevated Marriage (pp. 180-184) Focus Questions What is the second Sacrament of Service? The Sacrament of Holy Matrimony. What is Holy Matrimony? It is a life-long covenant, created by God, which joins a man and woman. What are―or should be―the most fundamental goals of a Christian married couple? To help each other get to Heaven and to raise their children in such a way that they join them there someday. According to CCC 1661, what is the model of how Christian married couples should love one another? The model for how Christian married couples should love one another is the love that Christ had for the Church. The Sacrament of Matrimony gives the couple the grace to love this way. In what sense is God’s plan for each marriage a mystery? The circumstances and events of each marriage are different and in some ways incomprehensible to us.

1. Christ Restored and Elevated Marriage (pp. 180-184) Guided Exercise   A Think/Pair/Share on the following question: How is Adam and Eve’s love for each other like God’s love for himself?

1. Christ Restored and Elevated Marriage (pp. 180-184) Focus Questions What change came over Adam and Eve as a result of their disobedience toward God? The unity between each other and their union with God became disrupted, and rather than loving in a selfless, self-giving way, their love became selfish, seeking the fulfillment of their own desires. What are some of the effects of Original Sin on marriage? Disordered passions and desires, selfishness and self-absorption, and adultery, which resulted in the tolerated practice of divorce. What does Christ say about marriage and divorce in Matthew 19:8? According to God’s original plan, divorce was not allowed. Moses permitted it because of man’s hardness of heart.

1. Christ Restored and Elevated Marriage (pp. 180-184) THE SACRAMENT OF MATRIMONY Focus Questions What does Christ declare about divorce in Mark 10:6-9? God joins together husband and wife. What God has joined, man should not separate. What is the connection between Jesus’ restoration of marriage and the institution of the Sacrament of Matrimony? The Sacrament gives a married couple the grace, or supernatural help, they need to live the way God intended marriage to be in the beginning. Why is grace needed in marriage? Grace is needed to overcome the effects of Original Sin, which can make marriage fall into discord, jealousy, and disunion.

1. Christ Restored and Elevated Marriage (pp. 180-184) Guided Exercise Work with a partner to complete the following graphic to analyze the points made about marriage in CCC 1660. Then answer the question which follows: In regard to the points about marriage in CCC 1660, which are true for all marriages and which are true only of sacramental marriages?

1. Christ Restored and Elevated Marriage (pp. 180-184)

1. Christ Restored and Elevated Marriage (pp. 180-184) Focus Questions How many parties are there in every marriage? Three: a man, a woman, and God. What is the goal of every marriage, whether natural and sacramental? It is the total gift of self to the other spouse. What do the sacramental graces of Matrimony contribute toward this goal? They provide the strength to make the gift of self possible.

1. Christ Restored and Elevated Marriage (pp. 180-184) Closure Write a paragraph summarizing the Sacrament of Matrimony.

1. Christ Restored and Elevated Marriage (pp. 180-184) Homework Assignment Reading: Pp. 184-187, through “THE PROCREATIVE ASPECT OF MARITAL LOVE.” Questions: Questions: 1-6. Workbook: 1-9. Practical Exercises: 1 & 2.

1. Christ Restored and Elevated Marriage (pp. 180-184) Alternative Assessment   Based on the graphic from the Workbook (p. 108, q. 4) work with a partner to answer the following question: We know that God is a Trinity of Persons. We also know that God created man in his image and likeness, and that marriage was created by God. How do these two realities reflect one another?

2. The Unitive and Procreative Dimensions of Marital Love (pp. 184-187) Anticipatory Set Brainstorm details about the planning and celebration of weddings. Which of these are purely human customs that vary from place to place and which ones have to do with the nature of marriage and so are universal? In this lesson, we will learn about a number of aspects of marriage that are universal.

2. The Unitive and Procreative Dimensions of Marital Love (pp. 184-187) BASIC QUESTIONS What is marital love? What is the conjugal act and its two purposes? What is the effect of denying the meaning of the conjugal act? KEY IDEAS Marital love is the expression of the exclusive, life-long covenant between a man and woman, willed by God, which involves the whole person, body and soul, and which is ordered to the procreation and education of children. It is one of the most powerful expressions of divine and human love on earth. The conjugal act is the highest expression of marital love, and it has two intrinsic and inseparable purposes: the unitive and the procreative. The unitive purpose is the one-flesh expression of love between husband and wife. The procreative purpose is the generation of new life and its education. Denying either the unitive or procreative meanings of sexual intercourse is gravely sinful. Artificial birth control denies the procreative meaning of the conjugal act, is gravely sinful, and opens the way for a variety of other evils.

2. The Unitive and Procreative Dimensions of Marital Love (pp. 184-187) Focus Questions What is God, according to St. John’s Gospel? God is love. What is God’s greatest wish? To give himself entirely to us and for us to give ourselves entirely to him, in love. How is the Sacrament of Matrimony an example of limitless love? In the Sacrament of Matrimony, the spouses give themselves completely, body and soul, in unending fidelity. What does conjugal mean? It means to join together.

2. The Unitive and Procreative Dimensions of Marital Love (pp. 184-187) Focus Questions What is the conjugal act? Also called the marital act, it is sexual intercourse between husband and wife. What is the relationship between the marital bond and the marital act? The marital bond is not complete until the marriage has been consummated, that is, until the couple performs the conjugal act. Extension: A marriage that is not consummated can be annulled for that very reason. What is the supernatural effect of the conjugal act? Each time the spouses express their love in the conjugal act, they renew their marital covenant and receive graces from God to love each other and God more. Why is the marital act eminently human? It is an act of human persons that incorporates the mind, the will and the body.

2. The Unitive and Procreative Dimensions of Marital Love (pp. 184-187) Focus Questions What are the two aspects of the marital act in marriage? The unitive and procreative. What is the unitive aspect of the conjugal act? It is the complete and exclusive love between the spouses that unites them body and soul. How does premarital sex violate the unitive aspect of marriage? It is fraudulent because the couple have not completely given themselves to the other by uniting in a love-long covenant. How does adultery violate the unitive aspect of marriage? It is fraudulent because it expresses a physical and spiritual unity that does not exist. It also violates the sacred bond of marriage which (at least) one of the adulterers has with another person.

2. The Unitive and Procreative Dimensions of Marital Love (pp. 184-187) Focus Questions Why is the possibility of taking on the duty of educating children inherent in every act of sexual intercourse? Extension: Any act of sexual intercourse could result in the procreation of a child and human children require a long and careful upbringing or else the child will go badly astray. What is the best environment for a child to be born into? Extension: A marriage in which husband and wife love each other completely and resolutely carry out their responsibilities toward the child which, with God’s help, they have brought into the world. How does God involve the married couple in his own creative work? Husband and wife are co-creators, with God, of a new human being.

2. The Unitive and Procreative Dimensions of Marital Love (pp. 184-187) Guided Exercise Complete the following graphic to show how true love always bears fruit.

2. The Unitive and Procreative Dimensions of Marital Love (pp. 184-187)

2. The Unitive and Procreative Dimensions of Marital Love (pp. 184-187) Guided Exercise   People seem very confused about the purpose of human sexuality today. The Church says it has two purpose, the union of husband and wife in intimate love and the procreation and education of children. A Think/Pair/Write/Share on the following questions: What is the biological purpose of the sex organs and the reproductive systems of men and women? What is the biological purpose of homosexual acts?

2. The Unitive and Procreative Dimensions of Marital Love (pp. 184-187) Focus Questions What does the Church teach about every conjugal act? Every conjugal act must be open to new life. Why does the Church teach that artificial birth control is wrong? Artificial birth control renders the conjugal act sterile. When artificial birth control is used, the couple, by a positive act of the will, intentionally removes the procreative meaning of the marital act, thereby corrupting its meaning. By intentionally withholding the complete gift of one’s entire being and by refusing to accept the gift of the other in his or her totality as a human person, the couple distorts both the unitive and procreative meanings for which the marital act was intended.

2. The Unitive and Procreative Dimensions of Marital Love (pp. 184-187) Focus Questions How serious is the sin of separating the unitive and procreative meanings of the conjugal act? It is gravely serious. What is Humanae vitae? It is the 1968 encyclical of Pope Paul VI that reaffirmed the Church’s constant teaching on artificial birth control. What did Paul VI warn would be results of accepting artificial birth control? Adultery would become more common, accompanied by a weakening of the family, and divorce . The general level of sexual morality would be lowered. There would be a dramatic increase in sexual promiscuity. Pre-marital sex would become widespread. Respect for the human person and especially of women would be diminished as the body would be viewed as an object of selfish enjoyment. Governments would impose artificial birth control on segments of the population. All these predicted bad effects occurred.

2. The Unitive and Procreative Dimensions of Marital Love (pp. 184-187) Closure Write a paragraph explaining as simply as you can the two purposes of the marriage act.

2. The Unitive and Procreative Dimensions of Marital Love (pp. 184-187) Homework Assignment Reading: Pp. 187-191 (Through “MARRIAGES TO NON-CATHOLICS”). Questions: Questions: 7-9. Workbook: 10-18. Practical Exercises: 3 & 4.

2. The Unitive and Procreative Dimensions of Marital Love (pp. 184-187) Alternative Assessment Free write, speculating on how the widespread adoption of artificial birth control in the 1960s has contributed to an increase in premarital sex, adultery, voluntary abortion, forced sterilizations and abortions, and gay rights.

3. NFP & the Conditions for Marriage (pp. 187-191) Anticipatory Set   The Ten Commandments and Christ call every person to live chastity. How can people in various states in life practice chastity? Single Married Clergy

3. NFP & the Conditions for Marriage (pp. 187-191) BASIC QUESTIONS What is NFP? What kind of preparation should a couple have before marriage? What are some of the reasonable requirements for a valid Sacramental marriage? KEY IDEAS For serious reasons, spouses may morally practice periodic abstinence (NFP) to avoid conception. Marriage requires preparation to understand one’s responsibilities. The Church has stipulated requirements for a valid marriage, which include free consent, proper rites, and lack of impediments.

3. NFP & the Conditions for Marriage (pp. 187-191) Focus Questions Does the nature of marital love demand that every marital act have conception as its primary or explicit intention? No. Extension: The spouses do not have to “think” about conception occurring. They must simply engage in the marital act according to its nature, that is, as a gift of self that is open to procreation. What is the general attitude toward children that God expects from Christian spouses? Generosity.

3. NFP & the Conditions for Marriage (pp. 187-191) Focus Questions What are some serious reasons that spouses might have to postpone having children? The physical or psychological condition of either spouse, the particular needs of the family and existing children, and the family’s financial situation. What can spouses do if, for serious reasons, they believe they should not have a child at this time? They can practice Natural Family Planning. What is Natural Family Planning (NFP)? NFP includes several methods in which the wife’s fertile times can be very accurately predicted. The couple abstains from the conjugal act during the fertile times and may have recourse to the conjugal act during the wife’s infertile times.

3. NFP & the Conditions for Marriage (pp. 187-191) Guided Exercise Complete the following graphic to articulate how artificial birth control and NFP are similar and different.

3. NFP & the Conditions for Marriage (pp. 187-191)

3. NFP & the Conditions for Marriage (pp. 187-191) CELEBRATING THE SACRAMENT OF MATRIMONY How is the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony similar to the Sacrament of Holy Orders? Both are Sacraments of Service, both entail a specific vocation, and both require preparation. What is the domestic church? Each Christian family is a domestic church, a place in which the spouses and their children receive grace and develop their spiritual lives. Why do all dioceses have marriage preparation programs? Dioceses have marriage preparation programs so that couples will understand the responsibilities they are undertaking. A second reason is to provide time so that each can see whether the person he is engaged to is really the one he wants to give himself to for the rest of his life.

3. NFP & the Conditions for Marriage (pp. 187-191) Focus Questions Why does the Code of Canon Law detail conditions for getting married? To ensure the validity of the Sacrament and the good of those seeking marriage. Why is the age requirement important? Extension: People are able to have children long before they are old enough to be responsible for caring for them. Why is it important for each spouse to be free from coercion when they marry? Extension: Every covenant must be freely entered into for it to be valid. God wants our free cooperation with him.

3. NFP & the Conditions for Marriage (pp. 187-191) Focus Questions Why is it appropriate that a person suffering from a serious mental illness not be able to marry? Such a person would not understand the rights and duties of marriage that he or she is obliging himself or herself to. Why is it good to receive Confirmation, Reconciliation, and the Eucharist in preparing for marriage? All three Sacraments give graces to the persons preparing from Matrimony. Confirmation gives one the graces of Christian maturity and Reconciliation takes away sins that might weigh one down.

3. NFP & the Conditions for Marriage (pp. 187-191) Guided Exercise Choose one of the points under REQUIREMENTS OF A VALID MARRIAGE and free write on it, explaining what it is and why it is a reasonable requirement.

3. NFP & the Conditions for Marriage (pp. 187-191) MARRIAGES TO NON-CATHOLICS Focus Questions What is a mixed marriage? The marriage of a Catholic and a baptized non-Catholic Christian. What is disparity of cult? It is the marriage of a Catholic and a non-baptized person. What are the requirements for a dispensation to allow a Catholic to marry in a mixed marriage or in a marriage of disparity of cult? The Catholic party declares he will do everything in his power to remove the dangers of his falling away from the faith and to raise his children in the Church. The other party is to be informed of these promises and both parties are to be educated about the essential ends and properties of marriages, which neither party can disregard. Finally, the marriage should take place in the Catholic Church.

3. NFP & the Conditions for Marriage (pp. 187-191) Closure Write a paragraph explaining why artificial birth control is a breaking of the marital covenant whereas the use of NFP is not.

3. NFP & the Conditions for Marriage (pp. 187-191) Homework Assignment Reading: Pp. 191-194 (through “THE WEDDING CEREMONY”). Questions: Questions: 10-12. Workbook: 19-29. Practical Exercise 5.

3. NFP & the Conditions for Marriage (pp. 187-191) Alternative Assessment Free write on why mixed marriages and disparity of cult, without careful attention, would tend to result in marital discord or loss of faith.

4. Celebration of the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony (pp. 191-194) Anticipatory Set What are the meanings of the symbols of the crowns of the Eastern rite and the rings of the Latin rite in the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony?

4. Celebration of the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony (pp. 191-194) BASIC QUESTIONS What is the matter, form, and minister of Holy Matrimony? What is the connection between the Eucharist and Matrimony? KEY IDEAS The matter of the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony is the spouses themselves. The form is the public vows the spouses make and the ratification of those vows when the spouses consummate the marriage act. The minister is the spouses themselves who mutually confer the Sacrament on each other. The Sacrament of Matrimony is most fittingly celebrated within the context of Holy Mass because the Mass is the perfect expression of God’s love, a love which the spouses are called to live toward each other and the children God may bless them with.

4. Celebration of the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony (pp. 191-194) Focus Question What is the matter of the Sacrament of Matrimony? The matter is the words the spouses exchange expressing their commitment and their bodies given to each other in the consummation of their commitment in the conjugal act. What is the form of the Sacrament of Matrimony? It is the vows the spouses exchange publicly and the consummation of their marriage. What is a vow? It is a solemn promise made to God in the presence of witnesses.

4. Celebration of the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony (pp. 191-194) Focus Question What does ratification mean? It means the couple’s vows must be made in the presence of an ordained minister of the Church (deacon, priest, or bishop) and two other witnesses. How is a ratified and consummated married dissolved? Only by the death of one of the spouses. Who is the minister of the Sacrament of Matrimony? The spouses are: they administer the Sacrament to each other.

4. Celebration of the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony (pp. 191-194) Guided Exercise   Have the students perform a paragraph shrink on the paragraph beginning, “The celebration of marriage,” including the point from CCC 1621. THE RITE OF MATRIMONY A Think/Pair/Share on the following question: On what four areas does the priest publicly question the couple to ensure that they intend to enter a valid sacramental marriage?

4. Celebration of the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony (pp. 191-194) Closure Write a paragraph explaining the matter, form, and minister of Holy Matrimony.

4. Celebration of the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony (pp. 191-194) Homework Assignment   Reading: Pp. 194-198. Questions: Questions: 13-16. Workbook: 30-42.

4. Celebration of the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony (pp. 191-194) Alternative Assessment Write for five minutes on appropriate dress and behavior during a Wedding Mass and the reasons why.

5. Lights and Shadows in Marriage (pp. 194-198) Anticipatory Set   It is easy to see that marriage is a difficult undertaking, yet many young persons assume their marriage will be perfect. Without giving up on the ideal of Christian marriage, an ideal which is certainly possible due to God’s grace, how do you think you can prepare now for a strong marriage in the future?

5. Lights and Shadows in Marriage (pp. 194-198) BASIC QUESTIONS How is the vocation to marriage a call to holiness? What is the domestic church? What are the sins against marriage? What happens in the situations in which a validly married Catholic divorces and remarries? What is an annulment?   KEY IDEAS Marriage is a vocation from God to pursue holiness through life with one’s spouse and children. The family is a domestic church in which children learn to live their Catholic faith. There are many sins that violate the unitive or procreative purposes of marriage. The remarriage of a spouse who is already validly married is a serious sin. Some spouses are called to heroic sacrifice in difficult situations. In some instances, separation or even legal divorce may be appropriate. An annulment is a judgment by the Church that a valid marriage never occurred.

5. Lights and Shadows in Marriage (pp. 194-198) Focus Questions What is a vocation? It is God’s call to an individual about what he wants him to do with his life. What vocation does every person have? The call to holiness. What are the three traditional vocations the Church has recognized? Priesthood and the Religious (or consecrated) Life, Marriage, and the celibate (or single) life.

5. Lights and Shadows in Marriage (pp. 194-198) Focus Questions What is the special calling that God gives to most individuals? The vocation to marriage. What is the vocation to marriage? It is the call to make a complete gift of self to one’s spouse and to one’s children. What are some of the everyday situations in married life that spouses are called to sanctify? The marriage union, the care and education of children, the effort to provide for the needs of the family and its security and development, the relationships with other persons who make up the community the family finds itself in.

5. Lights and Shadows in Marriage (pp. 194-198) THE DOMESTIC CHURCH Focus Question Why is the Christian home called the domestic church? It is a community of grace and prayer, and a school of human virtues and Christian charity for the children.

5. Lights and Shadows in Marriage (pp. 194-198) Guided Exercise   Based on the paragraphs beginning, “Children will learn” and “It is in the home,” work with a partner to do a bullet point summary of the lessons children will learn in the Christian home from their parents’ good example.

5. Lights and Shadows in Marriage (pp. 194-198) SINS AGAINST MARRIAGE Guided Exercise: a mini-lecture on the sins against marriage and chastity. The main sins against marriage are divorce, adultery, artificial birth control, artificial insemination, and in vitro fertilization. The main sins against chastity are impure thoughts and desires, masturbation, premarital sex, oral or anal intercourse, homosexual acts, and bestiality. Persons with homosexual inclinations deserve our respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Same-sex attraction is objectively disordered but not in itself morally culpable, while homosexual acts are.

5. Lights and Shadows in Marriage (pp. 194-198) Guided Exercise Read the Supplementary Reading on page 201 (“Georges and Pauline Vanier”). Free write on how the Vanier’s self-giving within marriage became a legacy for service beyond the family. Discuss ways you might live lives of service once you reach adulthood.

5. Lights and Shadows in Marriage (pp. 194-198) Guided Exercise Complete the following graphic to identify whether the sin against marriage is a sin against the unitive or procreative ends of marriage (or some other sin). *These sins often also include some form of artificial birth control. If so, they also involve sins against procreation.

5. Lights and Shadows in Marriage (pp. 194-198)

5. Lights and Shadows in Marriage (pp. 194-198) MORE ON ARTIFICIAL BIRTH CONTROL Guided Exercise Read the Supplementary Reading on page 200 (“More on Artificial Birth Control”). Write about the difference between what the advocates of contraception promised would be the result of their free availability and the actual results we have experienced. Discuss what difference, if any, there is between the sex act of a married couple who uses contraception and sex between a same-sex couple. Discuss how contraception has contributed to the move for same-sex marriage as a civil right.

5. Lights and Shadows in Marriage (pp. 194-198) Focus Questions What should spouses in difficult marriages do? They should seek all the human and supernatural help available to work through their difficulties. What are some unfortunate situations in which a separation or even civil divorce might be appropriate? Situations involving physical abuse, alcoholism, psychological problems, or unfaithfulness. Does either a separation or legal divorce mean the spouses are no longer validly married in the eyes of God? No. They are still married. What are the obligations and prohibitions for a person who has entered a second marriage while still validly married to their first spouse? They may not receive the Sacraments, except Reconciliation. They still have the obligation to educate their children in the Faith. To be able to return to receiving the Eucharist, they must commit to a life of complete continence and then go to Confession.

5. Lights and Shadows in Marriage (pp. 194-198) Focus Questions What is the annulment process? It is the investigation by the Church about whether a valid marriage took place. How is an annulment different from a divorce? An annulment is a declaration that no valid marriage ever took place. Divorce seeks to dissolve a valid marriage. What are some situations that invalidate a marriage? If one of the partners was forced into the union; if one of the partners never intended to have children; if one of the partners was suffering from an unrecognized mental illness that made consent impossible. If the Church declares that no valid sacramental marriage ever took place, can the parties get married to another person? Yes.

5. Lights and Shadows in Marriage (pp. 194-198) Closure   Use CCC 1665 (p. 206) as the basis of a paragraph explaining what the Church teaches in regard to validly married Catholic spouses who have divorced and remarried outside the Church. 1665 The remarriage of persons divorced from a living, lawful spouse contravenes the plan and law of God as taught by Christ. They are not separated from the Church, but they cannot receive Eucharistic communion. They will lead Christian lives especially by educating their children in the faith.

5. Lights and Shadows in Marriage (pp. 194-198) Homework Assignment Reading: Pp. 199-201. Questions: Questions: 17-26. Workbook: 43-56.

5. Lights and Shadows in Marriage (pp. 194-198) Alternative Assessment Free write on ways you might make your future home a domestic church where the call to holiness can be heard and lived.

The End