Interpersonal Skills LO 2 2.1, 2.2, 2.3

Homework Review I’m really sorry you seem to be having a bad day How did you think it was going to go? What was the experience like? Comments/Feedback

Try and see the world through another’s eyes: you may be surprised at what you learn

What causes homelessness s

Self Concept Affect Communication Self concept and self esteem act as filters in every interaction with others They determine how you approach, respond, to and interpret messages They affect your – sensitivity to others – Overall expectations of a situation – Usual communication style

Partner Exercise Pick a partner Describe yourself in one word – don’t say it out loud Your partner is also going to pick one word that describes you Now compare them-discuss how you came to pick that descriptive WORD We will debrief as a large group

Traits which reflect your own self-concepts Moods and feelings: happy, worried Appearance: how does a bad hair day affect you? Social Traits: Shy, outgoing Talents: Gardner, Musician, Organized Intellect: Make quick decisions, current events, math Beliefs: Spirituality, values about family, education, etc. Roles: Mother, Employee, Friend, Student Physical Condition: How are about aging?, Fitness Levels

Communication and Self Concept Have a Direct Correlation Well developed communication skills are associated with: – Self confidence – Skill in relating to others – Satisfying & successful relationships – Personal power – Accurate and consistent decision making – Low stress levels – Healthy self concept

Communication and Self Concept Have a Direct Correlation Poor communication skills are associated with: – Lack of self confidence – Poor relationship skills – Unsatisfying relationships – Lack of personal power – High stress levels – Inaccurate and inconsistent decision making – Unhealthy self concept

15 Minute Exercise Using the sheet provided,describe your traits in relation to your self concept This is for your reference only Do you see any traits you want to explore further? How might you put forward a plan of action for yourself?

Factors that Shape the Self- Concept Most researchers agree that you are not born with a self concept It is thought that there is a physical recognition of self before any other development occurs

Factors that Shape the Self- Concept Development of self-concept is fairly dependent on interacting with others Children have no other frame of reference and tend to accept both negative and positive evaluations by powerful adults Influences can be verbal and non verbal

Factors that Shape the Self- Concept As children grow, significant others also play a part in shaping their self concept Talents, skills resilience and age also play a powerful role in self concept Sometimes we ‘Jones’ about our selves and if we fail to achieve the goal self esteem may falter

How Identities are Managed Identity is managed in three ways: – Manner plays a part and includes your words and actions – Appearance- The same at work as at class? – Choice of setting: cars, cleanliness of house You can also manage you identity through non verbal ways: thank you notes- handwritten, , special paper

Characteristics of Self Worth High Self WorthLow Self Worth Higher expectations for solving problemsMore sensitive to criticism Think more highly of othersMore critical of others More likely to gracefully accept praiseBelieve they are not respected More comfortable being watchedExpect to be rejected Likely to admit strengths and weaknessesDo not like to be watched Comfortable interacting with self assured peopleFeel threatened by self assured folks Expect others to accept them as they areExpect to lose when competing Likely to seek opportunities for skill developmentoverly responsive to compliments Evaluate overall behavior +evaluate overall behavior as inferior

Self-Fulfilling Prophecy What you believe about yourself comes true because you expect it to come true, and you act in ways to make sure it does This causes you to have to deal with lack of knowledge in the subject and your low self expectations

Self-Fulfilling Prophecy Research has shown that self fulfilling prophecies influence communication a great deal Your feelings about your own competence are just as great an influence on your own behavior as the expectations ( high or low) of others

Types of Self Fulfilling Prophecy Self imposed: your own expectations influence your behavior Other-imposed: Others verbal or non verbal expectations We communicate Those expectations with various cues People tend to respond To those cues by adjusting their behavior to match them The result is that the expectation becomes true This creates a self fulfilling prophecy We form expectations of people or events

Perceptions hold on communication Perception is the process of selecting, organizing and integrating sensory data in a way that enables you to make sense of the world (Gamble and Gamble. 1999, p.177)

Perceptions hold on communication We explain and give meaning to what we experience, particularly if you are watching the behaviors of others We also may draw conclusions that may or may not be accurate and often your communication is based on these perceptions

Remember, our perceptions are built You look at the world in a unique way because of your: – Physical location – Interests, personal desires, attitudes and values – Life experiences – Physical condition – Psychological state Remember, everything you perceive is affected by your self concept

Levels of Perception When you form your perceptions of others, you function at three levels: – You observe the facts: a true statement based on what you heard, saw or experienced in the situation – You make inferences : conclusions you form based on limited information available – Form judgments: based on your opinions about a situation or person, which in turn is based on your values, beliefs, biases, and prejudices

Perceptions hold on communication Inferences and judgments are caused by the way you interpret your experiences after your senses take in the perceived data By trying to: maintain professional boundaries Taking careful accurate notes Be alert for non verbal clues Keep an open mind

Writing exercise 15 minutes Think about a recent interpersonal problem Describe your perception of the problem What was the other person’s perception What role did perception play in adding to or resolving the problem?

Perceptions What do you see