Personal Power 4: State of mind and total self control

 Do you know what you really want? Money, fame, relationship, … ?  Actually what we really want are not like those. What we really want are the feelings we get when we have those things.  It can also be called a change of state (of mind).  For example, do we want money because we like pieces of paper with a famous but dead person or some cute children?  We want money because we want the feeling of security or respect when we have money.  Practice: Think of something you want, and discover the kind of feelings you truly want.

 Have you ever performed extremely well or extremely poorly on the same thing?  What makes the dramatic difference in your behavior?  Answer: State of mind  Learn to manage your state of mind is tremendously important!  Is “how you feel” determined by things happening to you?  How you feel is determined by how you direct your mind at that moment.  Remember the formula E + R = O. You can always control your response and state of mind to have better outcome.

 Once you understand this and take the responsibility, you will control your life at a whole new level.  What is the price of not managing your state?  A lot of superstars (who should have great lives) killed themselves because they did not manage their state of mind.  Some other people (who seem to have miserable lives) know how to manage their state of mind and create unbelievable results.  You can blame everyone in the world for your failure, or you can get even stronger after learning from the feedback if you know how to manage your state of mind.  Look at people with accidents yet thrive in their lives. You have no excuse not to manage your state of mind.

 Control our state of mind by: 1. control the physical body; 2. control the mental focus.  First, let’s control the physical body.  Mind and body are not isolated parts, they are strongly connected!  Practice: How would you walk or breathe when you feel totally depressed or extremely happy?  Actually it takes EFFORT to change the facial expression and physical movements in order to express a certain feeling.  This is especially true when you try to “fake” some feelings.

 Practice: Try to stand tall, look up, and breathe fully, and at the same time try to feel depressed.  Can you do it? You must have got schizophrenia if you can do it.  This practice shows that our bodies also sends strong messages to our brains.  Our feelings are controlled not just by what we think, but also by how we move.  If positive thinking does not work in making you feel good, BEHAVE positively!  Researches show that people who exercise regularly usually don’t get depressed

 A lot of people feel good in smoking not because of the smell but because smoking changes the way they breathe and consequently changes the way they feel.  Movie: shall we dance, take the lead, dirty dancing  The point is, any change in your physical body creates immediate change in your feelings.  Emotion can be created by motion.  Changing your motions is the fastest way to change your emotions.  Dancer are clear about this because they change movement rhythms to change the audience’ feelings.

 Start using this concept now!  Olympic athletes move their bodies in a certain way to make sure they feel great and unstoppable before a competition.  If your state of mind or readiness can be measured from 0 (dead) to 10 (totally unstoppable), which level are you at now?  If you want to succeed, which level should be at for most of the time?  Which level were you at before coming to this class? And what about now?  Develop your own “Power Move” which is a certain gesture or movement which makes you feel powerful instantly.

 Practice: Walk around the room and move in a powerful and unstoppable way. Find out what kind of gestures and movements you have. Next, walk in the state of sorrow or depression. And then try to move in your powerful way and see whether you feel good instantly.  Also, practice this several times on your seat.  This is not just a fun experience. In your life, how important is it if you can switch from being bored and tired to totally empowered?  Discover the “buttons” on your body to make you feel great instantly!

 Changing your breathing pattern is also a quick way to change your emotional state.  Exercise on changing your facial expression.  Your dieting and sleeping habits also greatly affect your emotional states.