1. Self-Help Book Project Family Sociology: FCST-342-02 April 19, 2011 Created by: LAUREN SCHULTES- schultesl1@mail.montclair.edu MEGAN SULLIVAN- sullivanm1@mail.montclair.edu ZAREEN THOMAS-BELL- thomasbellz1@mail.montclair.edu

2. Summary Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man, was written by Steve Harvey to let women inside the mindset of a man and to understand how men think when it comes to relationships. Topics the book focuses on include: 1. What drives men 2. How they feel about love in comparison to women 3. The role of men in relationships

3. Thesis The objective of this book is to provide women with a relationship guide about how men think and how to go about finding “the one.” It also gives reasons why Steve Harvey believes women should think like men.

4. The Topic in Context From 2005-2009, out of the total households in the US, 13,992,639 were female householders with no husband present. (U.S. Census Bureau, 2005-2009) In the US, an estimate of 27.7% are women who were never married. (U.S. Census Bureau, 2005-2009)

5. The Author Steve Harvey is an actor, “writer”, producer, television and radio comedian. He gives advice about relationships and community concerns on his show, “The Steve Harvey Show.” He has another book called, Straight Talk; No Chaser: How to Find, Keep, and Understand a Man. He is best known as the “King of Comedy.” Steve Harvey, along with his wife Marjorie, partake in philanthropy under the Steve and Marjorie Harvey Foundation.

6. Data…Is Steve Serious? According to eHarmony.com, “So when I sat down to write this book, I wrote it from the standpoint of what I was an expert at and from where I had the greatest source of information—and that was all of my friends who happen to be men. They are from all walks of life—ball players, actors, truck drivers, insurance salesman, guys I worked in the factory with when I was at Ford Motors, and my father...it is just how we are. It is in our DNA, so it is valuable information for a women to gain” (Harvey, 2009).

7. This graph supports the idea that people are looking to get married. Steve Harvey wrote this book to guide women on how to find a husband.

8. Although Harvey’s intentions were aligned with societal norms, his “facts” are not reputable. As shown in the table, both men and women put emotional pleasure over physical pleasure in maintaining a marriage. ( Sprecher, S., & Toro-Morn, M., 2002)

9. Quality of Data “A Study of Men and Women From Different Sides of Earth to Determine if Men are From Mars and Women are From Venus in Their Beliefs About Love and Romantic Relationships” is a reputable source from the journal Sex Roles. It contains a regional sample comprised of North American and Chinese men and women. Susan Sprecher and Maura Toro-Morn collected the data shown in the article.

10. Results…Steve is Wrong The data presented in the article goes against what Steve Harvey presents throughout his book. He continuously emphasizes how different a woman’s love is from a man’s love. Steve Harvey says how men will never open up emotionally in a relationship.

11. Helpful? No, this “self help” book is not at all helpful. Steve Harvey does not take any data from scholarly sources and simply relies on his own experiences with friends, his own relationships, and callers from his television show. He generalizes what he has seen to all men. It seems that this would only lower women’s standards and expectations of men.

12. Inadequate Training Steve Harvey has no background in psychology or sociology. He is known for his work as a comedian and relies on his personal experiences to get the material for his books. He never once mentions a reputable study or statistic in Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man.

13. Discussion & Conclusion All in all, Steve Harvey does not have reliable sources of his general arguments. He does not once mention a journal or Census statistic. He comes right out and says that his “sample” is only of himself, his friends, and people who call into his show. If this book had scholarly sources then it could be helpful for the large amount of single women since, as shown through research, most seek to get married.

14. Recommendations in the Revision of This Book… Steve Harvey should do sociological research through a random sample. The research shows that men and women are not that different. Steve Harvey gives many examples in the book about women wanting an emotional attachment, whereas men do not want that same attachment. Overall he seems to list more differences between men and women than similarities.

15. Exam Questions 1. According to the graph about marriage, what is NOT true? a. Most people think it is extremely important to have a good marriage and family life. b. Most people believe it is better to get married than stay single. c. Most people do not think it is important to have a good marriage and family life. d. Most people expect to get married.

16. 2. Which of the following is a reliable source? a. Your friend b. A caller into a radio show c. Steve Harvey d. A peer reviewed journal

17. 3. Which of the following in NOT an example of “doing gender”? a. A woman being the provider while the man stays at home to take care of the children. b. A man being the sole provider. c. A stay-at-home mother who stays home and does all the housework and childcare. d. A woman changing her occupational aspirations from being a doctor to being a nurse.

18. References (Graph from Family Sociology Marriage PowerPoint) 2002 National Survey of Family Growth & 2006 Monitoring the Future Survey eHarmony staff. Steve harvey: act like a lady, think like a man. Retrieved from http://advice.eharmony.com/dating/expert-advice/steve-harvey-act-like-a-lady-think-like-a-man Sprecher, S., & Toro-Morn, M. (2002). A study of men and women from different sides of Earth to determine if men are from Mars and women are from Venus in their beliefs about love and romantic relationships. Sex Roles, 46(5/6), 131-147. U.S. Census Bureau, American Community Survey. (2005-2009). Households and families Retrieved from http://factfinder.census.gov/servlet/STTable?_bm=y&- geo_id=01000US&-qr_name=ACS_2009_5YR_G00_S1101&- ds_name=ACS_2009_5YR_G00_&-redoLog=false U.S. Census Bureau, American Community Survey. (2005-2009). Percent of women 15 years and over who were never married Retrieved from http://factfinder.census.gov/servlet/ThematicMapFramesetServlet?_bm=y&-geo_id=01000US&- tm_name=ACS_2009_5YR_G00_M00643&-ds_name=ACS_2009_5YR_G00_&- _MapEvent=displayBy&-_dBy=040&-redoLog=false tm_config=|b=50|l=en|t=5309|zf=0.0|ms=thm_def|dw=1.9557697048764706E7|dh=1.4455689123E7|dt=gov.c ensus.aff.domain.map.LSRMapExtent|if=gif|cx=- 1159354.4733499996|cy=7122022.5|zl=10|pz=10|bo=|bl=|ft=350:349:335:389:388:332:331|fl=403:381:204:380:369: 379:368|g=01000US|ds=ACS_2009_5YR_G00_|sb=49|tud=false|db=040|mn=21.4|mx=52.3|cc=1|cm=1|cn=5|cb=| um=Percent|pr=1|th=ACS_2009_5YR_G00_M00643|sf=N|sg=