1. . The Pornography Epidemic in America ©2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D.

2. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Definitions of Pornography Clinical Definition Any image that leads a person to use another person for their own sexual pleasure. It is devoid of relationship, love and intimacy. It can be highly addictive.

3. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Definitions of Pornography Catechism of the Catholic Church Pornography consists in removing real or simulated sexual acts from the intimacy of the partners, in order to display them deliberately to third parties. It offends against chastity because it perverts the conjugal act, the intimate giving of spouses to each other. Cont.

4. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Definitions of Pornography Catechism of the Catholic Church - cont. It does grave injury to the dignity of its participants, since each one becomes an object of base pleasure and illicit profit for others. It immerses all who are involved in the illusion of a fantasy world. It is a grave offense. Civil authorities should prevent the production and distribution of pornographic materials. CCC, 2354

5. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Pornography Time Statistics Every second - $3,075.64 is being spent on pornography Every second - 28,258 Internet users are viewing pornography Every second - 372 Internet users are typing adult search terms into search engines Every 39 minutes: a new pornographic video is being created in the United States

6. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Revenues The pornography industry earns over $97 Billion every year $13 Billion comes from the USA Earns more than the top technology companies combined: Microsoft, Google, Amazon, EBay, Yahoo, Apple, Netflix and EarthLink. Child Pornography generates $3 Billion

7. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Internet Pornography 4.2 million pornographic websites 420 million pornographic WebPages 68 million daily pornographic search engine requests – Google 25% of all search engine requests 4.5 billion average daily pornographic emails 100,000 child porn websites worldwide

8. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Adult Internet Porn Statistics Men admitting to accessing pornography at work: 20% US adults who regularly visit Internet pornography websites: 40 million Promise Keeper men who viewed pornography in last week: 53%

9. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Adult Internet Porn Statistics Christians who said pornography is a major problem in the home: 47% Adults admitting to Internet sexual addiction: 10% Breakdown of male/female visitors to pornography sites: 72% male - 28% female

10. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. How Porn Enters the Home Television Computer/Internet Video Games Cell Phones Print Media Advertising Popular Music Clothing

11. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Damage to Men from Porn and Masturbation Turns men in upon themselves thereby damaging their self-giving as spouses and fathers Prevents men from being the leaders, providers and protectors that God has called them to be Damages male confidence Harms the ability to see and to respect the true beauty of one’s wife/of women

12. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Damage to Men from Porn and Masturbation Loss of respect in women with increased tendency to control, dominate and overreact in anger Harms the ability to communicate Leads to reclusiveness and to an escape from reality Perpetuates lies and deceit Increases guilt,shame Harms faith that strengthens men Harms the relationship with the Lord

13. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. The Addictiveness of Porn There are Two Sides to Addiction The Physiological Side The body becomes dependent on the pornography and physically craves it. The Emotional Side Pornography is needed to ease emotional pain

14. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Physical Addiction Men are visually stimulated Viewing an erotic image releases Dopamine in the brain. When mixed with Testosterone, it can affect the brain like a drug Creates a feeling of excitement Excitement + Sexual Arousal + Orgasm = The desire for more! This is where an addiction can develop

15. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Physical Addiction Soon a tolerance develops More of the substance is needed to achieve the same effect – “soft porn” is not enough The man moves onto “hard-core porn,” which can include violence, children, fetishes, etc. Dependence develops after this. The man craves porn physically and emotionally.

16. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Physical Addiction Eventually viewing sexual acts in pornography is not enough The addict will want to engage in the sexual acts he has seen in pornography He may seek out prostitutes or anonymous sex partners This can result in contracting sexually transmitted diseases and even death

17. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Emotional Addiction Often, men will use pornography to ease the pain of deep emotional wounds This is done subconsciously However, they keep going back to it over and over again.

18. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Emotional Addiction Common Emotional Wounds Selfishness Family of Origin Wounds Loneliness Male insecurity Poor body image Marital conflicts Excessive pressures Weak spiritual life

19. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Emotional Addiction Sexual utilitarian philosophy Accessibility Mistrust of women/men Lack of a sense of fulfillment Lack of sexual confidence These conflicts lead to five core cognitive distortions.

20. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Core Beliefs that Fuel Pornography Addiction 1. I am unworthy of being loved. 2. If people really knew me, they would reject me. 3. I cannot trust anyone, including God, to meet my needs. 4. I must find something that I can control to meet my needs. 5. Pornography/sex is my greatest need and source of comfort.

21. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Sexual Dating, Escort, and Chat Room Websites When viewing pornography is no longer satisfying, some men will turn to these sites to find people for the purpose of having sex Often done with escorts/prostitutes Can lead to heavy amounts of dangerous, anonymous, and/or promiscuous sex No different than an extramarital affair Can go on for years

22. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Women and Pornography Women keeping their cyber activities secret: 70% Women struggling with pornography addiction: 17% Ratio of women to men favoring chat rooms: 2X

23. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Women and Pornography Percentage of visitors to adult websites who are women: 1 in 3 visitors Women accessing adult websites each month: 9.4 million Women admitting to accessing pornography at work: 13%

24. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Women and Pornography/ Sexual Addiction Women are not as visually stimulated as men More relationally stimulated Prefer a fantasy world where they can take part in a relationship. Romance novels, soap operas, movies, etc. Thus, more interested in chatrooms Women can become addicted to the erotic/romantic relationships just as men can become addicted to erotic images.

25. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. How Wives Feel About Their Husbands Viewing Porn It is as serious as an extramarital affair They feel deeply hurt and betrayed Makes them feel unattractive and sexually undesirable They cannot compete with the young women in pornography

26. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. How Wives Feel About Their Husbands Viewing Porn View their husbands as untrustworthy and as weak role models for children Some women experience symptoms of severe trauma Leads to severe marital problems and even divorce

27. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Damage to Marriage/Family A delusional belief that fantasy is better than authentic love Growth in selfishness, the major enemy of marital love, with severe harm to one’s spouse Failure to understand and appreciation the beauty and sacredness of marital love Lack of refinement in self-giving to the romantic, friendship, and spousal love Diminished communication with one's spouse

28. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Damage to Marriage/Family Sadness, anger, weakened confidence, diminished ability to trust in offended spouse Harms marital intimacy Increases loneliness and anger Creates a disordered view of beauty, goodness, the human person and sexuality Increases vulnerability to adultery Leads to marital separation & divorce Weakens the spiritual life

29. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Warning Signs in Marriage 1. Neglecting the romantic aspect of the marriage 2. Neglecting the marital friendship 3. Loss of interest in the intimate relationship 4. Going to bed several hours after the wife 5. Intuitive sense that he fails to appreciate his wife’s beauty and goodness

30. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Warning Signs in Marriage 6. Preferring masturbation over marital sex 7. Difficulty with sexual performance 8. Minimizes the seriousness of porn 9. Attempts to isolate from spouse with the computer 10. Preoccupation with oral/anal sex

31. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Porn in the Bedroom Used to try to “spice up” a couple’s sex life. Driven by conflicts described earlier and by sin Never helps a marriage Manipulates/coerces spouses into committing degrading sexual acts Separates sex from the unitive and procreative act Often leads to great disappointment

32. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Damage to Young Men Involvement in the fantasy world undermines their ability to communicate and relate to women in a healthy manner Interferes with the development of a healthy personality Harms their ability to understand and want to make a loving commitment in marriage Fosters the hook-up culture Results in “sexual obesity”

33. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Damage to Young Men Can lead to severe loneliness, depression, social anxiety and profound weaknesses in confidence Given the severe harm caused by pornography in marriages, premarital programs should address this issue. If the person is unwilling to address and resolve this conflict, a young woman should reconsider marriage. The Church should consider not allowing such a person to marry.

34. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Damage to Young Women/Girls According to the APA, the sexualisation of women leads to girls and young women feeling bad about themselves. There is evidence that sexualisation contributes to impaired academic performance, and can contribute to body dissatisfaction, eating disorders, low self- esteem, depression, and even physical health problems in high-school-aged girls and in young women.

35. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Damage to Young Women/Girls In addition to leading to feelings of shame and anxiety, sexualizing treatment and self- objectification can generate feelings of disgust toward one’s physical self. Girls may feel they are ugly and gross. APA Task Force on the Sexualization of Girls (2007)www.apa.org/pi/women/programs/girls/re port.aspx www.apa.org/pi/women/programs/girls/re port.aspx

36. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Damage to Young Women/Girls Some males pressure girls to send them nude photos of themselves on cell phones and/or engage in “sexting.” Males insist upon having pornography as an aspect of their relationship. Girls are being invited to see themselves not as healthy, active and imaginative girls, but as hot and sassy tweens on the prowl. Andrea Nauze and Emma Rush, Corporate Pedophilia: Sexualization of children in Australia (2006 )

37. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Damage to Young Women/Girls Females are reduced to sex toys and masturbatory aids. And men are portrayed as predatory and masterful, never as gentle and considerate lovers. The American Psychological Association makes the vital point that sexualisation practices may function to keep girls ‘in their place’ as objects of sexual attraction and beauty, significantly limiting their free thinking and movement in the culture.

38. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Children and Pornography Average age of a child’s first exposure to internet pornography: 11 80% of 15 – 17 year olds have had multiple exposures to hard-core porn 89% of all solicitations of youth in chat rooms are sexual 29% of 7 – 17 year olds would freely give out their addresses online

39. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Damage to Children Robs children of their innocence. Introduces them to a world they are not able to understand. Leaves children with a distorted view of sexuality Promotes the Sexual Utilitarian Philosophy Teaches boys that it is okay to use women Teaches girls that men are violent and cannot be trusted Children imitate behavior they view in adult pornography with other children.

40. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Damage to Children An extensive recent study of hardcore adult pornography, www.moralityinmedia.org, shows how it contributes to the sexual exploitation of childrenwww.moralityinmedia.org For many perpetrators there is a progression from viewing adult porn to viewing child porn. Perpetrators use pornography to groom their victims.

41. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Damage to Spiritual Life Bishop Robert Finn wrote, paraphrasing John Paul II, that "the problem with pornography is not that it reveals too much of the person (exposed in the image), but that it reveals too little of the person. The person in the image is reduced to their sexual organs and sexual faculties and is thereby de- personalized," Blessed Are The Pure In Heart: A Pastoral Letter on the Dignity of the Human Person and the Dangers of Pornography, February 21, 2007

42. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Damage to Spiritual Life "This plague stalks the souls of men, women and children, ravages the bonds of marriage and victimizes the most innocent among us. It obscures and destroys people’s ability to see one another as unique and beautiful expressions of God’s creation, instead darkening their vision, causing them to view others as objects to be used and manipulated. Those who engage in such activity deprive themselves of sanctifying grace and destroy the life of Christ in their souls.” Bishop Loverde’s Letter, 2006

43. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Enabling the Porn Plague Permissive parenting style with an abandonment of emotional and spiritual leadership Selfishness in parents Contraceptive mentality Failure to appreciate the beauty and sacredness of marital love Failure to communicate the fullness of the Church’s teaching on sexual morality

44. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Enabling the Porn Plague Lack of awareness of the harm caused by porn and masturbation Media Educators Cultural animus against Judeo-Christian morality Society’s refusal to address the issue

45. Copyright 2011 Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Peter C. Kleponis, Ph.D. Comprehensive Counseling Services 100 Four Falls Corporate Center Suite 312 West Conshohocken, PA 19428 610-397-0960 www.MaritalHealing.com