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1 Raising Resilient Children Conducted by [Practitioner Name]

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Presentation on theme: "1 Raising Resilient Children Conducted by [Practitioner Name]"— Presentation transcript:

1 1 Raising Resilient Children Conducted by [Practitioner Name]

2 2 Today’s Agenda Overview of Triple P Highlights from Seminars 1 & 2 Emotional resilience in children Building blocks for success Take home messages Question time

3 3 Overview of Triple P Triple P = Positive Parenting Program Developed in Australia 30 years of research Used in 22 countries Local program sponsored by First 5 Santa Cruz County

4 4 Triple P Services Seminars: General parenting information –The Power of Positive Parenting –Raising Confident, Competent Children –Raising Resilient Children Workshops: Brief help with specific and common parenting issues Groups: Brief (4 sessions) or In-depth (8 sessions) One on One Consultations : Brief (1-4 sessions) or In-depth (10 sessions) Additional Triple P Support

5 5 Seminar 1: 5 Principles 1.Creating a safe, interesting environment 2.Having a positive learning environment 3.Using assertive discipline 4.Having realistic expectations 5.Taking care of yourself

6 6 Seminar 2: Building blocks Raising confident, competent children

7 7 Emotional resilience Emotional resilience is the ability to: recognize and accept feelings express feelings in appropriate ways face and resolve difficult situations cope with stressful or upsetting situations These abilities are related to children’s development

8 8 Importance of resilience Children need to learn to cope with everyday feelings and difficult situations Some children experience very stressful life events Ability to cope with feelings is related to –social skills and relationships –tolerance and compassion –coping with life experiences –prevention of emotional problems

9 9 Emotionally resilient children are: caring and socially skilled empathic and sensitive able to manage their feelings able to cope with stress or unpleasant experiences less likely to resort to unhelpful ways of coping Benefits for children

10 10 Building blocks

11 11 Building block 1 Recognizing and accepting feelings

12 12 Developmental changes Children gradually: learn to recognize and understand their emotions and those of others become aware of different feelings learn the words to describe their feelings develop more complex feelings These changes are related to their language, thinking and experiences

13 13 What parents can do Accept that ups and downs are normal Talk about feelings Be emotionally expressive Share feelings appropriately Help your child recognize and name emotions Encourage your child to be emotionally expressive

14 14 Building block 2 Expressing feelings appropriately

15 15 Expressing emotions What emotional expression is OK –words –expressions –actions When to express feelings –to whom –how often –how much What emotional expression is not OK Family and cultural expectations

16 16 Traps for parents Talking too much about own feelings Dwelling on upsets Showing too much interest in feelings Being overly sympathetic or encouraging avoidance Over-reacting to minor upsetting events Not giving enough attention to other behavior

17 17 Talking about feelings Ask how your child feels Listen to what they say Summarize what they say Avoid telling your child how they should feel Read stories and talk about the characters’ feelings Help your child recognize feelings in others

18 18 Encouraging children Give your child positive attention for expressing feelings in appropriate ways –positive feelings –negative feelings Congratulate your child for managing difficult situations

19 19 Dealing with problems Use consistent discipline –tell your child to stop –acknowledge their feelings –give a brief explanation –tell your child what to do instead –use back up consequences if needed Model better ways of expressing feelings

20 20 Building block 3 Building a positive outlook

21 21 A positive outlook Having a positive outlook can involve: optimistic thinking curiosity and exploration contentment

22 22 Encouraging optimism Model being optimistic Encourage goals Encourage initiative and creativity Encourage activities where your child will experience success Show how your child has control over events Point out what your child does well Talk about the ‘good side’

23 23 Encouraging curiosity Encourage your child to decide what to do Let your child explore and show your interest Be available when your child wants to show you something Ask questions and make comments Help your child learn how to find more information

24 24 Encouraging contentment Model being appreciative and grateful Ask about the day’s highlights Have shared family experiences Discuss other people’s point of view Discuss accepting things that can’t be changed Foster involvement in meaningful activities Encourage your child to slow down and take in their world

25 25 Building block 4 Developing coping skills

26 26 Coping skills Problem solving Positive self-talk Talking back to unhelpful thoughts Relaxing mentally and physically Asking for help and support

27 27 Helping problem solving Set a good example Play games that promote thinking Encourage your child to find answers Prompt your child to work at solving problems Congratulate your child when they solve a problem on their own Involve your child in family problem solving

28 28 Problem solving steps Define the problem Come up with solutions Evaluate the options Decide on the best solution Put the plan into action Review how it worked and revise the plan if necessary

29 29 Building positive self-talk Ask your child to evaluate their own achievements Explain how thinking different ways affects how you feel Prompt your child to think about what others might think or feel Point out helpful and unhelpful thinking Model using positive self-talk to cope with stress

30 30 Helping children relax Provide a good model of how to manage stress Help children find ways to relax that work for them Relaxation strategies include: –taking slow, deep breaths –relaxing their muscles –listening to a relaxation tape or calming music

31 31 Looking for support Discuss how everyone needs to talk Talk about how you get support from others Help children find someone to talk to: –a close family member –a trusted friend –a school teacher –a counsellor

32 32 Building block 5 Dealing with negative feelings

33 33 Negative emotions All children have negative emotions Parents cannot completely protect children from these feelings Many emotions pass quickly Parents can calmly assist and prompt problem solving Parents can help children learn to resolve negative feelings on their own

34 34 Managing emotions Notice when your child is upset Ask what is wrong and listen Summarize what you have heard Acknowledge their feelings Ask what they want to do Ask how you can help Prompt problem solving If upset continues, suggest ‘cooling off’ Stay calm yourself Make a time to talk later

35 35 Preparing for emotions Help your child learn to cope on their own, for example, with anxiety Set a good example Talk about anxious feelings Teach your child coping strategies Encourage facing fears gradually Stay calm Prompt coping strategies Praise your child’s efforts Talk about dangerous situations

36 36 Building block 6 Dealing with stressful events

37 37 Stressful life events Change Problems with peers Major disappointment Unpleasant experiences Loss Marital separation or divorce Joining a new family Trauma or serious illness Natural disasters Terrifying experiences

38 38 Coping with life events Allow your child to be upset Ask what happened Say something positive Reassure your child where appropriate Don’t feel you have to solve the problem Suggest something to cheer your child up Check later Encourage use of coping skills Seek advice if the problem continues

39 39 Explain why the move is necessary Familiarize your child with the new situation Talk about the advantages Get your child involved Maintain routines as much as possible Help your child keep in touch with friends Example: moving house

40 40 Example: dealing with loss Consider your child’s developmental level Reassure your child where appropriate Encourage appropriate expression of feelings Provide information Maintain routines as much as possible Arrange a child carer if the loss affects you Talk about feelings, coping, memories

41 41 Take home messages

42 42 Take home messages The foundations for emotional resilience are laid in early childhood Emotional skills are important for happiness, wellbeing and success in life Children learn a lot about managing their emotions from parents

43 43 Take home messages Parents can help children learn to: recognize and accept feelings express feelings in appropriate ways develop a positive outlook and coping skills deal with negative feelings and stressful life events

44 44 Tip Sheet Review it with your partner or by yourself. Review it this week! Choose one strategy you learned today to try at home.

45 45 Next Steps Attend the next seminar [insert date] Contact [insert name] for more services [insert info] Contact First 5 Santa Cruz County for more services (831) 465-2217 or or visit

46 46 Stay Connected “Like” us on Facebook!

47 47 Question time

48 48 Positive Parenting… Small changes, Big differences

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