1. Writing the Essay: Mentoring & Modelling First Paragraph Structure Johanna de Leeuw, PhD Stacie Goegan, M Teaching, BA (Honors)

2. The 30 31 Minute Method How to Write an Introduction Paragraph for a Personal Essay Or How to Successfully Complete Your English Homework in 30 31 Minutes so You Can Play Minecraft

3. Step 1 (no minutes) Doesn’t take any time at all But does require will power!! RESIST TEMPTATION Ignore all texts, emails, and Facebook messages asking you about what the homework assignment is – you have priorities – and Minecraft is calling…

4. First Paragraph Structure Hook (The first sentence in your essay) - can be a quote - an overarching statement - a question - Three. Fragment. Sentences. Lead (The sentence after your hook that connects the hook to your thesis) Arguments / Evidence (these can come before, after, or in your thesis) Thesis – Arguments are sometimes included – An “is”/“are” or a “leads to” statement – A “that” statement Transition

5. The most important first step Unpack the Question The assumption is that you know your text inside out and have developed your own ideas in relation to the text For a personal response essay, you are asked to make a debatable claim that demonstrates your insight on a specific topic (essential question) Your claim should strike the reader as an “aha” rather than a “duh” observation

6. The Question Write an essay to show the importance of understanding identity. You may wish to write about yourself or other people, real or fictional. You may set your writing in the past, present, or future.

7. Step Two (5 minutes) Brainstorm! (The importance of identity) – Circumstances that create our identity – Times when your own identity is connected to external factors – Reasons why understanding your own identity is important – Times when identity is difficult because of the influence of others – Events or circumstances in “On the Sidewalk Bleeding” that demonstrated Andy’s sense of or desire for identity

8. Step Three (5 minutes) Once you’ve collected a few ideas, complete the following thoughts: – Individual identity is created… – An understanding of individual identity leads to… – A sense of identity is necessary… – …leads to the creation of our own identity. – Andy’s desire for identity in “On the Sidewalk Bleeding” is shown when…

9. Make a Debatable Claim an “is”/“are” statement A “leads to” statement creates a debatable claim (which is essentially a argument/thesis).

10. Sample Framework When... in “On the Sidewalk Bleeding” by Evan Hunter, and in my own life when… are all examples that show...

11. Examples An individual’s identity is sometimes created by the assumptions of others. An understanding of individual identity leads to better personal decision making. Understanding individual identity leads to greater acceptance and understanding of others. A sense of identity is necessary for personal fulfilment and pursuing personal goals. Having the support of a loving family and belonging to a community leads to the creation of our own identity.

12. Step Four (5 minutes) 1.Choose your favorite claim statement from step 4 2.Pick three of your brainstorming ideas (one about the short story and one or two from your personal experience) to work with 3.Put them together with your claim (thesis) HINTS when responding to texts: - Use the author’s name - Mention the genre - Short Stories and Poems are in “quotes” - Novels, Movies, and Plays are in Italics

13. EXAMPLE Andy’s determination to take his jacket off before he dies in Evan Hunter’s short story, “On the Sidewalk Bleeding”, a time in school when the teacher thought my sister had written my homework for me because of my printing, and a time at summer camp when we were ranked according to cabins instead of skill level, are all examples that show an individual’s identity is sometimes created by the assumptions of others.

14. Changing the order & shorter sentences An individual’s identity is sometimes created by the assumptions of others. This can be seen in Evan Hunter’s short story, “On the Sidewalk Bleeding” when Andy is determined to take his jacket off before he dies. Examples in my life are a time in school when the teacher thought my sister had written my homework for me because of my printing, and a time at summer camp when we were ranked according to cabins instead of skill level.

15. Step Five: Write your first paragraph (5 minutes): Create a Hook (The first sentence in your essay). – can be a quote – an overarching statement – a question or series of questions – Three. Fragment. Sentences. Regardless of which form you choose, a Hook must be relevant to your topic and connect to your thesis EXAMPLES: Mark Zuckerberg once said, “think about what people are doing on Facebook today. They are keeping up with their friends and family, but they are also building an image and identity for themselves, which, in a sense, is their brand.” Identity is one of the hardest things to lose. Do we understand the events that make us who we are? Who are you? Where do you come from? Where are you going? Growth. Perspective. Identity.

16. Step Six (5 minutes) Create a Lead (The sentence after your hook that connects the hook to your thesis) EXAMPLE: Whether you are a teenager on the verge of self- discovery, or thinking about the importance of life experiences, an individual’s identity is sometimes developed by factors beyond our control.

17. Step Seven (5 minutes): Put it all together in this order: – Hook – Lead – Supporting Arguments – Thesis You can vary the order of the last two: (The thesis and arguments can either be before or after each other)

18. SAMPLE FIRST PARAGRAPH Mark Zuckerberg once said, “think about what people are doing on Facebook today. They are keeping up with their friends and family, but they are also building an image and identity for themselves, which, in a sense, is their brand.” What happens though, when our brand is compromised? When who we are is challenged? Whether you are a teenager on the verge of self-discovery, or thinking about the importance of life experiences, an individual’s identity is sometimes developed by factors beyond our control. An individual’s identity is sometimes created by the assumptions of others. This can be seen in Evan Hunter’s short story, “On the Sidewalk Bleeding” when Andy is determined to take his jacket off before he dies. Examples in my life are a time in school when the teacher thought my sister had written my homework for me because of my printing, and a time at summer camp when we were ranked according to cabins instead of skill level.

19. Step Nine Play Minecraft! https://www.edsurge.com/news/2015-05-26-how-minecraft-and- duct-tape-wallets-prepare-our-kids-for-jobs-that-don-t-exist-yet