2. The Nurtured Heart Approach The approach is about how to therapeutically shift intense children to using their intensity in wonderful ways. And it’s about having powerful ways of making any moment an opportunity to create success for all children. It’s about filling a child’s portfolio with experiences of success and self-worth.

3. The Nurtured Heart Approach Children need to be stronger on the inside than ever before. Would you agree? We want to help our children find their inner strength!

4. The Nurtured Heart Approach It’s about being in the moment, creating first hand experiences of success.

5. Creating Success in the Moment It’s more than “catching a child being good”. It’ about actively “creating greatness”.

6. The Nurtured Heart Approach Video Game Logic Most children love video games. Why???

7. Video Game Logic Provide the perfect level of structure & consequences….life makes sense. Timing is always right (in the moment) & payoffs are not upside down. Create an energy of wanting to be “in the game”. This is what we want to provide… structure, consequences, in the moment, an energy that makes them want to “be in the game”.

8. The Nurtured Heart Approach Stands (The Three Legged Table) 1. Absolutely NO! I refuse to energize negativity. 2. Absolutely YES! I will relentlessly energize the positive. 3. Absolutely CLEAR! I will clearly but un-energetically enforce limits.

9. The Nurtured Heart Approach Refusing to Energize Negativity (Absolutely NO! I refuse to energize negativity.)

10. Refusing to Energize Negativity Traditionally at school and at home children get our energy when they are breaking rules.

11. Attention to “the negative” is like junk food. It has no nutritional value. Traditional behavior management techniques are “Upside Down”. Refusing to Energize Negativity “Chats” Lectures Pep Talks Raised Voices

12. Refusing to Energize Negativity When does your child feel most celebrated (get the most of your energy)? (Reflection)

13. Energize the Positive (Absolutely YES! I will relentlessly energize the positive.) AND Refuse to Energize the Negative ( Absolutely NO! I refuse to energize negativity).

14. Active Recognition Describe behaviors or emotions as if describing for a blind companion “I see you.” Conveys esteem, you are not invisible.

15. Active Recognition Your brother annoyed you and you walked away. I noticed that you started on your homework right away. I see that you get frustrated when you strike out but you are sticking with it. I see you are wearing your favorite shirt today!

16. Experiental Recognition I see your behavior and what is means is… Active Recognition + Character Trait

17. Experiental Recognition I appreciate that you’ve been doing extra reading. That shows responsibility. You did what I asked right away. That’s very respectful. You’ve been sharing with your sister. That’s very thoughtful.

18. Experiental Recognition Think about your children. What traits do you want to see them develop? (Reflection) This is where you put your energy!!!

19. Proactive Recognition Energize and show appreciation when rules are NOT being broken. Give recognition to self-control and healthy power. Recognize that there is ALWAYS an underlying effort when rules are NOT being broken.

20. Proactive Recognition Proactive Recognition You haven’t been teasing or arguing with your brother. You are being very mature! You didn’t throw a tantrum when you were told “no”. Great self-control. I appreciate that you are not being demanding. You are being very thoughtful.

21. The Nurtured Heart Approach Multiplying Successes Energize what IS and what ISN’T happening. Stay in the moment. The more INTENSE the child…the more INTENSE the intervention. Keep it honest and speak from the heart. Fearlessly Nurture Greatness!

22. How You Can Support Nitsch?

23. How You Can Support Nitsch Celebrate greatness from school –notes, phone calls, Tuesday folders, Shields. Find greatness at home & everywhere you go!

24. The Nurtured Heart Approach Always begin with relationship + recognition.

25. The Nurtured Heart Approach Consequences & Limits (Absolutely CLEAR! I will clearly but un-energetically enforce limits.)

26. Consequences & Limits The Rules Clear and precise No wiggle room Negative?

27. Consequences & Limits The Rules at Nitsch Our Core Values Educational Excellence Prized Relationships Collaborative Community Attitude of Gratitude Intentional Loyalty

28. Consequences & Limits The Rules It’s always important to know what your rules are. What are your family rules? (Reflect)

29. Consequences & Limits The Consequences Given with little or no energy or emotion. No warnings or lectures Brief Immediate No grudges

30. Consequences & Limits The Consequences The Consequence is a RESET. A removal of energy An intention to provide an opportunity to get back on track Not intended to be a punishment

31. Consequences & Limits The Consequences The Consequence is a RESET. Takes place in the where the child is Is followed by a “welcome back” and/or a recognition of “greatness”

32. Consequences & Limits The Consequences RESETS are really about effective “Time Ins”

33. Consequences & Limits The Consequences RESETS at Nitsch

34. Consequences & Limits The Consequences How Your Can Support Nitsch Don’t focus on “how many resets” at home. Send the message that everyone needs a reset every now and then. Practice resets at home. (Reflect)

35. Nurtured Heart at Nitsch! Remember the Three-Legged Table

36. The Nurtured Heart Approach Stands (The Three Legged Table) 1. Absolutely NO! I refuse to energize negativity. 2. Absolutely YES! I will relentlessly energize the positive. 3. Absolutely CLEAR! I will clearly but un-energetically enforce limits.

37. Remember…It’s all about YOU! YOU are the PRIZE!