1. GUIDELINES FOR EXPRESSING EMOTIONS THE NEXT SLIDES WILL DISCUSS 7 GUIDELINES FOR EXPRESSING EMOTIONS

2. RECOGNIZE YOUR FEELINGS By contrast people with a low affective orientation usually aren’t aware of their emotional states and tend to regard feelings as useless and unimportant information. The ability to distinguish and label emotions is a vital component of emotional intelligence, both within and across cultures.

3. RECOGNIZE THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN FEELING, TALKING, AND ACTING. Understanding the difference between having feelings and acting them out can help you express yourself constructively in tough situations. Lashing out at someone is unlikely to diminish your feelings.

4. EXPAND YOUR EMOTIONAL VOCABULARY Some of the most commonly used emotions are good or bad, terrible or great. There are several ways to express a feeling verbally: by using single words such as excited, depressed, and curious. Describing what’s happening to you. Example: my stomach is tied in knots. What you’d like to do Example: I want to run away.

5. SHARE MULTIPLE FEELINGS Ask yourself how do I feel? What feelings might I express? You and your companion have a fight just before leaving for a party. Deep inside, you know that you were mostly to blame, even though you aren’t willing to admit it. When you arrive at the party, your companion leaves you to flirt with several other attractive guests. You could either show your anger or you could confront them calmly and express your feelings properly…

6. CONSIDER WHEN AND WHERE TO EXPRESS YOUR FEELINGS Number 1 rule, Count to 10. After you have waited for the first wave of strong anger to subside, it’s still important to choose the time that’s best suited for the message. It’s best to express your feelings one on one.

7. ACCEPT RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR FEELINGS Use “I” when expressing your feelings. For example: if you say “You hurt my feelings” the other person might think that you are angry at them. Instead say, “I feel hurt when you do that.”

8. BE MINDFUL OF THE COMMUNICATION CHANNEL Be careful when you use capital letters in CMC. A good time to use capital letters is when you are excited. “Flaming” is an extreme example of how CMC lend themselves to expressing negative emotions.