1. EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION

2. BODY LANGUAGE  Communication involves more than just words. How we dress, how we move our hands, what posture we take, all give a message to anyone listening.  These non-verbal actions consist of things such as facial expressions, posture, tone and pitch of voice, rate of speech, clothing and the use of physical space. Example: a wink, a hug, a scowl, crossing arms…

3. BODY LANGUAGE CONTINUED…  People have a tendency to believe these more readily than they do our verbal messages perhaps because they are less conscious and less subject to control.  Body language can also be easily misinterpreted. Is looking away a sign of disinterest or shyness? Touching can also be misinterpreted since it is relative to cultures, circumstances, etc. Source: Adapted from Creating a Christian Lifestyle, pages 163-185

4. GUIDELINES FOR LISTENING  Hold your tongue (keep quiet) and be attentive.  Convey an open spirit with your body language.  Stay in eye contact.  Avoid assuming anything about what the other person will say.  Give signals that you are listening.  Help by summarizing occasionally.  Ask clarifying questions.  Check your perception of the speaker’s body language.  Let the person know if you cannot listen at the time.

5. MURDER MYSTERY EXERCISE THE TASK OF THE GROUP IS TO SOLVE A MURDER MYSTERY BY FINDING THE MURDERER, THE WEAPON, THE TIME OF THE MURDER, THE PLACE OF THE MURDER, AND THE MOTIVE. EACH MEMBER HAS SOME CLUES THAT WILL HELP SOLVE THE MYSTERY. THESE CLUES MUST BE COMMUNICATED VERBALLY, BUT THE CARDS MAY NOT BE SHOWN TO OTHER GROUP MEMBERS. IN ADDITION YOU MAY NOT WRITE DOWN THE CLUES ON A SEPARATE SHEET OF PAPER. REMEMBER TO PLAY BY THE RULES!

6. HANDLING CONFLICTS  Conflict is inevitable in all relationships.  They can help us to clarify our thinking, sharpen our principles, and test our skills of communication.  How they are resolved is the key to whether we handle conflicts well or poorly.

7. HANDLING CONFLICTS CONTINUED…  The following principles help one deal constructively with anger and resolving conflicts:  DO UNTO OTHERS  Do you like it when people are condescending? Why they try to compromise?  They probably feel the same way as you do.

8. HANDLING CONFLICTS CONTINUED…  GO TO THE SOURCE  Speak to the person with whom you are in conflict. Involving a third party leads to more confusion and makes the problem worse.  GET THE FACTS STRAIGHT  Don’t act on rumor. Take the time to find out the truth.  TAKE A PROBLEM-SOLVING APPROACH  State the problem clearly. Brainstorm for possible solution. Evaluate each solution and choose one.