1. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Elaboration: Strategic Teaching To Improve Student Writing in Grades 3 - 5 OSPI Elementary Instructional Support Materials for Writing These materials were developed by Washington teachers to help students improve their writing. On the OSPI Website Version 1 – February 2007

2. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. To the Teacher Slides 1-11 are for teacher use. They include alignment with the GLEs, links to the WASL, and purpose of the units. Thereafter, the slides are meant for the students. The teacher directions are in the notes. You must download this PowerPoint to print notes. To use any unit, you must print and review the notes pages for the unit. This is done in the print menu. It is different for PCs and Macs, but you will need to find Notes Pages or Notes respectively in the print menu.The notes pages contain crucial instructions and supplementary materials for successful implementation. Most of these units include partner and/or group work. A system needs to be in place for partner and group work (e.g., what are the rules and expectations). Units in these modules need to have extended practice. They are not meant to be individual, one day lessons.

3. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. OSPI Writing Instructional Support Materials Elementary Core Development Team Nikki Elliott-Schuman - OSPI, Project Director Charlotte Carr - Retired Seattle SD, Facilitator Tanya Cicero - Auburn SD Lydia-Laquatra Fesler - Spokane SD Sharon Schilperoort - OSPI, Writing Assessment TOSA Cec Carmack - Selah SD Nancy Spane - Puyallup SD Karen Kearns - Seattle SD

4. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Purpose To share teaching strategies that will help students develop writing that elaborates a single idea and addresses the needs and interests of a particular audience. Elaboration is critical for clear and effective writing.

5. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Alignment with GLEs - Writing EALR 3. The student writes clearly and effectively. Component 3.1.1 Develops ideas and organizes writing. GLE 3.1.1 - 3rd GradeGLE 3.1.1 - 4th GradeGLE 3.1.1 - 5th Grade Analyzes ideas, selects topic, adds detail, and elaborates. Selects from a wide range of topics (e.g., friendship, volcanoes). Maintains focus on specific topic. Provides details and/or support (e.g., examples, descriptions, reasons). Uses personal experience and observation to support ideas. Develops characters, setting, and events in narratives. Selects appropriate title for a piece of writing. Analyzes ideas, selects a narrow topic, and elaborates using specific details and/or examples. Narrows topic (e.g., from general topic, such as pets, to specific topic, such as My dog is smart.). Selects details relevant to the topic to elaborate (e.g., adds detail to each main point using more than one sentence; uses specific words and phrases, reasons, anecdotes, facts, descriptions, and examples). Uses personal experiences, observations, and/or research to support opinions and ideas (e.g., collects, organizes, and uses data to support conclusions in math, science, or social studies). Develops character, setting, and events within plot when writing a narrative. Analyzes ideas, selects a narrow topic, and elaborates using specific details and/or examples Narrows topic with controlling idea (e.g., from general topic, such as baseball, to specific topic, such as The Mariners are my favorite baseball team.). Selects details relevant to the topic to extend ideas and develop elaboration (e.g., specific words and phrases, reasons, anecdotes, facts, descriptions, examples). Uses personal experiences, observations, and research to support opinions and ideas (e.g., data relevant to the topic to support conclusions in math, science, or social studies; appropriate anecdotes to explain or persuade). Varies method of developing character (e.g., dialogue) and setting (e.g., through the eyes of a character) in narratives.

6. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Alignment with GLEs – Writing continued EALR 3. The student writes clearly and effectively. Component 3.2 Uses appropriate style. GLE 3.2.2 - 3rd gradeGLE 3.2.2 - 4th gradeGLE 3.2.2 - 5th grade Uses language appropriate for a specific audience and purpose. Selects specific words (e.g., hollered vs. said) and specialized vocabulary (e.g., transparent vs. clear). Selects interesting and effective words from various sources (e.g., multicultural literature, television, environmental print, cultural background). Uses literary devices (e.g., onomatopoeia, alliteration). Uses language appropriate for a specific audience and purpose. Uses precise words (e.g., vivid verbs screeched, hovered, absorbed; specific nouns granite, longhouse, cedar). Uses specialized vocabulary in informational writing (e.g., tessellate, parallelogram, butte, carbohydrate). Uses literary and sound devices (e.g., similes, personification, alliteration). Uses language appropriate for a specific audience and purpose. Uses precise language (e.g., powerful verbs, specific descriptors). Uses formal, informal, and specialized language (e.g., photosynthesis, ratio, expedition) appropriate for audience and purpose. Uses literary and sound devices (e.g., similes, personification, rhythm). Selects words for effect.

7. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Alignment with GLEs Across the Curriculum Reading 2.2.1 Understands sequence in informational/expository text and literary/narrative text. (3rd/4th) 2.2.1 Applies understanding to time, order, and/or sequence to comprehend text. (5th) 2.2.3 Understands story elements. (3rd) 2.2.3 Understands and analyze story elements. (4th/5th) 2.4.5 Understands how to generalize from a text. (3rd/4th) 2.4.5 Understands how to extend information beyond the text to another text or to a broader idea or concept by generalizing. (5th)

8. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Alignment with GLEs Across the Curriculum Math 2.1.1 Analyzes a situation to define a problem. 3.1.1 Analyzes information presented in familiar situations. 3.2.2 Applies the skills of drawing conclusions and supports the conclusions with evidence. Science 2.1.3 Understands how to conduct a reasonable explanation using evidence. 2.1.5 Understands how to report investigations and explanations of objects, events, systems, and processes. 3.1.3 Analyzes how well a design or a product solves a problem.

9. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Elaboration during Science

10. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Link to the WASL The quality of elaboration is directly related to scores on the Content, Organization, and Style portion of the Writing WASL. The best writing has multiple layers of relevant elaboration. When WASL papers were analyzed, specific layered elaboration was the most critical element that differentiated between scores of 2 and 3 and scores of 3 and 4. Thoughtful elaboration is guided by the needs of the audience. Top scoring WASL papers show clear audience awareness. Source: WASL scoring team, OSPI Standards Review Committee report

11. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Bibliography Calkins, L. Units of Study for Teaching Writing, Grades 3-5, Heinemann, 2006. Gere, A., Christenbury, L., Sassi, K. Writing on Demand, Heinemann, 2005. Graves, D. A Fresh Look at Writing, Heinemann, 1998. Routman, R. Writing Essentials, Heinemann, 2005. Zemelman, S., Daniels, H., Hyde, A. Best Practice: New Standards for Teaching and Learning in Americas Schools, Third edition, Heinemann, 2005. OSPI website – Grade 4 Writing Anchor Set Annotations www.k12.wa.us/curriculuminstruct/writing/annotations/4gradAnnotations.aspx www.k12.wa.us/curriculuminstruct/writing/annotations/4gradAnnotations.aspx

12. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Elaboration Units Table of Contents Defining Elaboration - slides 13-17 Using Questions to Elaborate - slides 18-29 Layering vs. Listing - slides 30-40

13. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. DEFINING ELABORATION

14. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Definition of Elaboration Elaboration means to tell the reader more about an idea using Answers to a readers questions Specific words Onion-like layering of detail Specific strategies, such as reasons, examples, definitions, descriptions, and anecdotes

15. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. To Elaborate, You Need To Dig, Dig!

16. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Elaboration - example one This paragraph has little elaboration. These are the things you need to know about being in fourth grade. First the work will be a lot harder. You will have to name solids and do lots of math work. Next you will have to do writing assignments.

17. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Elaboration - example two This paragraph has interesting elaboration. I want to tell you about what type of projects youll have to do. Two things are dissecting a salmon and an owl pellet. An owl pellet is mostly like a fur ball. Its something an owl chokes up after eating a large meal. You get my drift?

18. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Using Questions to Elaborate

19. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Questions the Audience (Reader) Might Ask All kids have problems. What problems?

20. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Questions the Audience (Reader) Might Ask All kids have problems. For example, kids dont always get what they want. Hmmm...what do kids want?

21. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Questions the Audience (Reader) Might Ask All kids have problems. For example, kids dont always get what they want, like staying up late. Oh…now I understand. Kids want to stay up late. Why is not being able to stay up late a problem?

22. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Using Questions for Elaboration Think of ways to answer the question, Why is not being able to stay up as late as you want a problem for you? Discuss with a partner possible answers.

23. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Readers Questions Did this writer answer the readers questions? I have nice friends. They make me laugh and they teach me things at recess. My friends are Jay, Emily, Ann, and Andy. They taught me how to do tricks on the bars.

24. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Questions Asked by the Writer I have nice friends. What makes them nice? They make me laugh and they teach me things at recess. Who are your friends and what do they teach you? My friends are Jay, Emily, Ann, and Andy. They taught me how to do tricks on the bars.

25. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Readers Questions Did this writer answer the readers questions? When I learned how to roller skate, I was only five years old. My mom taught me how to roller skate, but she kept on falling down. Soon I was the best roller skater in my family. And when I went on a field trip in second grade to Roller Valley, almost everyone was falling down.

26. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Questions Not Answered by the Writer When I learned how to roller skate, I was only five years old. My mom taught me how to roller skate, but she kept on falling down. Then how did you learn? Soon I was the best roller skater in my family. So how did this happen? And when I went on a field trip in second grade to Roller Valley, almost everyone was falling down. What does this have to do with learning? How does it tie to your learning to skate?

27. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Readers Questions I like it when it rains. Lets finish writing this paragraph together by thinking about what the reader would ask and answering the readers questions.

28. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Readers Questions I like when it snows. You are now going to get a chance to finish writing this paragraph with a partner. Think about what the reader would ask and then answer the readers questions.

29. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Using Questions for Elaboration - your turn _____ makes a good pet. Using this statement, think about what questions the audience might ask. Write several sentences that elaborate and answer the questions you think the audience might ask.

30. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. LAYERING vs. LISTING

31. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Layering Elaboration A thoughtful writer layers one sentence after another. Each new sentence adds to or develops the thought like rings around a bulls-eye.

32. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Layering Elaboration Each idea is carefully stacked on the next like bricks in a wall or rings on a tall tree.

33. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Layering Elaboration Every sentence and detail fits with the rest of the topic like a set of nesting dolls.

34. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Layering vs. Listing You and a partner will receive an envelope. Take the yellow sentence strips out of the envelope and put them in the order you think they should be arranged.

35. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Layering vs. Listing Now take the red sentence strips out of the envelope and put them in the order you think they should be arranged.

36. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Listing My bracelet is special to me. The bracelet means a lot to me because it gives me good memories of my friend. And because it is very special to me. Its special in another way. It gives me good luck. Thats why my bracelet is special to me.

37. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Layering My bracelet is the object that means the most to me. It means a lot because my bracelet brings me good luck. It brought me luck on the first day I went to my new school. When I entered my classroom I saw a girl with a bracelet just like mine. Her name was Talli. Now we are best friends and we wear our bracelets wherever we go. When I wear it, I think of all of fun times Talli and I have had and it reminds me that I have a great friend.

38. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Layering Read the following topic sentence. Together we will add sentences that develop the topic by layering. Remember that each sentence must build on the previous one. The field trip was fantastic.

39. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Layering Read the following topic sentence. With a partner take turns adding sentences that develop the topic by layering. Dessert is my favorite part of the meal.

40. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Layering - your turn Read the following topic sentence. Write a paragraph and practice adding sentences that develop the main idea by layering. The subject (in the blank) can be anything (rain, homework, my pet, commercials, etc.), but it cant be a person. ________is very annoying.

41. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Coming Soon ~ 2007 Summer Institutes Elaboration Module Using Precise Language to Elaborate Using Reasons to Elaborate Using Examples to Elaborate Using Definitions to Elaborate Using Description to Elaborate Using Anecdotes to Elaborate Show, Don't Tell Recognizing Elaboration Criteria for Assessment Prewriting Module

42. Copyright 2007 Washington OSPI All rights reserved. Feedback, please We welcome your comments. Please feel free to try these lessons and send feedback to Nikki Elliott-Schuman at Nikki.elliottschuman@k12.wa.usNikki.elliottschuman@k12.wa.us. We appreciate your labeling the subject line as Feedback: OSPI Instructional Support Materials.