1. This is the thesis ES #5: Essay Thesis
I can craft a clear, focused and sophisticated thesis that outlines a cohesive and compelling argument in response to a prompt at a level that exhibits college readiness.

2. What are the elements of a good thesis?
Answers the question asked or prompted
Clearly states how it will answer the question
Is one concise thought, and comes in the correct place
Is debatable

3. Essay about Duncan suffering from “Weak Ruleritis”
We want to say he suffers from “Weak Ruleritis” and these are our three reasons why:
People do not respect him
He has poor judgment
He is killed off very easily

4. Example #1
Duncan suffers from Weak Ruleritis because he is not respected, he trusts the wrong people and he is killed so easily.

5. Example #1: Lower Level
Duncan suffers from a “Weak Ruleritis” because he is not respected, he trust the wrong people and he is killed so easily.
This is not a bad thesis; however, it is not a strong thesis either:
Simple structure: “This” because of “That”
Three point thesis / a listing thesis
Diction is low level

6. To Make a Thesis Stronger
Use Qualifiers like “although…”, “when…”, “since…” and “if…, then…”
Qualifiers help eliminate reliance on the word because and result in a more mature sounding argument.
Also, try to move away from a listing / three point thesis

7. Example #2
Since Duncan is depicted as trusting people that betray him, as not respected by his subjects, and as defenseless, it is clear that he suffered from Weak Ruleritis.

8. Example #2: Middle Level
Since Duncan is depicted as trusting people that betray him, as not respected by his subject, and as defenseless, it is clear that he suffered from Weak Ruleritis.
This is considered to be a good thesis:
Not reliant on “This” because of “That”; rather, “This” IS “That”
Uses qualifier “since…”
Is still a three point thesis / a listing thesis

9. Example #3
Although he is an affable man, the easily felled Duncan consistently exhibits poor judgment and is not respected by his subjects which results in his development of Weak Ruleritis.

10. Example #3: Higher Level
Although he is an affable man, the easily felled Duncan consistently exhibits poor judgment and is not respected by his subjects which results in his development of Weak Ruleritis.
This is considered to be a strong thesis:
Use of “This” IS “That”
Is not a three point thesis / a listing thesis
Uses high level diction.

11. 3 More Things… DO NOT use the words “I”, “Me”, “We” in a formal essay!
It sounds stronger to just say “Duncan was a weak ruler” than to say “I think Duncan is a weak ruler”
DO NOT do a laundry list of examples!
Go back and forth between lines of examples and analysis; each specific example should be followed up a clear line of analysis or explanation
Keep asking yourself “Why is this important?” after every example when doing analysis

12. 3 More Things… (cont.)
Make sure your sentences with specific examples are clearly separated from your sentences with analysis
Use one sentence to state your specific example, use another to analyze that example.

13. Examples:
Do: In Act I: scene iv, Duncan says that the Thane of Cawdor was someone on whom he built “an absolute trust”. This instance is the first in a string of bad judgment calls by Duncan. He proves time and time again to trust traitors.

14. Examples:
DO NOT: In Act I: scene iv, Duncan makes the first in a string of bad judgment calls when he says that the Thane of Cawdor was someone on whom he built “an absolute trust” and this proves that he trusts traitors time and time again.

15. ESSAY REMINDERS:
You MUST have AT LEAST 2 EXAMPLES for each body paragraph!
You MUST have a Works Cited Page!
You MUST have a Title!
You MUST use proper MLA style citations!
Duncan says that the Thane of Cawdor was someone on whom he built “an absolute trust” (“Macbeth”, Act I, scene iv). This instance is the first in a string of bad judgment calls by Duncan. He proves time and time again to trust traitors.
You MUST submit a hard copy AND online!