1. #likeaBOSS
I can identify and describe the characteristics of “formal writing style”.
I can use formal word choices to create a more professional piece of writing.

2. Agenda You should have out: Guided notes sheet Pen or pencil
At least 1 essay or piece of writing that needs revision (to practice on)
Slang and conversational word choices
Confident, active word choices
Active voice
Get to the point: Short sentences for dramatic effect
“Upgrading” your synonyms
Formal transitions
Taking out personal pronouns
Are you asking me, or are you telling me?
Don’t talk about it – just DO it.
Avoiding absolutes
Agenda

3. How can you tell that writing is “formal” or “informal”?
Discussion Question

4. How can you tell that writing is “formal” or “informal”?
Content/topic
Intended audience
Writing style << Today, we are focusing on this part.
Discussion Question

5. Why formal writing? WHEN will you need to write formally?
For which AUDIENCES does formality matter?
Does EVERYONE need to be able to write this way?
What types of formal documents could you have to make? (Give me genres or document types)
Do you think you already write this way? Explain.
Why formal writing?

6. Why formal writing? WHEN will you need to write formally?
Essays for school, college admissions essays, job applications, etc.
For which AUDIENCES does formality matter?
Teachers, bosses, administrators, voters, managers, etc.
Does EVERYONE need to be able to write this way?
Yes. Even if you think your job won’t need it, you never know when you’ll need to defend yourself to an authority figure.
What types of formal documents could you have to make? (Give me genres or document types)
Essays, reports, memos, s, articles, business letters, informal letters, flyers/brochures, etc.
Do you think you already write this way? Explain.
(Answers vary by opinion)
Why formal writing?

7. Slang & Conversational Tone
Don’t use words that reveal your age!
Words to avoid:
texting abbreviations, emoticons, etc.
“Yeah”, “like”
Vague words: “things”, “stuff”, “it”
Conversational words or transitions
Actual questions (to self)
Bad example: So, why does gymnastics even matter? I mean, isn’t it really limited to a specific body type anyway?
Revised example: Gymnastics’ relevance is questionable to some people, since only a select few have the physical ability to meet its demands.
Slang & Conversational Tone
#growup >>>

8. Synonym Upgrades Replace vague words with specifics
Avoid words used too often, even nouns or keywords
“Upgrade” to a better synonym that makes you sound older
Don’t go too far: always using super-long, collegiate-sounding, multisyllabic words can backfire and sound pretentious.
Bad example: It is really important that we do something about this. Our schools have a problem, and if something doesn’t change, there will be problems.
Revised example: It is critical that schools find a solution to this crisis. The American educational system is flawed, and if both administrators and taxpayers refuse to address the situation, then our country could see low test scores for several generations.
Synonym Upgrades
My face when you use the same word 5 times… in one paragraph… #thesaurus #rilly?

9. Taking Out Personal Pronouns
STOP using “I” and “you”!
Write in third person
Exception: sometimes “we” is okay
Don’t overuse “people”
“One” is not the only option!
Specific alternatives:
“The reader” or “readers”
“Audiences”, “listeners” or “viewers”
“It is common knowledge that…”
“High school juniors…”
Bad example: I think that people should seriously, like, spend more time fixing their grammar before they hit send.
Revised example:
Students benefit from spending more time editing before submitting their work.
Taking Out Personal Pronouns
My face when you start a sentence with “I think”… #overdone #justsayit

10. Confident, Active Word Choices
Cut out “I think”, “I believe”, and “In my opinion”/ “My opinion is”
Use strong verbs
Ideal: action verbs
Less effective: “being” verbs
Is, am, are, was, were, be, being, been
Which sounds better?
I think he took it?
He stole it.
I believe that grammar is important.
Grammar matters.
In my opinion, the Kardashians have no real talent and shouldn’t be famous.
The Kardashians lack any real talent; their fame was not earned.
Confident, Active Word Choices
Show some #sass.

11. Active Voice Use it when: Subject is doing the action
You are confident in your answer
Someone is taking responsibility
Subject is doing the action
Subject-Verb-Object (SVO) word order
Usually shorter & more direct anyway!
Examples:
The United States refused to negotiate.
Negotiations were rejected by the United States.
Students earn their grades.
Grades were earned by the students.
The judge made a decision.
Passive: A decision was made by the judge.
Active Voice
My face when your sentences get to the point… #applause

12. Passive Voice Typically longer and less direct
Examples:
Mistakes were made.
Active: He made mistakes.
Letters are being mailed.
I mailed the letters.
Grades were passed out.
The teacher passed out grades.
He was fired.
Active: His boss fired him.
Typically longer and less direct
OVS word order (object-verb-subject)
Often has the word “by”
Often uses being verbs
Use it when:
You want to avoid responsibility or blame
You don’t want to throw anyone under the bus
You want to hide who did it
Passive Voice
My face when you take the long way to say it #ownit

13. Get to the Point Cut redundancy Cut unnecessary perfect tenses
Bad example: It is important and critical that everyone involved should immediately write down everything they have witnessed before they forget it.
Revised example: It is important for witnesses to write down what they saw before they forget any details.
Cut redundancy
Cut unnecessary perfect tenses
Cut adverbs and adjectives that aren’t needed
In SOME fields, shorter is preferred.
Business, medicine, journalism…
Short, simple sentences in strategic moments for dramatic effect or emphasis.
Get to the Point
My unimpressed face when you use FAR more words than needed to say something simple #notDickens #so1843

14. Formal Transitions Words & Phrases Entire Sentences Use the basics…
First, second, third, next
In addition
In conclusion, finally
…AND the better ones:
However, rather, instead
Therefore, moreover
Do NOT refer to yourself
“Next I will tell you about…”
“My next point…”
“As I mentioned before…”
Instead:
Next, …
As previously mentioned,
Formal Transitions
My face when you label your next point instead of just saying it… #spititout

15. Are you asking or telling me?
Bad: You might wonder, “Why do Olympians choke under pressure?”
Better: Viewers may wonder why Olympians struggle under pressure.
Don’t “ask yourself”, “wonder”, etc.
Don’t literally ask a question, hypothetical or real
Just state WHO wonders WHAT.
My face when you pose an actual question…
#writeinthirdperson
#notnecessary
Are you asking or telling me?

16. Don’t Talk About it – Just DO it!
Bad example: “Today I will teach you why Coke is better than Pepsi.”
Revised example: “Coke is superior to Pepsi for three reasons.”
Never talk directly about the (essay) writing itself.
Avoid:
“In this essay, I will…”
“Today I am going to…”
“For my next point, I will tell you…”
“My next reason is that…”
“All of my reasons prove that…”
“This quote proves my thesis because…”
Don’t Talk About it – Just DO it!
My face when you tell me what your essay will say… instead of just saying it. #Nike #justdoit

17. Bad: Smoking causes cancer.
Better: There is a direct correlation between smoking and cancer.
Bad: All marching band students get into Harvard.
Better: Students in the arts have a higher tendency to be admitted into Ivy league schools.
No word choices that are TOO extreme when they don’t apply!
Avoid:
Any, always, never, must, etc.
Be careful with “__ causes ___.”
Don’t say things that can’t be proven, are illogical, or are too difficult to believe.
(You don’t want to provoke someone into saying “Really?” or “Prove it.”)
Avoiding Absolutes
Tell me more about how you “always” are “literally” unable to get out of bed in the morning…#really #yeahright

18. Bonus Tips: Dead Giveaways
These are NOT absolute rules, but they are guidelines that COULD vary by genre, purpose, or audience.
Negatives
Don’t use parentheses
Avoid contractions
Avoid jargon (vocabulary your audience will not know)
Don’t attack anyone
Positives
Cite facts when possible
Acknowledge counterarguments
Bonus Tips: Dead Giveaways

19. What common advice have you noticed in all this advice?
How can you tell if writing is “formal” or “informal”?
When or why do you want to be able to write formally?
Opinion: What would be a good synonym for “formal” writing?
REVIEW Questions

20. This INTRODUCTION paragraph is from an essay about ***.
Reminders:
Slang and conversational word choices
Confident, active word choices
Active voice
Get to the point: Short sentences for dramatic effect
“Upgrading” your synonyms
Formal transitions
Taking out personal pronouns
Are you asking me, or are you telling me?
Don’t talk about it – just DO it.
Avoiding absolutes
People everywhere know that it’s like a crime to not send your kids to school. What people don’t know is that sending a kid to school is not enough; they also need to read to children at home. Students who are not read to enough won’t ever have lives as good as kids who read well. Early literacy is super important for learning vocabulary, getting reading skills, and building speaking fluency.
Revision Paragraph #1

21. This INTRODUCTION paragraph is from an essay about the importance of teaching young children to read.
Reminders:
Slang and conversational word choices
Confident, active word choices
Active voice
Get to the point: Short sentences for dramatic effect
“Upgrading” your synonyms
Formal transitions
Taking out personal pronouns
Are you asking me, or are you telling me?
Don’t talk about it – just DO it.
Avoiding absolutes
Most parents know that it is like a crime to not send your kids to school. However, parents may not know is that a child merely attending school is not enough; caregivers also need to read to children at home. Students who are not read to enough are more likely to suffer academically and financially in the long term, compared to kids who read well. Early literacy is super critical for acquiring vocabulary, developing reading skills, and building speaking fluency.
Paragraph #1: REVISED

22. This BODY paragraph is from a local letter to the editor about a tax levy on the ballot during an election season.
(Do you remember what kinds of words to cut, avoid, or use?)
Second, voters need to understand that effects will indubitably be felt economically by homeowners if we do not comprehensively support our schools. It is proven that lower-achieving schools cause home values to drop. If you do not pay up now, you will lose money when your house sells for less (or no one wants to buy it at all). Stop being cheap and support the future of our children AND our neighborhood!
Revision Paragraph #2

23. This BODY paragraph is from a local letter to the editor about a tax levy on the ballot during an election season.
(Do you remember what kinds of words to cut, avoid, or use?)
In addition, voters need to understand that homeowners may also feel economic effects will indubitably be felt economically by homeowners if they do not financially support our schools now. It is proven that Lower-achieving schools tend to cause home values to drop because the area is less appealing to potential buyers. If voters choose not to invest in the short term, they risk long term loss of property value. Choose the best investment possible: our children AND our homes.
Paragraph #2: REVISED

24. Get out one piece of your writing from this year.
Pick something that is not well-edited or was written informally.
HIGHLIGHT any words, phrases, or entire sentences that could be “upgraded” to more formal language.
Revise those spots by adding, deleting, or replacing words.
Get at least one other person to look at your changes. Did you miss any spots?
Do you think you succeeded in making the writing more formal? Why or why not?
Now YOU try!

25. List at least 5 things to avoid in formal writing:
List at least 3 things that you SHOULD do in formal writing.
3. Revise these sentences to be more formal (such as for a formal ): So, I really think that you should buy my Girl Scout cookies? They’re awesome (obviously), and they cause instant happiness. They’re healthier than they used to be, and money from the sales will be spent by my troop to go on a super epic canoeing trip.
Mini Quiz

26. List at least 5 things to avoid in formal writing:
Contractions
Passive voice
Pretentious words
Weak synonyms
Redundancy and wordiness
Personal pronouns
List at least 3 things that you SHOULD do in formal writing.
Active voice
Strong verbs and synonyms
Get to the point
Specifics/ no vague words
3. Revise these sentences to be more formal (such as for a formal ): Please consider purchasing Girl Scout cookies from Troop 100. This year’s options are delicious, and there is a correlation between the new ingredients and a lift in mood. Many of them have also dropped in calories and are comparatively more healthy than before. Troop 100 will use the proceeds for their annual canoe trip.
Mini Quiz: Answer Key