1. Lesson 9: Expressing Complaints
Makin’ It Work
Re-entering Community and the World of Work
Lesson 9:
Expressing Complaints
Revised for 2015
Module IV: Difficult Situations © 2015 by Steve Parese, Ed.D.
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2. What do you get out of this? How does it apply to you?
Pearl of Wisdom
“It’s not WHAT you say…
It’s HOW you say it.”
What do you get out of this? How does it apply to you?
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3. Today’s Lesson 1. Read new story about Nick
Today’s lesson will teach us a calm, professional way to express a legitimate complaint or concern in a difficult work-related situation.
1. Read new story about Nick
2. Learn five steps to Expressing Complaints
3. Practice using steps in mock situations
4. Review & MiniQuiz
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4. Questions after reading:
Nick’s Story 3
Let’s read along on page 54.
“Nick’s employment counselor helped him get a new job…”
Questions after reading:
1. What did Nick do wrong? What should he have done instead?
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5. About Expressing Complaints
Many times, people go into situations overpowered by their emotions or caught up in Thinking Traps. They make situations worse instead of better, because they don’t know how to say what they feel without escalating things.
Using these steps is not just about getting something off your chest, but doing it in a professional way that helps the other person understand what you want or need.
Follow along on WB p 55.
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6. “Expressing Complaints” Steps
1. Stop & Think
2. Ask to Talk
3. Explain without Blame
4. Ask for Help
5. End Positively
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7. Expressing Complaints with Nick
Let’s help Nick use this skill to do a better job of expressing his complaint.
1. Stop & Think
Staying calm and in control is essential when expressing a concern.
Write “STOP” in three places in the story when Nick should have used this skill.
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8. When and how should Nick have “Asked to Talk?”
Expressing Complaints with Nick
Let’s help Nick use this skill to do a better job of expressing his complaint.
2. Ask to Talk
Picking the right time and place to talk is important. So is using the right tone of voice and words.
When and how should Nick have “Asked to Talk?”
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9. What does Nick say that sounds BLAMING or ACCUSATORY?
Expressing Complaints with Nick
Let’s help Nick use this skill to do a better job of expressing his complaint.
3. Explain without Blame
Complaints should be professional and specific, not accusatory or vague.
What does Nick say that sounds BLAMING or ACCUSATORY?
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10. Explain what happened without blaming the other person.
3. Explain without Blame
Explain what happened without blaming the other person.
INTRODUCTION: What you want to talk about.
SITUATION: Just the FACTS of the situation. EFFECTS: How it is honestly affecting you.
Lorraine’s kids have the day off school, and are at home with her teenage sister, Jennifer. They’ve called 5 times this morning complaining that they’re bored. She feels like screaming at them, but instead she calls her sister at lunch and says:
“Jennifer, I need to talk with you about the calls I’m getting. The kids have called 5 times today complaining they’re bored. To be honest, I’m getting some looks from my boss, and I’m worried that I’m going to get in trouble.”
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11. John Explains without Blame
John works for a landscaping company. He doesn’t ask for many special favors, but his son’s last football game is coming up and John doesn’t want to disappoint him. He asked to get off a little early Friday afternoon, but it’s been 2 days and he hasn’t heard back from his supervisor yet.
Step 2: Ask to Talk: “Manny, can I see you when you have a minute?”
Step 3: Explain without Blame:
Introduction: “I want to ask you about _________________
Situation: “My son’s last game is Friday, and I haven’t ____
Effects: “I don’t want to put you in a bad spot, but _______
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12. Say something like: “I really want to work this out…”
Expressing Complaints with Nick
Let’s help Nick use this skill to do a better job of expressing his complaint.
4. Ask for Help
Say something like: “I really want to work this out…”
Then ask for the other person’s help understanding or solving the problem.
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13. John Asks for Help Step 4: Ask for Help:
John finishes explaining himself, then asks his supervisor for help:
Step 4: Ask for Help:
“I really want to work this out, Manny. What _________?”
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14. Expressing Complaints with Nick
Let’s help Nick use this skill to do a better job of expressing his complaint.
5. End Positively
Try to end positively and professionally, if possible. If not, at least avoid ending on a bad note.
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15. Complete the example on page 57.
Workin’ the Steps
Complete the example on page 57.
1. Tom & the Practical Jokers:
Tom is the new guy on a drywall crew, and has had a hard time fitting in. When he opens his lunch box today, he sees that it is filled with wet spackling compound (mud) -- yet another practical joke. He looks over at Sam, who smiles and says. “Hey, no hard feelings, right? Just a joke!”
Fill in the blanks to help Tom work the steps of “Expressing a Complaint.”
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16. Complete the example on page 57.
Workin’ the Steps
Complete the example on page 57.
2. Jake on a Smoke Break:
Jake has a job washing dishes in a small Italian restaurant. He’s taking a smoke break outside the back door, complaining about tomorrow’s 8:00 AM appointment with his P.O. His coworker Al pulls out a joint, lights up, and asks if he wants a hit. “Come on,” he teases. “It won’t kill you!” Jake shakes his head and walks away.
Fill in the blanks to help Jake work the steps of “Expressing a Complaint.”
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17. Complete the example on page 58.
Workin’ the Steps
Complete the example on page 58.
3. Tanisha and the Animal Shelter:
Tanisha’s been working part-time at an animal shelter, taking care of dogs and cats, cleaning up the grounds, helping with customers. She really likes her work, but it pays minimum wage and it’s only 2 days a week. Yesterday, they posted a full time opening that she would love to apply for, but she’s worried that they won’t even consider her because of her record.
Fill in the blanks to help Tanisha work the steps of “Expressing a Concern.”
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18. Complete the example on page 58.
Workin’ the Steps
Complete the example on page 58.
4. Anna Negotiates a Raise:
Anna has been working at the Carlton Hotel for 4 months now. She’s making $9.00/hour and really enjoys her work, and in another 2 months, she’s sup- posed to get a raise to $9.50/hour. Harvey offered her $9.75/hour to come work for him, and though the conditions might be a little sleazy, it’s a tempting offer. Anna decides to talk with her boss Chris, to see if the Carlton might be able to match Harvey’s offer.
Fill in the blanks to help Anna work the steps of “Expressing a Concern.”
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19. Questions after reading:
Nick: Take Two!
Let’s read along on page 59.
“Nick catches himself just before going into Mr. Taylor’s office…”
Questions after reading:
1. What did Nick do differently this time? How did his situation turn out?
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20. How will you Express YOUR Complaint?
Group Skit Activity
How will you Express YOUR Complaint?
Think about a difficult situation at work. How can you use these steps to express a legitimate complaint or concern in a professional way?
_______________________________________
Prepare small group skits to role play your stressful work situation and your calm professional response to it.
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21. Summary
Today, we’ve learned a step-by-step method for expressing a complaint when we’re upset about something in the workplace. We've read a story about Nick, and helped him find a better way to express himself. And we've practiced this important skill in role plays of our own.
In our next class, we'll focus on how to deal with criticism professionally.
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22. KEY POINT #1
The goal when expressing a legitimate complaint is to help others understand why we are upset so we can find a good solution to the problem
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23. KEY POINT #2
It is hard to express a complaint without sounding angry and making the problem worse.
Doing it calmly and professionally increases the chance that we will be heard, and possibly get what we want.
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24. Let’s complete the MiniQuiz in the workbook and review it as a group.√
Let’s complete the MiniQuiz in the workbook and review it as a group.
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25. Today’s Words of Wisdom:
“It’s not what you say,
it’s how you say it.”
How does this fit in with our lesson?
What is ONE THING you learned in this class that you will remember after leaving?
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