1. Persepolis Research Paper Issues

2. Issue #1 – No Proper Introduction
Many papers are starting off with their research topic or the book
Remember that you first need to grab the reader’s attention and then transition to your topic
Many papers are not providing general background of their research topics and the graphic novel
You must mention the T.A.G. in the introduction
Don’t provide details you will repeat in the body of your paper

3. Issue #2 – Weak thesis At this point, your thesis needs to be specific
You should state the exact effects you will be writing about in your paper

4. Issue #3 – Poor topic sentences
Each body paragraph must begin with your own idea that you will prove in the paragraphs
It should not start with a fact about your topic or anything else that involves research
Examples:
Alexander the Great destroyed Persepolis around 330 B.C. (bad example – fact)
The destruction of Persepolis was a significant event in history (good and provable)

5. Issue #4: Incorrect facts
You MUST understand the topic and the book and display your understanding in your paper
Some things I’ve seen so far:
Marji and her family DO NOT live in Persepolis – they live in Tehran
Reza Shah and Muhammed Reza Shah are two different people, not the same person
The Shah was NOT a communist
The Shah did NOT force people to wear the veil

6. Issue #5: Poor organization
Your paper must follow the order from the assignment sheet
1) Detailed information about the person/event
2) The impact that this person/event had on others/the world (NOT on Marji and her family)
3) A brief summary of the role this person/event plays in Persepolis.
4) How this person/event affected Marji and the country of Iran in the graphic novel
This means you should not start writing about Persepolis until the third section of your paper!

7. Issue #6 – Lack of transitions
You need transitions between ideas in your paragraphs
You especially need to have a transition when you begin to write about the book in section 3
Example:
Leon Trotsky also played a significant role in the graphic novel Persepolis.

8. Issue #7 – No support from Persepolis
When writing about the graphic novel, you MUST use quotes.
Each paragraph about Persepolis should have at least one direct quote from the book
Places to use quotes:
When showing your research topic’s involvement in the book
When showing how your research topic affects Marji and/or her family
When showing how your research topic affects Iran in the book

9. Issue #8 – Poor usage of signal phrases
Signal phrases MUST name the author if there is an author
If no author, they MUST name the article title
Many people are naming web sites, databases, or encyclopedia titles, which is incorrect
Examples:
According to Brittannica School (incorrect – this is the database)
History.com reports that… (bad – that is the web page)
According to the article “Trotsky, Leon” from the Encyclopedia Brittannica (good – names the article title since there is no author)
Ellen James, writer for the History Channel web site, reports that…(good – names the author)

10. Issue #9 – Unnecessary or Incorrect Parenthetical Citations
When you use signal phrases, you only use parenthetical citations if there are page numbers
You DO NOT put paragraph numbers in parentheses
Some of you are putting a signal phrase and parenthetical citation that names the author or article title, which is wrong
Some of you aren’t using signal phrases at all and are only using parenthetical citations
If you don’t have signal phrases, you can’t get to the highest level of the rubric for citations