1. Self-Disclosure and Feedback
9: Interpersonal
Self-Disclosure and Feedback
CA 104 (Aitken)

2. Self-disclosure Feedback
Divulging biographical data, personal ideas, and feelings
Feedback
Verbal and nonverbal responses a message
CA 104 (Aitken)

3. Managing Privacy
“Making a conscious decision to withhold information or feelings from a relational partner.”
Self-disclosure and privacy are cyclical and should be balanced to manage the dialectical tension between openness and closedness.
CA 104 (Aitken)

4. Women tend to engage in “rapport talk” to share experiences and establish bonds.
Microsoft Photo
CA 104 (Aitken)

5. Men tend to engage in “report talk” to share information, negotiate, and preserve independence.
Microsoft Photo
CA 104 (Aitken)

6. Appropriate Self-disclosure
Self-disclose the kind of information you want others to disclose to you.
Self-disclose more intimate information only when you believe the disclosure represents an acceptable risk.
Continue intimate self-disclosure only if it is reciprocated.
Move self-disclosure to deeper levels gradually.
Reserve intimate or very personal self-disclosure for ongoing relationships.
CA 104 (Aitken)

7. self-disclosure has the greatest positive effects.
Reciprocal
self-disclosure
has the greatest
positive effects.
CA 104 (Aitken)

8. Skills for Self Disclosure and Privacy Management
Owning feelings and opinions
Making “I” statements
People often don’t do this for two reasons
To strengthen the power of their statements
To escape responsibility
CA 104 (Aitken)

9. Masking Feelings Displaying Feelings
Concealing verbal or nonverbal cues that would enable others to understand how a person is feeling
Displaying Feelings
Expressing feelings through facial reactions, body responses, or paralinguistic reactions
CA 104 (Aitken)

10. Describing Feelings
Describing feelings is the skill of naming the emotions you are feeling without judging them
Increases the likelihood of having a positive interaction and decreases the chances of creating defensiveness
BUT…many people don’t describe their feelings regularly. Why?
CA 104 (Aitken)

11. Managing Privacy Disclosure may make you vulnerable
People might judge you
Might cause harm to others or the relationship
What to do if pressed to disclose something that you are not comfortable sharing
Change the subject
Tell a “white lie”
CA 104 (Aitken)

12. Asking for Feedback Can deepen relationships Can gain self-knowledge
How to prepare to receive feedback
Think of feedback as in your best interest
Make sure you are ready for an honest response
Take the initiative to avoid surprises
CA 104 (Aitken)

13. Asking for Feedback (2) Specify the kind of feedback you are seeking
Try to avoid negative verbal and nonverbal reactions to feedback
Paraphrase what you hear
Show gratitude for the feedback
CA 104 (Aitken)

14. Giving Personal Feedback
Describing
Behavior
Recounting
specific actions
of another
without commenting
on appropriateness
Constructive
Criticism
Describes the
negative
behaviors of
another
and their effects
CA 104 (Aitken)

15. Giving Constructive Criticism
Begin by describing the behavior
Whenever possible, preface a negative statement with a positive one
Be as specific as possible.
When appropriate, suggest how the person can change the behavior.
CA 104 (Aitken)

16. Praising
“Describing the specific positive behaviors or accomplishments of another and the effects that this behavior has on others.”
CA 104 (Aitken)