1. Count Theme Essay Outline Feedback

2. Writers beware! I did not check your outlines for grammatical errors.
Be sure to edit your essays! Remember:
No 1st & 2nd person pronouns
No slang/idioms
No contractions
Literary present tense
Minimal use of weak verbs and adverbs
Watch out for repetitiveness!
Avoid vague and awkward wording
Do not use the words, this quote shows or this quote proves.

3. Remember the following:
Your essay must clearly prove Dumas’ worldview
(This should be emphasized in your COMMENTARY)
example: This example clearly reveals Dumas’ belief that…
Within each body paragraph, your examples MUST follow the order of the plot.
Within each body paragraph, remember the topic you are proving. If your context/proof/commentary does not relate back to the paragraph topic, you have not proved your point.

4. 4. You must have AT LEAST one FULL sentence of SPECIFIC context before your blended quote. One full sentence is an absolute minimum and may not be sufficient context.
5. Be sure your examples show VARIETY! (e.g. Max and Val are not the only characters who demonstrate love.)
6. Save your own personal thoughts/applications for the conclusion paragraph. Remember, you are proving Dumas’ worldview, not your own.

6. Reminders about introduction and conclusion paragraphs…

7. Introduction must: Be 4-5 sentences long
Begin with a general attention grabber
End with your thesis statement, which should include the author’s full name and the name of the book (italicized)
Sandwiched between the attention grabber and thesis statement should be 2-3 sentences of background information. This could include facts about the author, historical context, or brief plot information.
Introduction should be structured like a funnel: Starting broad and narrowing down to your specific thesis.

8. Conclusion must:
Begin by revisiting, not repeating, your thesis statement. (First 1-2 sentences)
Wrap up your essay without being overly repetitive. This would be a great place to insert your own personal conclusions/applications (without using 1st person, of course!)
Final sentence should reflect your opener and draw the essay to a close.

9. Blending quotations:
Choose only the words you need, the minimum you need to make your point.. Eliminate all others.
Remove or replace all 1st and 2nd person pronouns, along with ambiguous pronouns. Remove contractions. Remove dialogue. When replacing or changing words within a quote, always use brackets.
Blend your own words with the quoted material to make the sentence flow.
No block quotes! Quoted material should never exceed three lines.
Check your verb tense to be sure verbs are written in literary present tense unless past tense is appropriate.
Check yourself! Read the sentence as if the quotation punctuation has been removed. If your sentence reads well, you have done your job!

10. Practice time!
“’tell them I was her fiance!’ continued Maximillian, ‘tell them she was my only love, tell them this corpse belongs to me’” (Dumas 433) (A)

11. “’I will stay too’ He stood up, solemnly stretched out his hand over the old man and said, ‘I swear by the blood of Christ that I will never leave you while you still are alive’” (Dumas 52) (A)

12. “’I will stay too’ He stood up, solemnly stretched out his hand over the old man and said, ‘I swear by the blood of Christ that I will never leave you while you still are alive’” (Dumas 52) (A)

13. “I myself have been bitten by the serpent I was watching” (Dumas 427)
“I myself have been bitten by the serpent I was watching” (Dumas 427). (A,B)

14. “Tell the angel who will watch over your life to pray now and then for a man, who, like Satan, believed himself for an instant to be equal to God, but who realized in all humility that supreme power and wisdom are in the hands of God alone” (Dumas 530). (A,B)

15. “’Fernand. ’ roared Monte Cristo
“’Fernand!’ roared Monte Cristo. ‘One of my names is enough to strike terror into your heart, but I don’t have to tell you what it is, do I? You’ve already guessed it, haven’t you? Or rather, you remember it, for, in spite of all my years of sorrow and torment, the joy of vengeance has made my face young again, and it’s a face you must have seen often in your dreams ever since you married Mercedes, my fiancee!’ The general…backed out of the room, uttering, only this piercing terror-stricken cry: ‘Edmond Dantes!’” (Dumas ). (B)

16. “’Tell them I was her Fiance
“’Tell them I was her Fiance!’ Continued Maximilien, ‘tell them she was my only love in the world! Tell them this corpse belongs to me!’ And the young man, presenting the terrible spectacle of great strength being shattered, fell heavily to his knees beside the bed’” (Dumas 360). (B)

17. “ (Dumas )