1. Proactive Responses to Lying
For Foster/Adoptive Parents

2. Expectations?

3. Training Outcomes: Clarify values regarding lying;
Identify reasons children who lie;
Respond appropriately to children who lie;
Make plans to prevent lying.

4. To Tell the Truth… Warm-Up

5. Lying Making an untrue statement with intent to deceive
Creating a false or misleading impression

6. Reasons Adults Become Upset:

7. Typical Reactions to Lying:

8. The Best Lie Ever Told… By a politician; In an advertisement;
To a police officer for speeding;
By a child in care;
By someone in this group.

9. Reasons People Lie:

10. Cycle of Need
Expression
Response
Relaxation
Need

11. Cycle of Mistrust
Expression
Response
Distress
Need

12. Tricks, Lies and Parenting
“Your room is a mess. Turn off the TV now and go clean it up!”

13. Liar! Did you clean your room? Yep!
Don’t tell me you cleaned your room. I just walked by and its still a pig pen! Why lie to me? I hate that!

14. Where have you been? At Jimmy’s.
NO, YOU WERE NOT! I spoke with his mom and she hasn’t seen you all day. You’re grounded! Don’t you EVER lie to me again!!

15. I need to talk with you. Huh? About what?
Well, you said you were going to Jimmy’s and I know you didn’t. Its important to me to be able to trust you.
What’s going on?

16. Goals of Discipline Complete the Cycle of Need
Learn healthy ways to meet needs
Feel good about relationships with others
Build self-esteem
Services.

17. I will use information from this training to:
__________________________

18. Acknowledgement Disclaimer
This document is provided under a contractual agreement between the
New York State Office of Children and Family Services
Division of Administration
Bureau of Training and Development
AND
State University of New York College at Buffalo
Acknowledgement
This material was developed by the SUNY Buffalo State, Institute for Community Health Promotion (ICHP), Center for Development of Human Services (CDHS) under a training and administrative services agreement with the New York State Office of Children and Family Services.
Disclaimer
While every effort has been made to provide accurate and complete information, the Office of Children and Family Services and the State of New York assume no responsibility for any errors or omissions in the information provided herein and make no representations or warranties about the suitability of the information contained here for any purpose. All information and documents are provided “as is,” without a warranty of any kind.
Copyright © 2015 by the New York State Office of Children and Family Services

19. Area code and phone number
Unregistered and want training credit? Before class ends, enter the following into (private) text chat to the instructor or to the in-class tech support:
Full legal name
Male or female
Home address (NO P.O. boxes)
Area code and phone number
address (2 on same computer must list 2 addresses)
Foster care agency address (e.g., Harlem Dowling, Westside Center, th Ave, NY, NY 10027)
Thank you.