1. Welcoming students, asking them how their day has been (revisiting previous talks), etc.

2. Healthy Relationships 101
#RelationshipGoals
Introduction to the Topic  #relationshipgoals. This is all about healthy relationships. Consider asking the class how many are dating and how many are single. Consider asking the class if any relationships at their school would best be described as unhealthy relationships? Maybe even ask how they know whether a relationship is unhealthy or not. Have some fun with this. Explain that everyone is welcome with this talk, and that even single people will be able to contribute (even if they have never dated) because when it comes to relationships, everyone is looking for something (and we might not all be quite as different as we think)…
Healthy Relationships 101

3. Fantasy vs. Reality Love at First Sight They are Perfect
I Can Change Them
My Soul Mate
Loves Takes Time
Everyone Fights
People Change Themselves
My Best Friend
Do not fall for the fantasy of dating (that we see in movies). Love at first sight, thinking someone is perfect, or that if they aren’t all that perfect that you can change them, assuming someone is your soul mate because you have like 20 or 30 things in common.
In reality, love takes time. Don’t get fooled by rushing into a relationship before you truly know that person. And everyone fights. Even the best healthy relationships have rough spots, but couples work through those times with love and care and respect. And you cannot change someone (two halves do not make a whole in the realm of dating… two wholes make a whole). And it would probably be better do date a best friend than a soul mate.

4. Deal Breakers vs. Deal Makers
Cheating
Violence
Verbal Abuse
Control
Pressure
Clingy
Attraction
Humor
Trust
Fun
Communication
Faithful
Open with asking the class to name the ‘deal breakers’ of relationships – things that go on in the world of dating that they would NOT put up with (i.e. what would cause them to want to end a relationship). On the reverse side, ask the class to name the ‘deal makers’ of relationships – things that go on in the world of dating that they WANT and are seeking (i.e. what would cause them to be happy and feel good about a relationship). Discuss the differences between these two lists.
Transition: it is important to have lists like these, because how we approach dating seems to separate us into a few different categories….

5. Deal Breakers Deal Makers
The Dating Continuum
Deal Breakers Deal Makers
Jealousy
Intimidation
Anger
Cheating
Insecurity
Bad Habits
Trust
Respect
Care
Devotion
Confidence
Communication
Add to the already existing list ‘insecurity’ (if someone threatens to hurt themselves when things go wrong and you think about breaking up with them… essentially blackmailing you into staying with them) and ‘bad habits’ (things like drugs, acting two-faced, drinking, etc. that could end up producing a really destructive person).
Offset those deal breakers with deal makers that can be found in all healthy relationships, and turn the question on each student and their relationship (present or future). Are they healthy or unhealthy relationships?
What About You?

6. Communication: Personal thoughts becoming language that seeks out understanding
Communication is like playing darts. Those who hit the target most often are effective in the game.
Communication is the most essential part of any relationship (dating, friendship, working, teammates, parents, etc.)

7. Communication: Personal thoughts becoming language that seeks out understanding
The Meaning is found:
7% Words
38% Tone of Voice
55% Body Language
Approaching Conflict Resolution:
In Love – I care about you more than how you feel about me.
In humility – I may be wrong
With Pre Forgiveness – The intent to forgive
With 100% Truth – Honesty
The meaning of what we are attempting to convey or explain found more in how we say it than what we say.
Conflict Resolution is sometimes the hardest thing to accomplish because typically it is emotionally charged. Utilizing this mind set will allow for more resolutions and less escalation.
IN LOVE: Showing value for the relationship by not doing things to intensify the conflict; no retaliation.
IN HUMILITY: Resolutions are not always about who's right and who’s wrong
PRE-FORGIVENESS: Having hope for the positive outcome not looking for reasons to hold a grudge
100% TRUTH: No half truths. A half truth is a whole lie. Considerate vs. Sugarcoating. Blunt vs. Honesty

8. When You Are the One Doing It
The Dirt on Breaking Up
When You Are the One Doing It
It is Okay to Break Up
Be Clear in What You Say
Work to Stay Broken Up
Get Support
Forgive Yourself
Forgive Your Ex
When It Happens To You
It is Okay to Grieve
Create Separation
Get Support
You Will Survive This
You Are Not Alone
You Are More Than Your Relationship
So if you find yourself in a less than ideal relationship, remember that it is okay to break up. If you need to end it with that other person, make sure you are clear in what you say to them (i.e. it is over, we are broken up), and work to stay broken up. Avoid them, surround yourself with people who will help you get through it, forgive yourself for anything stupid you did while dating, and forgive them for anything they put you through. Consider that to be an old chapter of your life, and move on to the next one (and promise yourself it will be better).
Now if someone breaks up with you, remember that it is okay to grieve and be upset. You probably gave your heart to that person (maybe more), so it will hurt. But in order to move on, you have to create separation from them and find people who will support you and work to make you normal again. Just remember… as serious as high school relationships feel sometimes, you will survive this, you are never alone (people get broken up with all the time, and there is support out there for you), and you are more than your relationship.

9. Your Dating Future Predators Protectors Pressure People Sexually
Angry/Controlling
Ask for Naked Pictures
Desire Friends with Benefits
Low Self-Esteem
Protectors
No Sexual Pressure
In Control of Anger
Committed and Trustworthy
Makes You Feel Secure
Strong and Confident
Last thing on dating – your future (based on how you approach dating). Most Type A personalities fall into two different categories when it comes to dating (predators and protectors). Predators are all about taking advantage of other people, selflessly serving themselves, and building up walls to hide their low self-esteem. Protectors, on the other hand, are all about treating people well, making them feel loved, and being secure in themselves in a relationship. Each of these things displays different actions and characteristics. If you are dating someone, think about which things you see more of…

10. Your Dating Future Targets Treasures Sexually Willing
Overly Flirtatious
Attention Seeking Behavior
Use Clothes or Body to Attract
Low Self-Image
Treasures
Don’t Feel Pressured to Use Sex or Body
Not Desperate for a Date
Intelligent
Prefers to Show Class
High Self-Image
And if you are a more passive person, you typically qualify as either a target or a treasure. Targets are people who are dying for attention, usually because they have a low self-image and do not like themselves. As a result, they will do just about anything to feel loved or desired, even if that means doing sexual stuff, sending pics, or being overly flirtatious. Meanwhile, treasures are individuals who don’t need to go searching for love because they already know how valuable they are. As a result, they do not feel pressured to conform in a certain way, they are not desperate, and they wait for the love they know they deserve.
Everyone deserves the absolute best when it comes to dating – so the million dollar question is “why would you settle for anything less than you deserve?” You shouldn’t.