1. Conflict Resolution Text Journal Read pg. 193-200, Do “Think” pg. 209
Both of your parents want you to come for Thanksgiving Dinner. How can you avoid hurting feelings and resolve the issue?

2. Quarreling is Normal It is not a sign of a bad marriage.
A marriage without some disagreement is emotionally undernourished.
It helps to blend needs, tastes and goals.
Anger is better expressed than hoarded.

3. Constructive vs. Destructive “Rules for Fighting Fairly”
No hitting.
No personality attack.
Attack the problem.
Fight in private.
Fighting in front of the children once in a while is okay if it is constructive and if you do not make them take sides.

4. Constructive vs. Destructive “Rules for Fighting Fairly”
Fight it out at the time, if you can.
No refusing to quarrel or withdrawing before it is finished.
Talk one at a time and listen when the other is talking.
No mind reading.
Come to a conclusion, then let it end; compromise, if your can. Give in occasionally, agree to disagree.

5. Patterns Change
Your arguments will change depending on what is going on in your life.
Initial adjustment, moving, changing jobs
Children become a source of conflict; childless couples quarrel less.
Strain, fatigue, less sex life, jealousy, discipline
Arguing decreases when the children grow up and leave home, unless they were a buffer between you.

6. Do Not Trifle Over Trivia
Which way the toilet paper rolls.
Turning down page corners instead of using a bookmark.
Eating or not eating in bed.
Reading the instructions before you put something together.
Holidays with in-laws.
Doing the laundry regularly.
Putting the video tapes away.
Leaving damp washcloths scrunched in a lump.
Squeezing the toothpaste in the middle.
Taking the “Do not remove” tags off of pillows.

7. Peaceful Solutions to Marital Problems

8. State #3 Marital Conflict

9. Internet
Conflict Resolution Quiz