1. The FOUR Conversations
DAILY COMMUNICATION
THAT GETS RESULTS
Jeffrey Ford and Laurie Ford

2. “Talk is the lifeblood of managerial work”
Deborah Tannen
The Power of Talk
Harvard Business Review

3. Objectives for today: Introduce the Four Conversations from our book
Identify the elements of effective workplace communication
Assist you in connecting these ideas to your own workplace communication

4. Self-Assessment Worksheet
What are you working on? 1. 2. 3.
How’s it going? 1.
Which of the 9 limitations do you have in your workplace?
Lateness
Poor work quality
Difficult people
Lack of teamwork
Poor planning and workload overwhelm
Insufficient resources and support
Complaints
Blaming
Gossip
Have participants fill out their Exercise: Limitations at Work handout. Answer two questions:
How serious are these limitations in your workplace? Rate each one on a scale of 1 (not a problem) to 5 (a big problem, costs resources or morale)
Why do you think they happen?

5. Limitations to a Successful Workplace
Lateness
Poor work quality
Difficult people
Lack of teamwork
Poor planning and workload overwhelm
Insufficient resources and support
Lack of accountability

6. Unproductive Conversations
COMPLAINTS
BLAMING
GOSSIP
Unproductive conversations - Complaints, blaming, gossiping
Complaints – usually lack commitment
Blaming – undermines accountability
Gossip – reduces trust

7. Four Productive Conversations
#1. Initiative Conversations Introduce a new goal, propose an idea, or launch a change in a positive way to attract people to follow your leadership

8. Four Productive Conversations
#2. Understanding Conversations Have people create their own role in the new initiative by asking useful questions and contributing good ideas

9. Four Productive Conversations
#3. Performance Conversations Support people in getting into action by making requests, making promises, and establishing agreements for performance

10. Four Productive Conversations
#4. Closure Conversations Help people put the past behind them and move forward with credibility, a positive attitude, and a sense of accomplishment

11. All Four Conversations are Important
Initiative conversations - Give people enthusiasm, interest, and purpose
Understanding conversations – Help people engage, step up to participation
Performance conversations – Support getting accurate, complete, and on time results
Closure conversations – Avoid a buildup of resentment, cynicism, or mistrust

12. Self-Assessment Worksheet
Strong? Need work?
1. Initiative Conversations
2. Understanding Conversations
3. Performance Conversations
4. Closure Conversations
Which of the 9 limitations do you have in your workplace?
Lateness
Poor work quality
Difficult people
Lack of teamwork
Poor planning and workload overwhelm
Insufficient resources and support
Complaints
Blaming
Gossip
Have participants fill out their Exercise: Limitations at Work handout. Answer two questions:
How serious are these limitations in your workplace? Rate each one on a scale of 1 (not a problem) to 5 (a big problem, costs resources or morale)
Why do you think they happen?

13. Use the “Accomplishment Ingredients”
To help someone accomplish something, even a small task, include “Accomplishment ingredients”:
What are we trying to accomplish?
When do we want to accomplish it?
Why is this accomplishment important?
If you leave one ingredient out, there is no opportunity for accomplishment.
Conversations might be missing important ingredients – such as not saying What you want, or When or Why you want it.
To help people accomplish something, even a small task, remember to add the “Accomplishment ingredients”:
What are we trying to accomplish?
When do we want to accomplish it?
Why is this accomplishment important?
What happens if you leave one out? (get examples from participants)

14. … And the Resource Ingredients
To support people’s accomplishment, add “Resource ingredients” to your conversation:
Who else is involved?
Where will the resources come from?
And Where will the results go?
How will it get done?
If you leave one ingredient out, there is confusion about resources and participation.
Conversations might be missing important ingredients – such as not saying Who else is involved, or Where the resources or benefits are going to be, or How things will get done.
To help people accomplish something, even a small task, remember to add the “Resource ingredients”:
Who are the key players? Who else will be involved?
Where will the resources come from? Where will the benefits show up? Where are the key players and customers located?
How will we do this? How will the work get done? How can we plan the work and the resources to get the results we want?
What happens if you leave one out? (get examples from participants)

15. Self-Assessment Worksheet
THE FOUR CONVERSATIONS My strengths? Weaknesses?
Self-Assessment Worksheet
Always Say These?
1. ACCOMPLISHMENT Ingredients
What – When - Why
2. RESOURCE Ingredients
Who – Where - How
Which of the 9 limitations do you have in your workplace?
Lateness
Poor work quality
Difficult people
Lack of teamwork
Poor planning and workload overwhelm
Insufficient resources and support
Complaints
Blaming
Gossip
Have participants fill out their Exercise: Limitations at Work handout. Answer two questions:
How serious are these limitations in your workplace? Rate each one on a scale of 1 (not a problem) to 5 (a big problem, costs resources or morale)
Why do you think they happen?

16. Key Points to Remember Some conversations slow things down
The Four Conversations are productive:
Initiative, Understanding, Performance, Closure
Productive conversations have Accomplishment and Resource Ingredients
Key Points to Remember
Some conversations are not productive
Four conversations are productive:
Initiative, Understanding, Performance, Closure
Conversations need six ingredients:
What-When-Why and Who-Where-How
Most problems, in work and in the rest of life, can be resolved with conversation
Most problems at work, and in life, can be resolved with productive conversations

17. How – and Why – to Use The Four Conversations

18. Initiative Conversations: Create a Future
Leadership is not about position, title, or authority.
Leadership is about conversations for a future.

19. Land A Man on the Moon…
“I believe that this nation should commit itself to achieving the goal, before this decade is out, of landing a man on the moon and returning him safely to the earth. No single space project in this period will be more impressive to mankind, or more important for the long-range exploration of space; and none will be so difficult or expensive to accomplish. Let it be clear – and this is a judgment which the Members of the Congress must finally make – let it be clear that I am asking the Congress and the country to accept a firm commitment to a new course of action, a course which will last for many years and carry very heavy costs. If we are to go only half way, or reduce our sights in the face of difficulty, in my judgment it would be better not to go at all.”
President John F. Kennedy Speech to Joint Session of Congress
May 25, 1961
This is an initiative conversation – it is speaking for a future and inviting others to share in fulfilling that future. This is not some “pipe dream”, nor some “idle chatter”, it is a committed conversation in which President Kennedy is putting his name and the weight of the Presidency behind a proposal. This is not simply a “good idea” – it is a serious, no kidding commitment to a future. It is, in the language of this book, and Initiative Conversation

20. Initiative: Propose an Accomplishment
What: Propose an idea for an attractive and worthwhile future
Stay positive, focus on the future we want, not the one we want to avoid
When: Propose a timeline
Why: Show people the value of making it happen

21. Self-Assessment Worksheet
With regard to what YOU are working on… 1. 2.
Where can you benefit from using stronger Initiative conversations?
_____________________
Which of the 9 limitations do you have in your workplace?
Lateness
Poor work quality
Difficult people
Lack of teamwork
Poor planning and workload overwhelm
Insufficient resources and support
Complaints
Blaming
Gossip
Have participants fill out their Exercise: Limitations at Work handout. Answer two questions:
How serious are these limitations in your workplace? Rate each one on a scale of 1 (not a problem) to 5 (a big problem, costs resources or morale)
Why do you think they happen?

22. Tips: Initiative Conversations
Get all necessary authorities aligned on the goal and talking about resources
Plan your Initiative Conversation to get people’s attention and jumpstart new thinking
Don’t over-initiate: see things through
Most common mistake: Assuming people remember what they are working toward.

23. Understanding Conversations: Include and Engage
Get people involved.
Clarify and explain.
It takes dialogue.

24. Understanding Conversations
Say What you want, When, and Why
Then engage people in creating the plan. Ask:
Who should be involved? Who are our customers? Suppliers?
Where are the people and resources we need?
How can we be successful? How does this change my job?
Then LISTEN…

25. IF they know and understand THEN they will take the right actions
The “No-Action” Trap
IF they know and understand THEN they will take the right actions
There is a particular trap that occurs with understanding conversations. We call it the “No Action Trap” because it results in no action being taken. The structure of the trap is, If other people know and understand what is required, needed, expected, etc, then they will take the right actions. But it doesn’t work that way. How many of you want to lose weight or be more physically fit. Do you already know how to do that? So, you know and understand what is required, but you aren’t doing it.
ASK: Can you see places where you have run into the “No Action Trap”? What were these?

26. Self-Assessment Worksheet
They’ve seem to understand the initiative, but they aren’t participating in the discussion.
ASK: Do they have ideas on Who to contact? Where the resources might be? How the work could get done?
Where are you waiting for someone to get engaged? 1. 2.
Which of the 9 limitations do you have in your workplace?
Lateness
Poor work quality
Difficult people
Lack of teamwork
Poor planning and workload overwhelm
Insufficient resources and support
Complaints
Blaming
Gossip
Have participants fill out their Exercise: Limitations at Work handout. Answer two questions:
How serious are these limitations in your workplace? Rate each one on a scale of 1 (not a problem) to 5 (a big problem, costs resources or morale)
Why do you think they happen?

27. Tips: Understanding Conversations
Use a Q&A format: you want input!
- What needs to be done to accomplish this?
- What is a good schedule for us to do it?
- Are there any good measures of success?
Repeat as needed: What we want, When we want it, and Why it matters
Stand by your initiative, but be willing to collaborate for the goal and the plan
Bonus: New knowledge, new vocabulary, new solutions.

28. Performance Conversations: Ask and Promise
Make requests and get commitments.
Performance rarely happens spontaneously.
Performance Conversations:
Ask and Promise
Make requests and set up agreements.
Performance rarely happens spontaneously.

29. What is “Performance”? Taking an action Producing a result
Delivering a service or communication
NOTE:
Understanding does not cause performance.

30. The Foundation of Performance
Request
+ Promise
= Agreement
What action or result do you want?
By When do you want it?
Why does it matter?

31. The Likelihood of Taking Action
Condition
Likelihood of
Taking Action
If you hear an idea
If you consciously decide to adopt it
If you decide when you will do it
If you plan how you will do it
If you commit to someone else you will do it
10%
25%
40%
50%
SAY: How likely is it that someone will take action on an idea? There was a study done by ASTD in which they investigated this very question.
65% is around the average chance that people will take action - I obtained this from managers in my Mastery of Execution class.
In general, the managers tend to be more reliable than the people they work with.
65%

32. Make Requests Ask! Will you do What is wanted?
Be specific about the results
Will you do it When it is needed?
Give and get deadlines
Do you understand Why is it important?
People need a context
Yes, you have to ask.

33. Responses to Requests ACCEPT DECLINE COUNTER- OFFER
There are 3 ways to respond to a request:
Accept: Yes, I agree to provide the action or result at the time requested
Decline: No, I do not agree to do that.
Straight talk
Covert: Saying yes, Doing no
Counteroffer: No, I do not agree to that, but I propose an alternative.
Remember:
Saying “Yes” is a Promise
Saying No is Sometimes Necessary
ACCEPT
DECLINE
COUNTER-
OFFER

34. Make a Request – Ask!
Will you update me on the status of the computer conversion project in today’s 3:00 pm staff meeting so that I am prepared to answer the CIO’s questions?
Can you approve my proposal before Friday so that I can submit it for Developmental Funding?
Please pick up a pizza on the way home from work today for Patty’s slumber party.

35. When They Accept Your Request
Get a “good promise”.
Are they clear on WHAT, by WHEN, and WHY?
Are they available?
Do they have the necessary resources?
Is there anything in the way?
Are they saying “Yes”?
Request + Promise = Agreement
PROMISE
Promises = Agreements for What-When-Why, and… Who-Where-How
Who can make the promise?
Where will the resources be? Where will the results go?
How Will the Job Get Done?
Request + Promise = Agreement means that the accomplishment AND resource ingredients are all present.
Are they clear on WHAT is being asked for, BY WHEN, and WHY?
It helps to have a Checklist or Work Plan
Are they available to do the work?
It helps if they check their calendars.
Do they have the necessary resources or know where to get them?
Is there anything that could prevent them from succeeding?
Are they accepting the request? Are they saying yes?

36. Make a Promise – Commit!
I will update you on the status of the computer conversion project in today’s 3:00 pm staff meeting so that you are prepared to answer the CIO’s questions.
I will approve your proposal before Friday so that you can submit it for Developmental Funding.
Yes, I will pick up a pizza on my way home from work today for Patty’s slumber party.
All ingredients are included in the Request + Promise = Agreement:
What – When – Why – Who – Where - How

37. Performance Conversations: It’s About Agreements
Confirm the Agreement
Your expectations are not their promises
Manage the Agreement
Help people remember
Make promises public

38. Self-Assessment Worksheet
With regard to the things you are working on, identify and write out two requests you could make to get what you want.   1.   2.
EXERCISE: GETTING WHAT YOU WANT (fill out the form, then paired-share)
Identify one or two people and something you would like from each of them.
What do you want? Who can do that for you, or deliver it to you?
Write out the requests you would make to have them give you what you want.

39. Closure Conversations: Create Endings
An incomplete past
can prevent a new future.
Closure Conversations: Create Endings
An incomplete past
can prevent a new future.

40. Closure Conversations
Create accomplishment.
-- We finished the project.
Create acknowledgment.
Thank you for the work you did on ….”
Create completion.
What worked? What didn’t?
Close the book on past goals, requests, promises.

41. The Likelihood of Taking Action
Condition
Likelihood of
Taking Action
If you hear an idea
If you consciously decide to adopt it
If you decide when you will do it
If you plan how you will do it
If you commit to someone else you will do it
10%
25%
40%
50%
Remember this chart and how the likelihood of someone taking actions goes up to 65% when a promise is made.
But look what happens if you schedule a closure conversations with the person to whom you have made the promise – the likelihood of you taking action goes to 95%.
Getting Good Promises AND Following through with Closure Conversations BUILDS ACCOUNTABILITY. The promises tell me what I am accountable for (Result x by time y) and the closure conversations ask me to account for my promise.
65%
If you have a specific accountability-appointment with the person you made the promise to
95%

42. Build a Reputation for Closure
Make appointments to follow up
Let people know you are tracking your to- do’s (and their promises)
Create completion for yourself and others

43. Three A’s of Closure Acknowledge the facts: Say what’s so
Address persistent complaints and conditions
Appreciate the people
Recognize accomplishment & contribution
Apologize for mistakes & misunderstandings
Take responsibility, even if you didn’t “do it”

44. Applying the Three “A’s”
I am acknowledging that we are starting late. We agreed to begin at 9AM, it is now 9:10. I also want to thank each of you for being here. I know there is a lot going on with all the remodeling, and it would have been easy to use that as an excuse for not attending. Thank you for making it to this meeting. Finally, I apologize for not getting the agenda to you before yesterday, and for any misunderstanding or last-minute work that may have created for you.

45. Amend Broken Agreements
The 4th “A” of Closure
Amend Broken Agreements
Recognize
Report status
Repair
Amend Broken Agreements
Recognize that an agreement has been broken. State the broken agreement to the person or group who has broken the agreement. You don’t need to be critical or make anyone wrong – just the facts: we did not keep our promise.
Report on the status: What exactly is incorrect, missing, or obsolete?
Repair it: handle the consequences. What are the costs, to you or others, of the broken agreement? What can be done to make amends, or repair the damage?
Recommit by making a new agreement. What can you promise now? Can you promise to repair the damage, pay the costs, complete the agreement at a new deadline? If not, what can you promise?
Recommit

46. Closure Conversations – When?
At the end of the project
At the end of the week
When a promise is kept
When a promise is not kept
On the deadline date, finished or not
When bad news arrives
When good news arrives
When things get interrupted. Etc, etc, etc.

47. Closure Conversations Create…
Accomplishment
Recognition of facts, people, and circumstances
The opportunity for a fresh start
Create completion. Debrief the promise, the project, the performance.
What worked? What didn’t work?
Close the loop on past goals, requests, and promises. Take things off the list.
This avoids the conversations about “Whatever happened to that idea, those people, ______?”
Create accomplishment.
We finished X. We did it!
Create recognition.
Thank you for the work you did on _______”
Create velocity.
Move on to the next thing.
Use the energy of accomplishment to envision a new future.
Re-start the cycle of productive conversations.

48. Self-Assessment Worksheet
1 - What facts can you Acknowledge to complete old business in your workplace? What can you say to Appreciate people who have performed well at work? What mistakes & misunderstandings could you Apologize for? What broken agreements from the past could you Amend, to update them for today?
EXERCISE: GETTING WHAT YOU WANT (fill out the form, then paired-share)
Identify one or two people and something you would like from each of them.
What do you want? Who can do that for you, or deliver it to you?
Write out the requests you would make to have them give you what you want.

49. Using the Four Conversations
Everyday communication that gets results:
Initiative - Launch
Understanding - Engage
Performance – Ask + Promise = Agreements
Closure – Complete the accomplishment

50. Thank You / Closure
This program is complete. You are terrific! We’re sorry we couldn’t serve champagne and caviar on the breaks. We’ll be available if you want to talk more about The Four Conversations!
Free newsletter:
Blog: