1. Communication Mrs. Wagner Lifeskills

2. Communication Terms Communication – Sending & Receiving of messages between people – the message is understood Verbal Communication – Communication where WORDS are used – written or spoken Nonverbal Communication – Sending messages without words

3. “I” Messages – You say, how You feel & what You think – rather than criticizing someone else Body Language – Person’s posture, facial expression, gestures & way of moving Eye Contact – Direct visual contact with another person’s eyes Feedback – occurs when a listener lets a speaker know that he or she is trying to understand the message Mixed Messages – body language & words do not communicate the same message

4. Levels of Communication Level 1 – Cliché Conversation - lowest level - no sharing of self - no messages being sent Level 2 – Reporting the Facts about others - gossiping - feelings not shared

5. Level 3 – Telling your Ideas - expressing personal thoughts, judgments & decisions - trust not established yet Level 4 – Sharing of Feelings & Emotions - Get to know other person - Feeling of being heard or understood Level 5 – Peak Communication - complete honesty, trust & openness - memorable experience - may or may not be permanent

6. Complete – “Communicating With Others” Activity 2

7. Patterns of Communication 1. Placating – Communication so the other person doesn’t get mad – “Yes Man” 2. Blaming – Used by persons who are known as fault finders, bosses & dictators – puts everyone and everything down 3. Computing – Tries to avoid showing feelings and emotions – Cool, calm & collected – are not able to share intimate relationships

8. 4. Distracting – distracts or continuously changes the subject- Acts as if surroundings are meaningless 5. Leveling – provides the total response to others - Does & says what they really feel - Is NOT telling it like it is or hurting others - Establishes truth and understanding

9. Complete “Communicating With Others” Activity 3

10. Assertive Communication - Express your feelings directly, ask for what you want & refuse what you don’t want. Is positive Aggressive Communication - Foreceful, hostile & destructive, involves putting others down & is negative Passive Communication - Simply observing and not becoming emotionally involved. Literally doing nothing at all – can be positive or neg.

11. Complete Passive, Aggressive or Assertive Wkst.

12. Destructive Communication Blaming Interrupting Endless Fighting Character Assassination Calling in Reinforcements Withdrawal Need to be Right You Messages

13. Constructive Communication “I” Messages Clarity Timing Asking Questions Reflective Listening Respect & Consideration Avoiding Intense Anger

14. “I” Messages State the feelings & thoughts you are having at the time of communication “I feel ______ when____ because____” “I would like _____” Don’t blame other person

15. Complete “I” Messages Wkst.