…Tools to Survive and Thrive …Tools to Survive and Thrive Mt. Vernon Christian Church Sept.-Nov., 2015 Embracing Conflict.

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Presentation transcript:

…Tools to Survive and Thrive …Tools to Survive and Thrive Mt. Vernon Christian Church Sept.-Nov., 2015 Embracing Conflict

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive Here’s the key motivation and strategy for this series:

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive Here’s the key motivation and strategy for this series: Begin with a Biblical principle

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive Here’s the key motivation and strategy for this series: Begin with a Biblical principle Express this principle in a practical tool

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive Here’s the key motivation and strategy for this series: Begin with a Biblical principle Express this principle in a practical tool That equips us to respond to conflict

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive Here’s the key motivation and strategy for this series: Begin with a Biblical principle Express this principle in a practical tool That equips us to respond to conflict In a healthy, wise, God-honoring way

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive Here’s the key motivation and strategy for this series: Begin with a Biblical principle Express this principle in a practical tool That equips us to respond to conflict In a healthy, wise, God-honoring way Empowering us and others to survive and thrive

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive Here’s the key motivation and strategy for this series: Begin with a Biblical principle Express this principle in a practical tool That equips us to respond to conflict In a healthy, wise, God-honoring way Empowering us and others to survive and thrive So as to partner with God to fulfill his purposes.

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive Here’s the key motivation and strategy for this series: Begin with a Biblical principle Express this principle in a practical tool That equips us to respond to conflict In a healthy, wise, God-honoring way Empowering us and others to survive and thrive So as to partner with God to fulfill his purposes.

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive 14 For he himself [Christ Jesus] is our peace, who has made the two one and has destroyed the barrier, the dividing wall of hostility, 15 by abolishing in his flesh the law with its commandments and regulations. His purpose was to create in himself one new man out of the two, thus making peace, 16 and in this one body to reconcile both of them to God through the cross, by which he put to death their hostility. 17 He came and preached peace to you who were far away and peace to those who were near. 18 For through him we both have access to the Father by one Spirit. Ephesians 2:14-18 ( NIV 1984 ) HAVE YOU MET CONFLICT LATELY?

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive HAVE YOU MET CONFLICT LATELY? Conflict impacts us all. Conflict can grab us, whether we want it to or not. Conflict often brings all kinds of emotions with it. Each person responds differently to conflict. Conflict often leads to questions. It may also lead to new relationships (and loss of old ones). Sometimes we just hope to survive. In conflict we often engage with God anew. God redeems conflict; he uses it for a purpose.

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive Here’s the key motivation and strategy for this series: Begin with a Biblical principle 4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. (Phil. 2:4) CHOOSE YOUR RESPONSE WISELY

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive CHOOSE YOUR RESPONSE WISELY Here’s the key motivation and strategy for this series: Begin with a Biblical principle 4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. (Phil. 2:4) Express this principle in a practical tool

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive CHOOSE YOUR RESPONSE WISELY Low High Polarities Avoid

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive CHOOSE YOUR RESPONSE WISELY Low High Avoiding Competing Accommodating Collaborating Compromising How much energy do I give to meeting YOUR INTERESTS? How much energy do I give to meeting MY INTERESTS? YOUR INTERESTS MY INTERESTS

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive CHOOSE YOUR RESPONSE WISELY Practical Tool: Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive CHOOSE YOUR RESPONSE WISELY 3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. 4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. 5 Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: … Philippians 2:3-5 ( NIV 1984 )

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE 3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. 4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. 5 Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: … Philippians 2:3-5 ( NIV 1984 )

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE 5 Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: 6 Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped; 7 but made himself nothing [emptied himself], taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. 8 And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death— even death on a cross! 9 Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, 10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11 and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father. Phil. 2:5-11 ( NIV1984 )

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE The Example and Attitude of Jesus Christ EQUALITY He was God the Son through all of eternity…always was. EMPTYING He gave up heavenly home, came to earth; served and died. EXALTATION He was raised from the dead; honored above all others, to the glory of God the Father

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE The Attitude of Jesus Christ and the Fulfilling of His Rights EQUALITY He had every right that belongs to God. EMPTYING He released every right he had, entrusting them to his Father. EXALTATION His rights were met, in God’s way and time, in a far greater way than could have happened otherwise.

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE Let’s Begin with Indicator Lights

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE Let’s Begin with Indicator Lights These indicator lights in your life might be… Anger Jealousy Fear Anxiety “Hurt” These indicator lights are there for a reason!

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE Let’s Begin with Indicator Lights These indicator lights are there for a reason!

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE Let’s Begin with Indicator Lights These indicator lights are there for a reason!

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE Let’s Begin with Indicator Lights These indicator lights are there for a reason!

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE Step 1 of this 7-Step Prayer With hands by heart (or “gut”): “God, what right am I being tempted to demand?”

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE Step 2 of this 7-Step Prayer Holding hands in front and looking at them: “Is this more important or is God?” “God, you are.”

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE Step 3 of this 7-Step Prayer Lifting hands to God: “God, I entrust this right (these rights) to you. I release it (them) to you.”

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE Step 4 of this 7-Step Prayer With hands now lifted and apart, release and worship: “God, I worship you. You are faithful. You are trustworthy.” Remain…Rest

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE Step 5 of this 7-Step Prayer Bringing hands together, receiving from God: “God, do you have any responsibilities you want me to accept – any act of obedience, even if it costs?”

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE Step 6 of this 7-Step Prayer Bringing hands down, as holding something: “This is what I sense God is asking of me. Will I accept this responsibility?” “Yes, Lord, I accept.”

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE Step 7 of this 7-Step Prayer Bringing hand back to heart, as one receiving: “God, thank you for peace. I will trust and obey. Grant me your grace and love.”

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE Step 7 of this 7-Step Prayer Bringing hand back to heart, as one receiving: “God, thank you for peace. I will trust and obey. Grant me your grace and love.”

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE (Counted cross-stitch) TRUST and OBEY

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE TRUST and OBEY (Counted cross-stitch) Do you see yourself?

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE Step 7 of this 7-Step Prayer Bringing hand back to heart, as one receiving: “God, thank you for peace. I will trust and obey. Grant me your grace and love.”

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE 3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. 4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. 5 Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: … Philippians 2:3-5 ( NIV 1984 )

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE Identify Decide Release Worship & Rest Receive Commit Walk (with a new attitude)

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE Identify Decide Release Worship & Rest Receive Commit Walk (with a new attitude) Practicing in daily calm prepares for sudden crisis.

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE 3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. 4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. 5 Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: … Philippians 2:3-5 ( NIV 1984 )

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE 5 Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: 6 Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped; 7 but made himself nothing [emptied himself], taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. 8 And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death— even death on a cross! 9 Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, 10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11 and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father. Phil. 2:5-11 ( NIV1984 )

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE The Example and Attitude of Jesus Christ EQUALITY He was God the Son through all of eternity…always was. EMPTYING He gave up heavenly home, came to earth; served and died. EXALTATION He was raised from the dead; honored above all others. to the glory of God the Father

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE The Attitude of Jesus Christ and the Fulfilling of His Rights EQUALITY He had every right that belongs to God. EMPTYING He released every right he had, entrusting them to his Father. EXALTATION His rights were met, in God’s way and time, in a far greater way than could have happened otherwise.

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE 3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. 4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. 5 Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: … Philippians 2:3-5 ( NIV 1984 )

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE 5 Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: 6 Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped; 7 but made himself nothing [emptied himself], taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. 8 And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death— even death on a cross! 9 Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, 10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11 and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father. Phil. 2:5-11 ( NIV1984 )

Embracing Conflict …Tools to Survive and Thrive A 7-STEP PRAYER FOR AN ATTITUDE 5 Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: 6 Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped; 7 but made himself nothing [emptied himself], taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness. 8 And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death— even death on a cross! 9 Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, 10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11 and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father. Phil. 2:5-11 ( NIV1984 )