Preparing for Children Chapter 5

The Goal of Parenting Primary goal-to help children grow and become mature, independent individuals who can make their own decisions and accept responsibility for their actions. Primary goal-to help children grow and become mature, independent individuals who can make their own decisions and accept responsibility for their actions.

1. Helping children grow up responsibly Teaching personal priorities and standards Teaching personal priorities and standards how to evaluate the importance of something how to evaluate the importance of something living a lifestyle that reflects their beliefs living a lifestyle that reflects their beliefs Letting children learn through new experiences Letting children learn through new experiences allow the child to ‘do it myself’ even if not done perfect allow the child to ‘do it myself’ even if not done perfect allow the child to learn how to do it allow the child to learn how to do it

Recognizing the importance of other people in children’s lives Recognizing the importance of other people in children’s lives helps children grow up responsibly helps children grow up responsibly as children grow, they want and need to meet many different people as children grow, they want and need to meet many different people is a positive mark of growth, not jealous about loss of child’s attention is a positive mark of growth, not jealous about loss of child’s attention

The Challenges of Parenting- Involves commitments of love, time, energy, patience, and money. Involves commitments of love, time, energy, patience, and money.

1. Parenting is an expression of love a. having a child is a way of fulfilling the deep love a couple has for one another a. having a child is a way of fulfilling the deep love a couple has for one another i. creating an atmosphere of love and acceptance is important to child’s emotional development i. creating an atmosphere of love and acceptance is important to child’s emotional development ii. showing love and affection to one another and to child lays the foundation for self- esteem and trust ii. showing love and affection to one another and to child lays the foundation for self- esteem and trust

Parenting involves commitments of time and energy babies have to be fed, bathed, and clothed babies have to be fed, bathed, and clothed cries have to be answered, even in the middle of the night cries have to be answered, even in the middle of the night

Parenting requires patience children ask a lot of questions children ask a lot of questions normal type of behavior normal type of behavior

Parenting involves a major financial commitment costs for clothing, furniture, and toys costs for clothing, furniture, and toys housing, food, transportation, medical care, and recreation become major expenses housing, food, transportation, medical care, and recreation become major expenses education costs can be great education costs can be great consideration of the loss of one spouse’s income when one parent gives up a job to stay home and care for the child consideration of the loss of one spouse’s income when one parent gives up a job to stay home and care for the child child care may then be an expense child care may then be an expense

Teen Parenting Many teens are not prepared to face the physical, emotional, social, and financial challenges of parenthood. Many teens are not prepared to face the physical, emotional, social, and financial challenges of parenthood.

1. Physical risks A. a lack of medical care or poor nutrition during A. a lack of medical care or poor nutrition during B. pregnancy puts mother and child at risk B. pregnancy puts mother and child at risk C. illnesses and complications more common C. illnesses and complications more common D. own bodies may still be developing D. own bodies may still be developing E. they have higher risks of having premature, low-birth weight babies E. they have higher risks of having premature, low-birth weight babies F. infant death rate is also higher F. infant death rate is also higher G. mother’s age makes a difference in pregnancy; best childbearing years for women are from ages G. mother’s age makes a difference in pregnancy; best childbearing years for women are from ages 20-32

2. Emotional Challenges A. Teenage marriages that occur out of pregnancy have a fairly high divorce rate. (teens are still growing themselves) B. Teen parents must cope with sudden changes in their role from adolescents to parents. C. Parent-child roles are often conflicting…you have to be a parent to a child while you are still a child to your parents.

3. Social Changes A. A baby greatly hinders teen parents’ social life. B. Working and child-care responsibilities mean they are less likely to experience a normal social life with friends their age.

4. Financial Challenges Many lack stable financial resources (secure job). Many lack stable financial resources (secure job). Many drop out of school and have low paying jobs. Many drop out of school and have low paying jobs. If don’t marry, father is separated from his child and may not offer financial help. If don’t marry, father is separated from his child and may not offer financial help. Many resort to federal aid programs for financial support. Many resort to federal aid programs for financial support. Many states have laws requiring fathers to support their children. Many states have laws requiring fathers to support their children.

5. Education and Career A. Since some teens drop out of school in order to work and then find it difficult to obtain good-paying jobs. B. Not only do teens suffer from economic consequences, but their children suffer also.

6. The Children of Teen Parents Children born to teens are subject to more risks than those born to older parents. Children born to teens are subject to more risks than those born to older parents.

Physical risks- Certain prenatal care behaviors could put baby at risk Certain prenatal care behaviors could put baby at risk non-prescription medications-may harm fetus non-prescription medications-may harm fetus poor diet-underdeveloped or low-weight baby poor diet-underdeveloped or low-weight baby smoking-premature birth smoking-premature birth excessive alcohol-fetal alcohol syndrome (includes physical and mental disabilities) excessive alcohol-fetal alcohol syndrome (includes physical and mental disabilities)

Intellectual risks- First two years of life are critical because the child is building the mental foundation that will dictate behavior through adulthood First two years of life are critical because the child is building the mental foundation that will dictate behavior through adulthood Young people may lack the time to adequately nurture the development of their child Young people may lack the time to adequately nurture the development of their child

Emotional risks research has shown that emotional development is the foundation of intelligence research has shown that emotional development is the foundation of intelligence even newborns have emotional needs- rocking, touching, soothing, talking, and singing even newborns have emotional needs- rocking, touching, soothing, talking, and singing

Social risks children of teen parents often become teen parents themselves children of teen parents often become teen parents themselves

Financial risks with lack of education and job skills, children have a greater chance of living in poverty. with lack of education and job skills, children have a greater chance of living in poverty.

Deciding whether to have children:

Reasons for having children… it is an expression of love it is an expression of love sharing the joys and responsibilities of rearing a child brings many couples closer together sharing the joys and responsibilities of rearing a child brings many couples closer together desire to have a family lifestyle desire to have a family lifestyle want to enrich their lives and share their experiences with children want to enrich their lives and share their experiences with children don’t want to miss the special experiences of life that children make possible don’t want to miss the special experiences of life that children make possible fulfilling role expectations fulfilling role expectations come from stable home and want to become parents too come from stable home and want to become parents too

Reasons for NOT having children personal freedom personal freedom career concerns career concerns medical problems medical problems financial concerns financial concerns fear fear prefer freedom of a childless lifestyle prefer freedom of a childless lifestyle demands of a career demands of a career may have physical traits or hereditary diseases they do not wish a child to inherit may have physical traits or hereditary diseases they do not wish a child to inherit expense of rearing a child expense of rearing a child unhappy childhood unhappy childhood fear of rearing a child The end. fear of rearing a child The end.