Cyberbullying The Digital World’s Ugly Reality Understanding the psychology behind it, the forms of it, and it’s prevention – a parent’s guide

The Psychology of Bullying Throughout the past, bullying has always existed. Dominant personalities or physically stronger individuals have preyed on weaker individuals. This does not make it right or correct! It is genderless – girls use it, as well as boys, just in a less physical and more psychological way. It is used regardless of race, religion, or political beliefs.

The Psychology of Bullying The reasons for bullying are many: anger, hate, feelings of self-righteousness, as well as sub-conscious feelings of inadequacy (bringing someone else down to make yourself feel better/stronger). Many bullies are victims of abuse themselves, and are lashing out in response to it. However, this does not excuse it.

Cyberbullying Cyberbullying can cross gender lines and the aggressor is no longer the “bigger kid.” Because of the possibility of anonymity, the identity of the aggressor is not always known. This can cause additional issues for the victim, unlike traditional bullying. Cyberbullying should be taken seriously… teenagers have already taken their own lives because of it.

Types of Cyberbullying Nancy Willard, author of "An Educators Guide to Cyberbullying and Cyberthreats" breaks down cyberbullying into the following categories: Flaming. Online fights using electronic messages with angry or vulgar language. Harassment. Repeatedly sending nasty, mean, an insulting messages. Denigration. "Dissing" someone online. Sending or posting gossip or rumors about a person to damage his or her reputation or friendships. Impersonation. Pretending to be someone else and sending or posting material to get that person in trouble or damage their reputation.

Types of Cyberbullying (cont.) Outing. Sharing someone's secrets or embarrassing information or images online. Trickery. Tricking someone into revealing secrets or embarrassing information and then sharing it online. Exclusion. Intentionally and cruelly excluding someone. Cyberstalking. Repeated, intense harassment and denigration that includes threats or creates significant fear.

Consequences of Cyberbullying Victims of cyberbullying often show the following symptoms: Depression and suicidal thoughts/actions Avoidance of social situations or school, withdrawn Low self-esteem Sadness Anger

Helping Cyberbullying Victims Frequently, victims do not tell someone about the problem until it is too late. If your child is exhibiting symptoms of depression or other signs of possible signs of cyberbullying, encourage them to talk with you, a teacher, or a counselor. Let them know that you support them and are there to help them. Victims usually feel isolated and abandoned.

Preventing Cyberbullying As suggested by Rosalind Wiseman, educator and author of the best seller "Queen Bees & Wannabes“: Move your child’s computer to an area in your home where an adult can monitor its use. Set up consequences and limits of computer use for your child to prevent them from bullying others. Monitor them on websites that they frequently visit. Explain to your child the problems associated with sharing passwords.

Preventing Cyberbullying (cont.) Install software on your child’s computer that monitors and filters what they access. Do not delete any evidence of cyberbullying. Always print it out and save it to show to either school or police authorities. Other prevention options: Discuss bullying and cyberbullying with your child. Visit sites on bullying with them, so they are aware of it and conscientious of it. Discuss with them what they should do if they are aware of it happening to other people.

Cyberbullying Support and Resources There are many websites and support groups available to victims and their families. Here are some of the current groups/sites on the Web: