ATTRACTION AND CLOSE RELATIONSHIPS Chapter 9

Desire to establish and maintain social contact with other Need for Affiliation

Factors that Influence Affiliation Needs  Evolution  Biology  Culture  Gender

Loneliness  A feeling of deprivation about existing social relations  Shyness

Situational Factors that Trigger Affiliation Needs  The Proximity Effect  Familiarity  The mere exposure effect  Anxiety  Schachter’s anxiety research

Physical Attractiveness  Bias for beauty is pervasive  What-is-beautiful-is-good stereotype: Tendency to associate physical attractiveness with other desirable qualities.

Physical Attractiveness Beauty is an objective quality.

Physical Attractiveness Beauty is a subjective quality.

Situational factors influencing perceptions of beauty

First Encounters  Liking other who are similar  Demographics  Attitudes Bryne’s Two Step Model of Attraction

First Encounters  Liking others who are similar  Physical attractiveness The matching hypothesis The complementarity hypothesis  Reciprocity

Mate Selection Evolutionary PerspectiveSociocultural Perspective

Figure 9.6: Evolutionary Mate Preferences: Theory and Practice

Intimate Relationships  Social exchange theory

Intimate Relationships  Equity Theory Your Benefits = Your Partner’s Benefits Your Contributions Your Partner’s Contributions

Types of Relationships  Exchange vs Communal  Attachment styles  Anxious  Avoidant  Secure

Sternberg’s Triangular Theory of Love

Passionate Love  Romantic love characterized by high arousal, intense attraction and fear of rejection.  Excitation transfer: the process whereby arousal caused by one stimulus is added to the arousal from a second stimulus and the combined arousal is attributed to the second stimulus.

Companionate Love  A secure, trusting, stable partnership.  Is the diminution of passion genetically pre- determined?  Self-disclosure: sharing intimate facts and feeling.

From a Sliver to a Wedge Theory of Social Penetration

Relationship Issues  The Marriage Trajectory

Lucas, Clark & Diener (2003): 15 year study of over 24,000 individuals living in Germany Are married people happier than unmarried people?

The Gottman Relationship Institute: John Gottman