Building Success and Resiliency: Preventing Tragedies Scott Poland, N.S.U. Steve Rosenberg, P.S.I.

Statistics …. The leading causes of death for children are accidents, homicide and suicide Adults have a responsibility to work on prevention at school and in homes and neighborhoods Children in the U.S. are dying in nearly record numbers

Recommendations for Parents Bring back the family meal Don’t let technology steal your child Avoid setting their room up to be a kingdom Limit teen driving—safe driving tips Know where your child is and know their friends and the parents--Network

More Recommendations Avoid putting children in the middle of divorce Importance of modeling—Gandhi quote Enjoy your children and let them know they are the sons and daughters you always wanted Make family the priority Don’t micromanage about school issues

Reduce Bullying Repetitive Humiliating Physical and/or verbal Involves power New term bullicide Cyber bullying issues

Reduce Bullying…. Turn the “silent majority” into a “caring majority”.

“ We must end the conspiracy of silence that allows guns and weapons in our schools!”

The object is to cut off blood flow to carotid artery causing nearly or completely passing out, then releasing the pressure allowing the rush of blood back into the brain causing a lightheaded feeling resembling a quick high. Choking Game

Frequent headaches. Bruises or abrasions on neck. Blood shot eyes or flushed face Agitated or aggressive moods Presence of strap, rope or belt without reason Warning Signs

Important Points Choking game often done in pairs and can be contagious Most kids learn it from peers at school Need for increased supervision at school and in homes Question of are deaths suicides or accidents

Choking Game Estimate is that several hundred adolescents die each year Hanging deaths are on increase Many adolescents who do not use drugs see the choking game as acceptable Adolescents often seek thrills and communities need to provide recreational/adventure programs

Good relationships with other youth Seeks adult help when needed Lack of access to suicidal means Access to mental health care Religiosity School environment that encourages help seeking and promotes health PROTECTIVE FACTORS

Family cohesion and stability Coping and problem solving skills Positive self worth and impulse control Positive connections to school and extracurricular participation Successful academically PROTECTIVE FACTORS

Self Mutilation/Self Injury Episodic and complex behavior 4 to 19% of teens engage in SI Contagious Not as simple as tell them to stop Cutters report it calms them and stops them from suicide Adults need information/awareness Schools need local guidelines

New Breed (Walsh 2006) Normal attitude towards body image without hatred/alienation Onset ages 11 or 12 use single method 2 to 1 female wide range backgrounds No history of psychiatric treatment More receptive to treatment

What Do Kids Report? Want to feel concrete pain when psychological pain is overwhelming Reduces numbness Keeps trauma from intruding I cut so I will not kill myself Gets attention of others Discharges tension, anger and despair Gain a sense of control Punish myself Cutting is better than going out and getting drunk

Excerpts from Cutter’s Poem “Turn up the music and set the mood Once is never enough Quivering with anticipation Watch it the drop spills over and runs down my arm Crimson orgasm---you seduce me every time Mr. Knife” Sight of blood flow is central to experience

Helping Students Cope Recognize developmental level of students. Respond with patience and love. Answer questions but don’t overwhelm with too much information.

Helping Students Cope…, cont.. Adults need to model calmness and reassure children of their safety. Provide activities and projects that allow them to express feelings. Recognize the value of diversity. Model tolerance and avoid stereotyping. Re-establish routines quickly. More resources:

Geographical Proximity Outside the disaster area Within hearing distance Within hearing distance Near the disaster area Direct exposure Direct exposure

Psychosocial Proximity Identification with or similarity to victims Acquaintance Immediate family Near family or close friend

Population at Risk Oversensitive Oversensitive Difficult personal or social crisis Difficult personal or social crisis Significant loss in the past year Recent or similar trauma Recent or similar trauma

Circles of Vulnerability Geographical Proximity Population at Risk Psychosocial Proximity

Resiliency Learned behavior Importance of being surrounded by caring family and friends Utilize coping skills and vent strong emotions Keep an optimistic view

Recognize that all children need: three or more significant adults in their lives in addition to parents. a sense of safety and belonging in the home, school, and community. three or more hours of organized activities weekly. Adolescents need volunteer work

National adolescent survey found students disconnected from school more likely to engage in: Substance abuse Sexual activity violence

School Disconnection Results From: Large schools Lack of extracurricular participation Lack of belonging Low academic achievement Discipline problems

Building Relationships Key is knowing students well What are students hopes and dreams? Maslow’s hierarchy of needs

“We must reach out to the unreachable!” Craig Scott Columbine Survivor