Timber Monteith and Katelyn Regan Positive Psychology

Aims for the day That you will leave with new ideas for improving your own happiness. That you will leave with new ideas about how to help your children live meaningful, fulfilling, and happy lives.

Origins of Positive Psychology Founder – Martin Seligman The following information comes from Seligman’s TED talk in 2004

What is Positive Psychology The study of healthy states such as happiness, strength of character and optimism

What Positive Psychology is NOT! Does not follow the historical “Disease” model where doctors asked “What’s wrong with you?” and try to make the miserable less miserable. 3 problems with this model: Doctors were victimologists & pathologists Forgot about improving normal lives and capitalizing on high talent No interventions to make people happier

3 Aims of Positive Psychology 1). As much concern with strengths as with weaknesses 2). As interested in building the best things in life as in repairing the worst. 3). As concerned with making the normal lives of people fulfilling and with nurturing high talent as with healing pathology.

Food for thought… Question Dr. Seligman studied the difference between extremely happy people and extremely miserable people. What do you think is the biggest difference?

Answer… Extremely happy people are very social.

Three Happy Lives According to Seligman, there are three kinds of happy lives: 1). The Pleasant Life 2). The Good Life 3). The Meaningful Life

The Pleasant Life – Experience as much positive emotion as possible – Raw feeling – Mindfulness (being in the moment) But... – Heritable – Habituates (becomes less over time as it becomes habit) – Not very modifiable or maleable

The Good Life Flow versus pleasure; When you are in the flow, you don’t feel anything You know your highest strengths and recraft your life to use them – Love – Work – Play

The Meaningful Life Knowing your highest strengths and using them to belong to and provide service for something larger than you are

So What? The pursuit of your pleasure life has almost no impact on your overall happiness In order to to live a full and happy life – Attending to your “Good Life” and “Meaningful Life” will have a positive impact on your “Pleasure Life”

Positive Intervention #1 Design a beautiful day Plan it Savor it Be mindful (be present) – If you live in the past, you run the risk of becoming depressed. If you live in the future, you run the risk of becoming anxious.

Positive Intervention #2 Gratitude Visit – Remember someone who did something enormously important for you – Write a 300 word testimonial – Visit this person and read the testimonial

Positive Intervention #3 Strength Date – Find out your partner’s or children’s strength, and design a date around it.

Seligman argues these 3 interventions have lasting impacts!!! Lasting Impacts

Dr. Seligman and colleagues recognized these as definitions of “positive individual traits” that are directly related to authentic happiness. VIA Character Strengths

What do you think are the 24 Character Strengths?

Creativity Curiosity Judgment & Open- Mindedness Love of Learning Perspective Bravery Perseverance Honesty Zest/Energy Capacity to Love and Be Loved Kindness Social Intelligence Teamwork Fairness Leadership Forgiveness & Mercy Modesty & Humility Prudence Self-Regulation Appreciation of Beauty and Excellence Gratitude Hope Humor Religiousness & Spirituality 24 Character Strengths

Sort your cards into 3 sections – Almost Always – Sometimes – Rarely or Never Using the strengths in your “Almost Always” pile, put them in order. Record top 3 strengths on an index card. Sort your Strength Cards

Find one or two other people in the room that share one of your top three strengths. Share a time when you had to draw on this strength.

Find someone who has a character strength that you do NOT have in your top 3. Share a time when you drew on that strength.

Look at your pile of “Rarely or Never Used” strengths Share about a time that you had to use this strength.

VIA Strengths Take the survey: &__utmb= &__utmc= &__utmx=- &__utmz= utmcsr=google|utmccn=%28org anic%29|utmcmd=organic|utmctr=what%20is%20via%20strengths&__ utmv=-&__utmk= There is both an adult and Children's version.

Sometimes your character strengths can be the reason why you get upset about something. Character Strengths as Red Hot Buttons

Have your child do the same activity and talk about his/her strengths. Choose the top five strengths for your child and see what are the similarities and differences. Have your child choose your top five strengths. At the end of each week, have everyone in the family choose a strength that someone else in the family exhibited. Use these strengths as conversation points when you child is struggling. How can you use these at Home?

Similar conversations with students at school when meeting in small groups or one-on-one. Part of our “Response to Intervention” model. – Often times our interventions are based on a student’s strengths. How do we use these at School?

Understanding and developing your strengths is part of thriving in life and being happy. Living Your Best Life

6 Thrive Centers They are the physical, social and psychological areas of our lives that have the greatest influence on our well-being

Community “More than income, education level, or religion, the place where you live determines your level of happiness” Find Community Space – a place were you can interact comfortably with others Be comfortable with things in walking distance – get to know your neighborhood Find a sense of safety – you want the outdoors to draw you out not keep you inside

Work Place The Right Job – find a job that challenges you at the right level Avoid Long Commutes - “People who commute an hour to work each way would need a 40% increase in their monthly wage to be as satisfied with their life as people who walk to the office.” Don’t skip vacations!

Social Life Determine positive friends – make sure you are spending time with your positive friends (even though it seems like your more negative friends need you) Create a group of mutually committed friends – ones that will stick with you through time and distance (*hint: look to your past) Marry the Right Person – And keep your marriage alive with positive energy

Financial Life Lets be real– money buys a lot Focus on long-term investments verses instant gratification – teach your children to work for money and save Avoid debt

Your Home Hang up the pictures Grow a Garden - “Several studies show that gardening lowers stress hormones. Hoeing, planting, weeding, fertilizing and harvesting all include regular, low-intensity, range-of-motion- exercise.” Allow space to engage in your hobbies Optimize Your Bedroom for Sleep – get rid of the other stuff

Self Recognize and acknowledge your gifts and talents Personal Mission Statement - what drives you and what are your goals Develop people skills – how to be a friend and how to handle tricky situations Volunteer

What are you going to do in the next week to ensure you are thriving in each of these 6 areas? How are you going to use the strength cards? Conclusion

Something to take away “Attitude, not aptitude, determines your altitude”

Please write down any future Counselor Coffee topics you would like to learn about. Thank you!

Welcome Maraika!