Mindful Parenting: Cultivating greater awareness of self, children, and your relationship with them UW Early Learning Conference June 5, 2010 Rebecca C. Cortes Yaffa Maritz

Workshop Goals Background on mindfulness Awareness of self Awareness of children Awareness of relationships with children Background on mindfulness Awareness of self Awareness of children Awareness of relationships with children

For more information please contact Dr. Patricia Jennings, or

Intention

Intention Intention as different from goals State your intention to the person sitting next to you Examples:  Listen  Be open to new ideas  Participate  Be non-judgmental  Be present Intention as different from goals State your intention to the person sitting next to you Examples:  Listen  Be open to new ideas  Participate  Be non-judgmental  Be present

Breathing MindBodyBreathing

Mindfulness is... Paying attention in a particular way : With intention, on purpose With open-hearted, non-judgmental awareness In the present moment Paying attention in a particular way : With intention, on purpose With open-hearted, non-judgmental awareness In the present moment “Everyday Blessings” by Myla and Jon Kabat-Zinn, 1997

Brief Background on Mindfulness Buddhism Judaism Islam Christianity Indigenous cultures Education: Teachers, students, incorporated in social emotional learning curricula, such as PATHS® and MindUP™ Medicine: psoriasis, high blood pressure, chronic pain, Psychology: anxiety, depression, substance abuse Buddhism Judaism Islam Christianity Indigenous cultures Education: Teachers, students, incorporated in social emotional learning curricula, such as PATHS® and MindUP™ Medicine: psoriasis, high blood pressure, chronic pain, Psychology: anxiety, depression, substance abuse

The Mind-Body Connection MindBody Health, Calmness, Compassion

Mindfulness is... Not a relaxation technique, although one can feel relaxed when being mindful Not an activity that takes up extra time during the day, rather it is a way of sensing time differently (chronos vs. kairos time) Either a set of skills, or a “quality of consciousness” or a way of being that begins with the self Not a relaxation technique, although one can feel relaxed when being mindful Not an activity that takes up extra time during the day, rather it is a way of sensing time differently (chronos vs. kairos time) Either a set of skills, or a “quality of consciousness” or a way of being that begins with the self

Mindful Parenting Dimensions Listening with full attention Nonjudgmental acceptance of self and child Emotional awareness of self and child Self-regulation in the parenting relationship Compassion for self and child Duncan, Coatsworth, & Greenberg (2009) Listening with full attention Nonjudgmental acceptance of self and child Emotional awareness of self and child Self-regulation in the parenting relationship Compassion for self and child Duncan, Coatsworth, & Greenberg (2009)

The Parenting Tree Inner Resources Presence (self) Relationships

Mindful Listening Activity

Listening Mothers™ and Reflective Parenting: Discipline from the Heart Our mission is to empower parents of children under 5 years old to become more effective parents. The research based curriculums promote strong family bonds and sets the foundation for long lasting emotional health.

Listening Mothers™ and Reflective Parenting: Discipline from the Heart Mindful parenting is a way of approaching all experiences with an open mind and open heart (COAL). Through mindfulness, parents: Develop self awareness Become attuned with their children Learn more effective ways to communicate Create greater capacity to help children regulate their emotions to nurture resiliency and well-being in their children Mindful parenting is a way of approaching all experiences with an open mind and open heart (COAL). Through mindfulness, parents: Develop self awareness Become attuned with their children Learn more effective ways to communicate Create greater capacity to help children regulate their emotions to nurture resiliency and well-being in their children

Listening Mothers™ and Reflective Parenting: Discipline from the Heart Presence – The ability to observe your internal self (form healthy relationship with oneself) Attunement –Focused attention on the internal world of the other Resonance – Feeling felt Presence – The ability to observe your internal self (form healthy relationship with oneself) Attunement –Focused attention on the internal world of the other Resonance – Feeling felt

“Mindsight” “... the ability for the human mind to see itself. It is a powerful lens through which we can understand our inner lives with more clarity, transform the brain and enhance our relationships with others.” Dr. Dan Siegel Executive Director Mindsight Institute “... the ability for the human mind to see itself. It is a powerful lens through which we can understand our inner lives with more clarity, transform the brain and enhance our relationships with others.” Dr. Dan Siegel Executive Director Mindsight Institute

A mindful story...

Ways to Be Mindful in Our Daily Life Short mindfulness practice first thing in the morning Use breathing on your way to work, shopping, dropping off children at daycare or school Set intention for the day in the car or walking into work setting or at home Use breathing to address tension Bring mindfulness to everyday tasks Short mindfulness practice first thing in the morning Use breathing on your way to work, shopping, dropping off children at daycare or school Set intention for the day in the car or walking into work setting or at home Use breathing to address tension Bring mindfulness to everyday tasks

Mindfulness Resources