Carl Rogers Self-Theory People shape themselves through freedom of choice and action

Who is in charge? “ Man is the architect of himself.” We choose We are each unique, and have a distinct world view We each have different potential Valencia, Spain

What is the Self? The centre of experience Your ongoing sense of who you are  How and why you react to the environment  How you choose to act upon the environment  Your values The self is innate, or inborn and his what makes us human

We need self-regard, or self- esteem It develops as we grow and become aware of our self “Me” and “Not me” At first it is formed by how we see that others see us Then we start to value ourselves

Congruence Congruence means a fit between two things – in this case, a fit between how we see ourselves and our experience When something in our experience challenges our idea of our self, we can feel threatened and anxious Read 499

Inflexible, incongruent, or inconsistency Some people cannot accept success if they have a negative self-concept Some people cannot accept failure (which goes against their idea of themselves) by denying it or blaming it on other people

Parents and other adults play a key role – a need for positive regard Children learn self-esteem when their parents show them unconditional positive regard  Accepting the value of children regardless of their behaviour at the moment  Ongoing, consistent expression of caring, love and respect

Conditional Positive Regard When parents show conditional positive regard, children start to disown their selves  I will love you if you get good grades  I will love you if you…..  You were naughty – you are no longer my child The granting or taking away of approval and love based on a child’s behaviour

What happens? Children develop conditions of worth – I am only worthwhile when I am being perfect, or behaving in a certain way  Only if I get good grades  Only if I don’t fight with my parent  Only if I clean my room and ….. unhappy-little-boy.jpg

Children become unhappy with themselves Children are not able to self-actualize They cannot develop potential They become defensive (remember defense mechanisms?)  Denial or Repression  Aggression They deny who they are, and become anxious

Our Feelings Get in touch with how we really feel Accept those feelings as ours Act upon them Called Person-Centred Therapy

Striving toward happiness We may never be entirely happy with where we are and who we are But – The good struggle toward happiness Brings happiness

Important ideas The Self Self-regard, or Self-esteem Congruence Unconditional Positive Regard Conditional Positive Regard Conditions of Worth Person-centred Therapy Strive toward happiness

Read and answer Page 500 –Fully Functioning Person Define a fully functioning person in your own words. Page Culture, Gender and the Self What is the difference between North American/ European cultures in terms of how the self is defined? What are gender schemas? What qualities do men prize in themselves? Women?