Write Well. Right Now. How To Strengthen Personal Narratives *Adapted by Lisa C. Landis for middle school students from Lucy Calkins’ Units of Study

Writing A Personal Narrative Your life is not what happens to you, but your responses to what happens. For this reason, each one of us is ultimately the author of our own lives. We do not always control what happens to us, but we control our responses to what happens.

Telling Your Story Objectives: Provide strategies for writing a personal narrative Provide specific tools for deconstructing the prompt Strategies for internal story to further your personal narrative and make it come alive.

Internal Story Connection: Focusing your stories--keep your eyes on what is important. Focus, focus, focus in order to show me, instead of just tell me.

Attack the Prompt Narrow the prompt and make it manageable. Put a box around the words (verbs/action words) that tell you to DO something (explain, describe, tell, etc…) Circle any numbers that follow the actions. Underline the key words

Attack the Prompt--Make it Small! Here is an example: A person’s life is filled with many good memories and experiences. Describe a time in your life in which you were happy, and explain why you were happy at this particular time.

"Amusing things happen to everyone. Sometimes we do things that are funny or something funny happens to us. Many times we see a comical thing happen to someone else. Describe an incident that happened to you or to someone else that you found very humorous."

Attack the Question "You have been given the opportunity to go back in time to change one thing. What would it be and why?” "Do you ever daydream about a place you have visited that you would like to see again? Try to imagine the details of the place clearly in your mind and then write a paper in which you describe that perfect place to your reader."

Tell Your Story! Ready to write your story! First, think of a time with a person, a place, or an idea that could relate to this prompt. List moments about this person, place, idea. Think of just one moment--one story that illustrates your point--not a big story.

Tell Your Story Weekend at Disneyland Think of specific moments If you tell the story of the whole weekend, you will be telling a “watermelon" story. Tell me a small seed story instead-- tell me one moment, not the whole weekend.

Tell Your Story Disneyland Canoe ride with the family Sister got lost, but we found her Indiana Jones with my son Swimming at the Disney hotel Exploring on Tom Sawyer’s Island Sister got stuck in rock on Tom Sawyer’s Island Choose one of these “moments” to write about as a reason why the time you spent in Disneyland was fun. Make this a small seed story--just describe the moment.

How to Tell Your Story Choose your moment sketch what happened first, second, next, and last in your moment.

Strategy for Narrative A person’s life is filled with many good memories and experiences. Describe a time in your life that was exciting, and explain why this particular experience was more exciting than any other. Moments: Going to Oklahoma football game--our seats Parasailing in St. John Riding the plunge at Silver Dollar City Traveling to Orient Beach on St. Martin Getting lost on the metro in Paris Skin diving in St. John, U.S.V.I.

Parasailing on St. John Small Seed Story--Quick Rough draft telling what happened first, second, and last. Body Paragraph One: We boarded the small ship anticipating the parasailing adventure. The guides gave us instructions on how they would hook us up in the equipment, and because the machine was automated, there were some very precise instructions. I just hoped I could remember everything I was suppose to do so that I did not get injured like the guide mentioned. We were the second couple to ride tandem, and so we eagerly watched every move that the other couple made. Finally, it was our turn to fly.

Jump into the narrative… We boarded the small ship anticipating the parasailing adventure. The guides gave us instructions on how they would hook us up in the equipment, and because the machine was automated, there were some very precise instructions. I just hoped I could remember everything I was suppose to do so that I did not get injured like the guide mentioned. We were the second couple to ride tandem, and so we eagerly watched every move that the other couple made. Finally, it was our turn to fly. Notice that the narrative started right in the action! Body Paragraph 2

Paragraph Two Body Paragraph Two: We helped each other get hooked in the harness, sat down on the back of the boat, and suddenly we were lifting into the air. Being in the air, soaring through the sky, was incredibly fun. As I looked down, I saw giant sea turtles swimming through the crisp, bright blue water with a pod of dolphins playing nearby. It was almost soundless except the fluttering noise of the wind blowing past my ears and the parachute above. I wondered, Is this how birds feel as they fly through the air? Flying like a bird, feeling more than human, was a truly incredible moment.

Para. 1 Lead--your introduction using setting, action, dialogue. Para. 2 Body Paragraph #1--Part of your small seed story. Para. 3 Body Paragraph #2--Part of your small seed story. Para. 4 Ending--your conclusion using setting, action, dialogue. Your finished essay will eventually have four parts:

Add Setting, Action, Dialogue Write the lead (intro) and ending (conclusion) for your essay. A lead and ending should have: setting, action, and dialogue. Having setting, action, and dialogue will hook your reader.

You Try… A person’s life is filled with many good memories and experiences. Describe a time in your life that was exciting, and explain why this particular experience was more exciting than any other. Deconstruct--take apart--the prompt and use the strategies for writing the narrative. List moments that could be considered exciting, choose one to write about, sketch what happened first, second, and last. Follow the sketches to write two body paragraphs that follow the movie in your mind.

Next Step Once you have written what happened first, second, and last, and made a movie in your mind of the action in the narrative, it is time to construct the lead (introduction) and ending (conclusion). Add your lead and ending to the small seed story that you have written. Then revise it all to create a the perfect personal narrative. Easy, right?

The Lead How do you begin the lead of a personal narrative? Authors often begin by adding setting, action, and dialogue. You can do this in any order, but try and include all of these things in the lead to make it exciting and capture your reader’s attention. Let’s try…

The Lead I have had many experiences that I can describe as exciting and fun. On a warm summer day, on the Virgin Island of St. John, when I yelled “Sure let’s go parasailing!” who would have known I was going to experience the most excitement of my life. In this lead (introduction), I address the question, provide setting, action, and brief dialogue. What if I deleted this part?

The Conclusion Again, like the lead, include setting, action, dialogue and wrap up my narrative about an exciting time of my life. Ending: As I flew through the air, I stated to my husband “Is this just one of the best times in your life?” He agreed happily, as we slowly descended towards the ship, back to reality, with a new appreciation for adventure and excitement.

Put It All Together On a warm summer day, on the Virgin Island of St. John, when I yelled “Sure let’s go parasailing!” who would have known I was going to experience the most excitement of my life. We boarded the small ship anticipating the parasailing adventure. The guides gave us instructions on how they would hook us up in the equipment, and because the machine was automated, there were some very precise instructions. I just hoped I could remember everything I was suppose to do so that I did not get injured like the guide mentioned. We were the second couple to ride tandem, and so we eagerly watched every move that the other couple made. Finally, it was our turn to fly. We helped each other get hooked in the harness, sat down on the back of the boat, and suddenly we were lifting into the air. Being in the air, soaring through the sky, was incredibly fun. As I looked down, I saw giant sea turtles swimming through the crisp, bright blue water with a pod of dolphins playing nearby. It was almost soundless except the fluttering noise of the wind blowing past my ears and the parachute above. I wondered, Is this how birds feel as they fly through the air? Flying like a bird, feeling more than human, was a truly incredible moment. As I flew through the air, I stated to my husband “Is this just one of the best times in your life?” He agreed happily, as we slowly descended towards the ship, back to reality, with a new appreciation for adventure and excitement

Let’s Practice Deconstruct the prompt. Think of moments from your life that illustrate what is being asked--make a list of these moments. Choose one moment and sketch what happened first, second, last. Then write your story of what happened first, second, and last by making a movie in your mind. Write your lead (introduction) and ending (conclusion) by including setting, action, and dialogue.

Internal Story You have learned: How to deconstruct the prompt How to write the small seed How to write the lead and ending using setting, action, dialogue

Internal Story The next strategy is to learn how to write the internal story Internal story: develops voice shows instead of just tells the story depicts your feelings and develops ideas It is the commentary in your narrative writing!

Internal Story Internal story happens when you say: I wonder… this reminds me…I thought about… It happens when you include narrative aspects in your writing. In the past, a teacher might have told you to get to the point when you tell your story. Now, we want you to use these ideas and thoughts to develop and tell your story. You can add internal story to your rough draft as a way of revising it.

Internal Story In a story, I can run, spin, climb, yell, dig, clamor, but I can also yearn, fantasize, remember, regret, worry, and imagine When I pause in the middle of a draft to re-read my writing, I sometimes say to myself, “Let me re-read and pay attention to whether I’ve told the internal as well as the external story.” The internal story is how I feel.

Internal Story I have had many experiences that I can describe as exciting and fun. On a warm summer day, on the Virgin Island of St. John, when I yelled “Sure let’s go parasailing!” who would have known I was going to experience the most excitement of my life. We boarded the small ship anticipating the parasailing adventure. The guides gave us instructions on how they would hook us up in the equipment, and because the machine was automated, there were some very precise instructions. I just hoped I could remember everything I was suppose to do so that I did not get injured like the guide mentioned. We were the second couple to ride tandem, and so we eagerly watched every move that the other couple made. Finally, it was our turn to fly. We helped each other get hooked in the harness, sat down on the back of the boat, and suddenly we were lifting into the air. Being in the air, soaring through the sky, was incredibly fun. As I looked down, I saw giant sea turtles swimming through the crisp, bright blue water with a pod of dolphins playing nearby. It was almost soundless except the fluttering noise of the wind blowing past my ears and the parachute above. I wondered, Is this how birds feel as they fly through the air? Flying like a bird, feeling more than human, was a truly incredible moment. As I flew through the air, I stated to my husband “Is this just one of the best times in your life?” He agreed happily, as we slowly descended towards the ship, back to reality, with a new appreciation for adventure and excitement.

Our Lives Are Not Just What Happens To Us… A great writer named Theodore Roethke said to me (actually, he wrote this but I pretend he said it to me), “Lisa”, he said, “It is an illusion that writers live more significant lives than non-writers. Writers are just more in the habit of finding the significance that is there in their lives.”

Internal Story These are hugely important words to me because it means that I can write about any moment in my life--a climb to the top of The Eiffel Tower, the day my little sister got into an elevator and it took off without us, or a time when our dog, Itsy, was really bad-- and I can make that moment carry the biggest truths of my life. You can do the same!

Bringing Forth The Internal Story Specifically, I want to teach you that if I’m going to write not only what happens but my response to what happens, then much of story will be the internal story, and not just the external one.

Internal Story At the start of the lesson, I suggested that our lives are made up of not only what happens to us but also our responses to what happens to us. As writers, this means that we pause in our actions and ask “What was I thinking?” We offer our readers clues to reveal our thoughts and feelings. This is especially true in the heart of our stories.

Follow-up Tonight for homework, your job is to re- read your draft and find the heart of your story, Re-read each part of the narrative and ask “What was I thinking/feeling?” Check that you give clues that reveal your thoughts and feelings. If you haven’t included clues that reveal your thoughts and feelings, you will need to add some tonight.

Qualities of Good Personal Narratives Write a little seed story; don’t write all about a giant watermelon story. Zoom in so you tell the most important parts of the story. Include true, exact details from the movie you have in your mind. Stay inside your own point of view. This will help you write with true and exact details. Make sure stories tell not just what happens, but also the response to what happens.