St. Margaret’s Co-educational English Secondary & Primary School Ms. Gladys Leung (Counselor & Training Consultant)

Adjustment Difficulties encountered by F.1 Students

What adjustments will my child have to make when moving to secondary school? 1.Study 2.Interpersonal Relationship 3.Personal Growth 4.Relationship with Family

New challenges for our children: 1. Study a. New environment (including people) b. Learning Mode c. New Teaching mode d.More complex and varied subjects

2.Interpersonal Relationship a. Separation with primary schoolmates b. Need to build up new peer support network

3.Growth & Development a.Puberty b.Emotional fluctuation: anxieties, worries, anger…. c.Searching for Identity

4. Family Relationship Your child has to cope with various developmental tasks. He/she will: -Ask for more personal space -Need for more autonomy -Strive for Independence -Might challenge parental authority -More conflicts with parents

Parents’ difficulties Different from primary, parents find it difficult to supervise child on their study Distant relationship: Find it difficult to understand and communicate with child Feeling that child would not listen; fear of losing parental authority and influence over child Having many worries about the child e.g. study, peer association More conflicts with child

What our adolescent child does not like about their parents? Treat them as a small child Escort them to school Grumbling and preaching Over-concern and over-react Too much intervention in their peer relationship Intruding into their privacy and personal space

How Can Parents Help?

Tips for Parents: C. A. R. E. C – Communication A – Appreciation & Affirmation R – Respect & Relationship E – Empathy

Communication 1. Communicate with your child a. Show interest to their concern b. Encourage expression of feelings c. Prepare them for the transition beforehand

Communication 2. Communicate with Teachers 3. Seek help from School if necessary

Appreciation & Affirmation 1. Show Appreciation a.Appearance b.Character c.Effort d.Progress….. 2. Give Affirmation a.Wise Choices b.Right Direction c.Successes…..

Respect & Relationship a.Respect child’s need for (i) privacy and personal space (ii)autonomy: encourage your child to make some easy confidence building decisions b. Keep a good relationship

Empathy is : tthe recognition and understanding of the states of mind, beliefs, desires and emotions of others tthe ability to "put oneself into another's shoes" aa sort of emotional resonance (From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia)

Empathy a.Understand your child’s developmental needs & feelings b.Show your understanding c. Give emotional support

Tips for Parents: C. A. R. E. C – Communication A – Appreciation & Affirmation R – Respect & Relationship E – Empathy

Thank You