Seeking Godly Husbands What Does God Desire in the Family? Seeking Godly Husbands

Foundational Principles: A successful husband will begin by embracing the inherent responsibility laid out in the creation of a new family: leaving father and mother A husband must constantly saturate themselves with the reminders of scripture to be faithful to their wives in all respects A husband’s love is set apart from the skin deep surface of the world and instead patterned after Christ

Husbands as Fathers The principles that are learned in treating one’s wife in a Christ-like manner will naturally be extended to children. The number one goal of fathers is to ensure the spiritual success of their children.

What Does God Desire in the Family? Seeking Godly Wives

Foundational Principles: The wife faces the challenge of having to embrace qualities that are found extremely offensive by a wide swath of modern culture. A godly wife is enthusiastic about filling her time with “every good work”

The Wife and Her Husband A wife that embraces biblical principles will work/support her husband to accomplish much good. A wife will continue to strive toward godly goals even when she is carrying that load alone.

Marriage and the Home Divine origin Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.(Genesis 2:24 KJV)

Marriage and the Home Divine origin (Gen. 2:24) One man, one woman, for life (Matt. 19:5-6) and said, 'FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH' ? So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate." (Matthew 19:5-6 NKJV)

Marriage and the Home Divine origin (Gen. 2:24) One man, one woman, for life (Matt. 19:5-6) Universal for all men Marriage is honorable among all, and the bed undefiled; but fornicators and adulterers God will judge. (Hebrews 13:4 NKJV)

Marriage and the Home Divine origin (Gen. 2:24) One man, one woman, for life (Matt. 19:5-6) Universal for all men Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, (1 Corinthians 6:9 NKJV)

Marriage and the Home No divorce, with one exception Divine origin (Gen. 2:24) One man, one woman, for life (Matt. 19:5-6) Universal for all men (Heb. 13:4; 1 Cor. 6:9) No divorce, with one exception "Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced from her husband commits adultery. (Luke 16:18 NKJV) also (Matt. 19:9)

Marriage and the Home Perversions: Fornication, homosexuality, Divine origin (Gen. 2:24) One man, one woman, for life (Matt. 19:5-6) Universal for all men (Heb. 13:4; 1 Cor. 6:9) No divorce, with one exception (Lk. 16:18; Matt. 19:9) Perversions: Fornication, homosexuality, polygamy

Conviction Consistency Consideration Happy Homes Strong Families Conviction Consistency Consideration

CONVICTION Strong home will be built on a full confidence in God’s truth (Psa. 119:160, 105) Complete trust in and love for God and His word provides a central “hub” of conviction to ground and stabilize everyone in the home (Prov. 1:7; Deut. 6:4-9)

Lack of Conviction A home that embraces doubt and skepticism about truth invites the devil’s confusion and divisiveness Parents show little interest in Bible study while prioritizing earthly knowledge Grumble about strong Bible preaching and encourage broad, “liberal” thinking Ignore standards of morality that regulate holy conduct – conform to world Family willing to cast truth aside to defend, ignore, or hide their own sin (1 Sam. 2:29)

CONSISTENCY Every home needs to be consistent [diligent] in serving God (1 Cor. 15:58) Training of children (Deut. 6:7; Eph. 6:4) Consistent discipline (Prov. 13:24; 22:15) Holy and blameless living (Psa. 101; 1 Jn. 1:7)

CONSISTENCY The focus of the home must never be compromised – serve God always! (Josh. 24:15)

Lack of Consistency Inconsistent spirituality and obedience is destructive poison to a home Forsake the assembly of saints for worldly endeavors (confuses children) Ungodly in attitude and action at home while “pious” at worship (hypocrisy) A strong home and family is not created by “fly-by-seat-of-your-pants” (Prov. 24:3-4)

CONSIDERATION Happy homes are made up of those who are considerate of one another Patient, willing to yield, gentle, temperate, loving, time-giving (Gal. 5:22; Col. 3:12-13)

Lack of Consideration Selfishness will guarantee an unhappy home with alienated members Serve “me” first, “your” opinions are inferior, be nothing without “me,” etc. Causes anger, envy, strife, bitterness, revenge, evil desires (Col. 3:18-21)

Happy Home – Strong Family Are you doing your part for the good of everyone in your home? As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord!

The Home as God Would Have it “Home” – one of sweetest words we know! Very much a Bible subject, many texts, has much to do with our salvation.

The Home as God Would Have it Not eternal (Mt 22:30), but divine. Gen 2:24, “For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh.” Therefore governed by God. Two happiest places on earth: home, church

Preparation for Marriage Courtship – not just “have a good time” Not just “how attractive, educated, athletic” Very important questions: Free to marry? Character?? Disposition? Get along? Church? Attitude toward Bible, Christ? Good friends? Communicate? Mature?

Preparation for Marriage Leave-cleave? Will he be the head? Will she be in subjection? How treat his/her family? Work? Responsible? $$$? Contribution? Children? In-laws? Get a complete set!

Purposes of Marriage Companionship, Gen. 2:18, “It is not good that man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.” Prevent sexual immorality, 1 Cor 7:2-5 Have children, Gen. 1:28, “be fruitful …”

Purposes of Marriage Gen. 33:5, “And he lifted his eyes and saw the women and children, and said, "Who are these with you?" So he said, "The children whom God has graciously given your servant.” Ps. 127:3, “Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD.”

Marriage to be Permanent Mt 19:6, "So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.“ Mt 5:32, “whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery. Mt. 19:9, "And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for (sexual) immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery."

“Called an Adulteress” Rom 7:2, “For the woman who has a husband is bound by the law to her husband as long as he lives. But if the husband dies, she is released from the law of her husband. Rom. 7:3, “So then if, while her husband lives, she marries another man, she will be called an adulteress.” Still “bound” to her husband, even though she “marries” another man.

Don’t Leave Husband 1 Cor 7:10, “But to the married I give instructions, not I, but the Lord, that the wife should not leave her husband.” (separate) 1 Cor. 7:11, “But if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband.” Not saying, “But if she does it’s o.k. just so she doesn’t marry again.” Is saying: “Don’t make matters even worse.”

God Hates Divorce, Mal 2:16 "For I hate divorce," says the LORD.” It breaks the vows (covenant). Prov 2:17, “who forsakes the companion of her youth, and forgets the covenant of her God.” Mal. 2:14, “she is your companion and your wife by covenant.” Divorce separates what God joins, Mt 19:6. In remarriage most couples commit adultery Destroys defense against fornication. Traumatic for all, especially children. So be Christians, make your marriage work!

Husband, Head of Family Eph 5:23, “for the husband is the head of the wife, as also Christ is head of church.” Director, superintendent, leader, example. Provides needs: material, spiritual, social. Teach, train, discipline, protect his children.

Husband, Head of Family Love wife as Christ loves the church. Love wife as he loves himself. Eph 5:28,29, “So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it.”

Husbands … Express love in actions, but also in word. Prov 31:28, “her husband .. praises her.” Never cruel, Col. 3:19, “Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them.”

Husbands … Come from work angry and frustrated … Cruel words. Prov. 12:18, “There is one who speaks like the piercings of a sword.” Prov. 18:21, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue.” “We argue, make up”! Leaves terrible scars.

Be considerate … 1 Pet 3:7, “Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.” Be thoughtful, understanding. Fussing and arguing will stop all praying (and attending services). Many souls lost because of domestic quarrels.

Wife Subject to Husband Created to be his companion, helper As to salvation, equal, Gal. 3:28, “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus.” But divine order, 1 Cor. 11:3, “the head of every man is Christ, the head of woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.”

Wife Subject to Husband Subjection not inferiority, Heb 13:17, sub-jection to elders; Rom 13:1, to government. Not just resisting husband. Resisting God!

Subject tho husband not Christian 1 Pet 3:1-4, “Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. Your adornment must not be merely external -- braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.”

Extremely important role 1 Tim 2:15, “will be saved in childbearing if they continue in faith, love, and holiness, with self-control.” 1 Tim. 5:14, “I desire that the younger widows marry, bear children, manage the house.” Make it a castle, paradise, refuge. Titus 2:5, “to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed.” Great evangelist Timothy! But 2 Tim 1:5;3:15

Role of parents, Eph 6:4 Example: in home … in church (attendance, participation, wholesome attitude)… in work Principal teachers. Deut. 6:6, 7, “And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up.” UNLESS they’re on the phone, watching TV, listening to stereo, playing, doing homework

Teach them effectively Josh 4:6, “that this may be a sign among you when your children ask in time to come, saying, 'What do these stones mean to you?” Why such apostasy? Judges 2:10. “I taught them”? Effectively? With ample knowledge, conviction, enthusiasm? Consistently? Takes time, self-discipline.

Teach them effectively Bible naritives (with the lessons) produce faith, love, courage, but must be repeated. Children should participate… let them tell the Bible stories, put them in the role of “teacher” to commit themselves.

Not Provoke… Discipline Wisely Provoke? Abusive, unfair, partial, ignore, inconsistent or neglect, Prov 29:15, “left” Do the teaching we should, be good to them, praise every obedience and there’ll be little need for corporal punishment. Just so they obey! Must learn obedience.

Not Provoke… Discipline Wisely Never outgrow Bible wisdom: Prov. 13:24, “He who spares his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him promptly.” Parents must be united in discipline.

Conclusion Ps 127:1, “Unless the LORD builds the house, They labor in vain who build it.” Have solid Scriptural marriage … Each faithful in his/her role, “til death separates.” God hates divorce – very destructive. Husband – head, director, provider. Wife – in subjection, identify with husband Parents – love, teach, discipline, give LOTS of TIME to this. It’s time well spent. A good home is a foretaste of heaven!!