Concrete Nouns, Active Verbs, and Active Voice

“The good nouns are the thousands of short, simple, infinitely old Anglo-Saxon nouns that express the fundamentals of everyday life: house, home, child, chair, bread, milk, sea, sky, earth, field, grass, road … words that are in our bones, words that resonate with the oldest truths. When you use those words, you make contact—consciously and also subconsciously— with the deepest emotions and memories of your readers.”

 What are some concrete nouns you might use to describe this scene?

 Active verbs make a reader SEE what you’re writing about– they paint a precise picture of significant story details  The more exact the motion or sound you supply with your verbs, the stronger your pictures will be.  Observe the difference in picture quality of these examples:  A spectacular catch was made by Harry during the ball game.  Harry hurled himself forward, raised his gloved hand as he hit the dirt, and scooped the ball out of the air. Or  A cat was seen crossing the yard.  A cat streaked across the yard. (Or padded, crept, limped, drifted, skulked…)

 What are some active verbs you might use to describe these scenes from Throne of Blood?

Here is an incomplete list of verbs that function to signal ANALYSIS surrounding an integrated quotation or concrete detail. E.g. “With the last scene of the film, Kurosawa …” advises, advocates, affirms, agrees, alleges, argues, answers, underscores, signifies, ascribes, asserts, avows, charges, claims, concludes, criticizes, confirms, illuminates, contends, declares, denies, describes, disagrees, discusses, disputes, emphasizes, expresses, interprets, objects, offers, opposes, marks, reports, responds, reveals, indicates, evokes, suggests, implies, thinks

 Active voice is direct, vigorous, strong. In an active sentence, the subject is doing the action:  Nonso loves books.  Sebastian rapped the Eminem song.  Charlie turned on the music.  Passive voice is indirect, limp, weak– and sneaky. In a passive sentence, the subject doesn’t do anything.  Books are loved by Nonso.  The song was rapped by Sebastian.  The lights were turned on. (passive voice is like a ‘nobody’ voice!)

 Passive voice isn’t incorrect; it’s just often awkward, impersonal, and vague because it’s indirect.  Sometimes, passive voice offers a way to create a certain tone or connotation. For example, it provides the right tone for violence and disaster and accident– for any event in which the subject suffers misfortune.  “She was trapped inside the burning building.”  “He was shot”  “The child was kidnapped”  Who uses passive voice? Politicians/news media:  “Mistakes were made” (Reagan)  “Bombs were dropped”  In general though, you can tighten your writing by replacing passive with active sentences.

 Make your subjects perform with active voice: “Washizu faces his army’s retaliation.” is stronger than “Washizu is faced by his army’s retaliation.”  Rewrite the following sentences in active voice. (Add a clear subject to perform the action).  The sake was prepared. The plan was carried out. (By whom?)  The murder was committed. (By whom?)  The wall was sullied by Fujimaki’s blood.  The trees were cut down.