Integrating Quotations Into an Essay Smoothly (Remember the Sandwich)

It is important to provide some context for your quotation, and to explain it as well: Consider this example: Baba also began to teach Amir how to be his ideal of a man rather than having no hope for him. Amir says, “I kissed her hand like Baba instructed me to (167).” Baba was proud of the man Amir was becoming. He was also proud of Amir marrying into an honorable family. What is wrong with this example? How could it be improved?

Baba continued to teach Amir lessons about ideal behavior for a man. When Amir kisses the hand of Soraya’s mother at the lafz ceremony, “as Baba had instructed me to do,” it shows that Amir still looks to his father for to learn about how to behave during the traditional Afghan ceremonies (167).

How could this passage be improved? Amir being older and a more molded individual had a lot to do with why their relationship was better in America. “It is the happiest day of my life (166).” This is Baba telling Amir that he is happy and proud of him, something Amir always wanted from his father.

Amir being older and a more molded individual had a lot to do with why their relationship was better in America. For example, When Amir and Baba attend the formal lafz ceremony before Amir’s marriage to Soraya, Baba remarks that it is “…the happiest day of my life (166).” Amir, due to his maturity, is reaching milestones that fill Baba with pride and happiness.

The following passages have a number of problems. Rewrite them so that they have fluent, correct sentences and smooth transitions. The relationship between Amir and Baba changes to almost the opposite during their time in America. Baba and Amir grew closer “We stopped at garage sales and bought knickknacks” because they spent so much time on the road together (137). Baba and Amir’s relationship became more of a loving father and a loving son relationship.

Within time of adjustment, Amir and Baba become closer to each other and start to consider doing things together and getting closer “He was wearing his brown suit – his only suit that he wore to Afghan weddings and funerals” (130) (during Amir’s high school graduation). Eventually Amir and his father grow their relationship and they finally understand that they’re fixing the gap the had prior to their evacuation to the U.S.